Never too late to make a fresh start

Hi toac

Watched Ronnie O'sullivan poetic, even with a bad ankle.Looking forward to the Hartlepool, Blyth game tonight bet free of course.

Stay strong Dino

Hey I'm glad you managed to have the conversation and you have the support now at home aswell as on here I have no doubt if I hadn't confided in my partner I would of cracked but now feel extra responsibility cos I don't wanna let her down.

Hope you have a good weekend stay strong.

Thanks for the encouraging words guys.

Yesterday was an easy day to resist gambling, work all day and then the gym with no money or car. If I had the wifes cash card and a night on my own what would I have done...I like to think I'd have made the right decision, these situations will occur in the coming weeks I'm sure.

Once I've got through today it will be 7 full days gamble free. Also being lie free, at least with my wife, is helping with the the depression of it all.

Not much planned today, going for an Aldi shop! Money is tight! Do a bit of tidying which is difficult for me, others find tidying theraputic but I've always been a pracrastinator and left the little jobs and they then become big jobs!

Mums for tea tonight, everything might end up coming out, hope it does really but too scared to go there with the intentions of opening up. My sister is away so could be a perfect time.

Morning toac

No day is easy mate,take all the credit for another gamble free day.

Thanks for the posts on my diary mate. As you know I opened up to my mum and after the obvious ear bashing everything is now ok and I slept a lot better last night. Once things settle down after speaking to her you will feel lots better. Nothing wrong with an Aldi shop, there are some good savings, I tend to get the basics there and the rest at the bigger supermarkets. Enjoy todays sport mate, I will be sat in enjoying Ronnie O Sullivan and the football and maybe some rugby. I love going to live sports events, however gambling always left me too skint to buy tickets, I'm hoping come April to go to the Crucible for the first time.

Well done on a week without gambling, keep it up.

Phil

Thanks guys.

BA - I went to the crucible 2 years ago for the World Championship and it was superb. Tickets are relatively cheap too, just hard to get, think you have to have your finger on the trigger.

On to day 8 now and no gambling, or real thoughts of it. Passing moments, usually stemming from adverts on TV or a friend posting their winning slips on facebook.

Back to the gym today and still in pain from Friday! Really enjoying pushing myself though, no pain no gain!

Decided to wait until the New Year to tell my mum, leaves me with some time to show I can go a month without gambling. Also Xmas will be out of the way and my Aunite is coming over from Canada to stay with her.

Thanks for the encouragment NT

Start a new working week today. Head feels clearer. Not had a drink for 9 days so that helps!

Works do on Thursday and at a clients Xmas party tomorrow, won't be overindulging tomorrow but will be having a few scoops on Thursday as they should be mostly free.

Gym again after work today, really enjoying it but my appetite is going through the roof! Also the pain in my muscles is affecting my sleep, I've been really restless. I feel fresh though so maybe don't need as much sleep as I think. Used to aim for 10 hours, now usually get around 8 which I think is about normal..

Another day gamble and practically temptation free.

Yesterday I had a leaflet from a casino company sent through the door, not bothered as it got put straight in the bin, just thought it was good timing as I haven't had one of these before. Do you think the bookmakers I self-excluded from could have sold my details? Wouldn't surprise me...

Tooth ache has kicked in now so moved my dentist appointment forward for Thursday morning, the morning before my Xmas night out.

Facebook is annoying me a bit too, everytime I block one bookmakers advert I get another, they are becoming a nuscience. Not sure if I can change something in the settings, think I managed to stop Twitter from doing it somehow.

Hi tears of a clown,

Well done on your positive post.

Suzanne xx

Hey mate, good to read you are going strong, hope the toothache gets sorted ASAP. How did you get rid of the gambling ads on Twitter? I love Twitter but everytime I go on there seems to be gambling offers, I don't even follow anyone linked with gambling. Did you enjoy the snooker on Sunday? Sadly I was in work and missed it, but it sounded like a thrilling match! Keep up the good work.

Hi BA,

I think they look at what apps you download and might even scan your messages/emails!

Not exactly sure how I did it, the last week has been a whirlwind and a lot to remember! I was blocking them one at a time and I'm sure a message came up that said something like do you want the adverts personalised to you and I chose no. Now I get very generic ads from Microsoft/Nokia etc.

I've sent some feedback to facebook but not sure it will get read!

Snooker was quite an epic, I'm usually supporting Ronnie in any game/final but when Trump made his comeback you couldn't help root for the underdog! Looking at going to the Masters/UK/Worlds in 2016 with my mate, hopefully will be in a better position mentally and financially by then!

Yesterday I had 2 back to back Xmas lunches/drinks and feeling a bit worse for wear this morning. Had a few things to do at work this morning too so was worrying about them all the way to work, now I'm here I've done them all and panic over! The life of a serial procrastinator!

Yesterday a cheque cleared in my bank for £37, as I'm a bit number OCD this was a bit of a problem! In the past I'd put the £7 into an online casino. I've always been like this with gambling, if I got up to £99 I'd have to get to £100 before I'd withdraw, quite often risking it all for a quid!

Took £30 out in cash for the night incase I needed to buy anything, although most if not all of the night should have been free. Walked past numerous bookies and really did feel the urge to go in, thought, just have a tenner as I didn't really need the money that night. Managed to fight it off quite easily with reminding myself of how I am gripped after the first win/loss.

Off to see my GP after work to see whether there is any NHS counselling available to me. I was sent on a stress class which did actually help me in some ways but the counselling I had with Gamcare was really good and make me question how my brain operates. The gamcare stuff came to a halt as it kept coming back to the worry I had and was keeping all to myself, now my wife is supporting me hopefully I can move on a bit further with the counselling.

PayDay is 9 days away and I've not yet changed my bank details so the money gets paid into my wifes account. My brain is automatically thinking there is going to be a lot of gambling tokens in my bank come the 19th. Fortunately I feel strong enough to fight this off, this really is the end of my gambling. I've told one of my mates I've quit gambling although not gone into much details why and how bad a situation I am in. He was very supportive and surprised as he know's I'm a heavy gambler, I usually seemed to win when he was around though, probably thinks I've quit while I'm ahead, couldn't be further from the truth!

In the office early today after last nights works Xmas party. Didn't drink too much, took it relatively easy.

No real temptation to gamble, one of the lads I chatted too was telling me he likes a bet but I kept the conversation short.

Not much lined up over the weekend, bit of gym and watch some sport. Probably a bit of sleep to catch up on last night!

Hi Tears,

Well done keep going and keep winning

Suzanne xx

Thanks for the positive words Suzanne!

Day 14 I beleive today! Gone really quick. 2 weeks of not gambling a penny. The not gambling part hasn't been too hard actually, the hardest bit was coming clean but that was also the most relief.

Recharging the batteries this weekend, Man U v Liverpool tomorrow so my mates will be seeing if I fancy a pint but going to have to swerve it, really need to make some sacrifices to start paying this money back.

The boredom starts here! Trying to fill my time with some low/no -cost hobbies like excercise and this diary. Really would like a little part time job I could do at home, tried eBay before but that was a disaster! Might have been the gambling though which made me not pay the ebay bills and forget to post things off, in fact it definitely was!

Just about to pop out to the gym then back to catch up on the football scores and watch Arsenal v Newcastle tonight.

Had money in my bank the last few days, not a lot but enough to gamble so I can take some pride in that I had the self control.

Hi Tears.......feel proud of the two weeks.......I am on day 11....right behind you and with you.........I am looking forward to hopefully reaching that two week target........yes, the boredom is something that needs to be looked at.....get that out of the way and I believe the battle is made that little bit easier......