My recovery diary - Last bet 18/02/2012 - Forwards and upwards

Evening

Cheers for the post. You sound really up beat yourself!

Good for you 40 days eve, will sit down tomorrow and read your diary.

I have no doubt that it will be show 100% determination at keeping these gambling demons at bay.

I agree with what you said I like to try to cheer people up on here, and use humour and banter as I truly believe that if your spirt is lifted you are less lightly to relapse. I do worry that a new reader will think the people's lives are broken and your making jokes.

But hopefully the person I post to , takes it in the spirt it is meant.

Right now time to eat my choc, and yes I have swopped one addiction , but that is the story of my life.

Day 40 sounds like it will be a good day, full of sun shine and mellow people happy to buy 8500 in advertising space.

Go get um

Dusty

Hi Wilsy

Thankyou for the post :0)

I dont post on yours very often but its one i follow and read often.

Sun still shining in essex,looks like you are alot happier down in sussex and the recovery is going brillantly for you and if you and the guniea pigs are happier then thats the important thing.

Onwards and upwards

Stay strong

E xx

Wilsy,

I cannot believe I have never posted on your diary considering we are only days apart in our recovery. Don't you think it is amazing when you look back at the first few posts on your diary and compare how you felt then with now. We are definetely on the right road. 50 days free will be with us in no time.

Tomso.

Hi Wilsy

I was really touched by your comments on my diary which got me thinking not just about our mums but about all the families of compulsive gamblers, the wives and husbands and children. The fact that when you stopped gambling your relationship with your mum improved makes me think how much we owe it to our families to recover. I haven't got any children at the moment but thinking how it must have been for my mum to watch me fall apart makes me think of how if I still gamble when I do have children and they are affected by it I might have to see my kids ruining their own life knowing that I would be mostly responsible. I think this would break my heart. We owe it to our loved ones to rid not only our lives of this monster but also theirs. Yes we are ill but ultimately we all have the ability to change and stop putting our families through heartache.

Becky

Today is a good day - 40 days up and I haven't had a bet 🙂

Thank you Becky for your last post, you too Dusty and Tomso, Looking back from my first post to now, I have come along way and with my families and girlfriends support, I will use their feelings as my motivation to try to remain gamble free.

Strange and stressful day today, trying to close my magazine and got an offer from an old publisher I used to work with, to go back to work with them. I have to give them a decision by Monday, oh what to do! I really don't know whether to stick or twist. This weekend I will be doing lots of thinking.

Hope you have all had good days.

Andy (Wilsy)

Just make sure that you don't get yourself to stressed with the decision making.

You will make the right decision one way or the other.

GT

Wilsy

I am glad to see another fellow compulsive gambler so positive in there recovery fella all i can say on the job front is you posed the question like a punt "Stick or twist?" sounds like there is a gamble in there maybe?? so maybe that old sayin better the devil you know??

Either way I know gamble free fella you will make the right decision for you!!

have a good weekend Fishing,bbq in or were ever you find yourself

duncs stepping forward.

41 days - no bet today

Thanks GT and Duncan. Duncan you are right there was always going to be a gamble taking the job back in East Sussex and I have decided today I am not prepared to twist, I will stick. I want to persist with what I have worked hard on over the last few years, even if it drives me nuts. I have also decided the relationship with my girlfriend is far more precious to me than a job and being too far away from her would make me very unhappy in the months ahead. I want to go back to her the new person that I am and enjoy spending my money on us having fun.

Have a good weekend both of you and everyone else, stay gamble free and enjoy life.

Andy x

42 days today without a bet.

Thought I would post early as know now that I will not be leaving the house for the rest of today. No bet today, been out in town, had a hair cut, got my fishing license went to McDonalds and got some fishing baits.

Need an early night's sleep tonight if I am to get up early to go fishing tomorrow.

Finished watching the whole first season of 'Game of Thrones' last night, absolutely brilliant, best TV Series ever made in my opinion, would recommend it as a much see to anybody.

Hi Wilsy

What fishing bait do you get from Mcdonalds? Can't say I've ever been fishing but I'd love to go do you cook what you catch? I've recently rekindled my passion for cooking. When I was gambling I used to eat really badly most nights just chips or takeaway (whatever enabled me to get back on the slots quickest). The other day I cooked a leg of lamb for my boyfriend, his sister and her partner. I was so resentful that the meat cost me 25 quid but thinking about it I would have spent that in 5 minutes gambling. God our perception of money is literally messed up! Glad to see being free of the compulsion has let you get back to fishing.

Becky

Thanks again for your post scampy.

Really pleased I went fishing today, caught some lovely carp and my first ever barbel. The sun was out it was warm and had a lovely time. Going to go again Easter Friday and Sunday.

43 days done - No bet today 🙂

wilsy.

Fella what a great 100th post, you really have embraced your life again and seem to be enjoying every minute. And rather than another day done NO BET fella I would look at it as another LIVED!!! keep it up andy you should be really proud of yourself, well done!! and a barbel to boot I listen to talk sport alot and sat/sun mornings between 6-8am is fishermans blues with keith arthurs very good, he says that a barbel is a rare find??

well odne again fella another great turn around.

duncs stepping forward and not a fish joke in sight!!!

You with your fishing and me with my jogging.

It's great that we have things to keep us occupied during these challenging recovery journeys of ours.

Much, much, much, much better than venturing into those evil gambling haunts.

GT

DAY 44 - No bet yesterday

DAY 45 - Half way through but I will predict now that I won't bet today either.

Thanks GT and Duncs, again I appreciate your comments, you are both behind me and I thank you.

Sorry I haven't been on much recently, on deadline with my magazine and lots going on but didn't take the new job and once I finish the next issue of Thursday, I should be able to post in the normal way.

Had no urges and am enjoying being me again 🙂

DAY 46 no bet today

Work very busy but I can see the light with it being the last day tomorrow. Roll on four days off and two days fishing.

Enjoy Easter everyone.