Hello all,
So, I went back to gambling for the whole of February and half of March. What did I learn? How much did the experience cost me? Am I better for it? What is the outcome? All will be revealed.
After a week or so of fighting off gambling urges, I unfortunately (despite the members on here telling me rightly what to do) went back to gambling. I bought a system off ebay. Yes, I know, it's a dumb thing to do. I tested it out and by george it won! So I put my money on it and it gave mixed results. I put more money on it and I was showing profit. So I put loads more money on it and guess what happened? Yes, that's right, I lost a load of money. That night, I couldn't sleep. I was sweating, I was anxious, I was angry, I was annoyed. I took it out on the chancer who sold me the system. No answer. I tried to get a refund from ebay. Not happening. Then I thought, I know, I'll withdraw the rest of the money from my account and close it down. However, I left £45 in the account "to play with". I told myself, I would only bet using that system. I was doing it wrong and I can afford to lose £45. Sure enough, the system was working and I made it up to £70. But the system was boring. Backing 1-12 shots with that sort of money - nah. Not for me. So before you know it, I'm back gambling as I used to. Poker, football, horse racing.
I bet on one horse who was clearly going to win approaching the winning line and the jockey jumped off the horse. I just laughed. This was my life. Gambling to me was just a joke. A complete load of <beep>.
I also bought a tipster service for a month! ha ha. £10. I have to get this all out in the open. I need to shame my behaviour and see it for what it is - ludicrous. So £50 wasted on gambling systems and blaggard tipsters. Over £100 lost at the bookies.
Anyway, you know the rest - I lost all bar £10.77 which I withdrew yesterday. That £10.77 means a lot to me. It's the symbol of my new life.
Why did I return to gambling?
I have no idea. I think it was because my life was empty, not going as it should. Things seemed wrong.
Anyway, that's in the past now. What do I need to do today? I need to be what I want to be. What do I want to be?
I want to be healthy in mind and body and spirit. When I gamble, I'm not healthy. I eat junk food. Ice cream, crisps, chips, oil laden junk. My diet usually consits of toast. This is a fast track and miserable journey to an early grave in my opinion.
When I don't gamble, I'm a lot healthier. Today, I've eaten loads of fruit for breakfast. I feel better.
Mental health? When I gamble, I get night sweats, I'm anxious about the money I've lost. I get depressed with my life.
When I don't gamble, I still get stresses of life, but I don't get night sweats. I have less reason to be anxious about money and I get really happy with my life. I have an attitude of grattiude.
The main problem for me is lack of motivation. I am pretty sure that's what steered me into gambling. Ah well, like I said, those days are gone now. So today. I'm motivated to do stuff. Do the dishes, clearn my room, apply for jobs, chase up other business enquiries, post on gamcare, listen to stop gambling hypnosis, read books, better myself, be happy, smile more, etc.
What do I want to be today? Happy, energetic, lovely, nice, fun, open, honest, supportive, grateful, focussed, strong.
Today is important. It's my life. I can be who I want to be.
Hey tulsit.
I guess In a way you saw this coming I remember you saying you tried to log on to an old account a few months back.
I remember reading a diary not so long back from a tipster he gave a great insight into how these so called professionals work. The majority like us are compulsive gamblers. Just making a fast buck out of extremely desperate people. I really don't believe a 1/12 is even a tip, but even a dead cert can let you down because gambling on sport is completely random. Like yourself winning a pound here and there was never enough I needed high octane gambling to get my fix,
My biggest qualm with the so called tipsters is that the money you lose they make a five percent buffer if you sign up through their link. Some of these accounts on social media have well over 100k followers. What I'm saying is do you think that maybe they would give you a good tip or most likely give you a bad so they make some money?
Sorry for the ramble but thanks for showing us even after a 2 year break it's still there waiting
All the best
And please read your opening post every day so you can not only remember the bad but also what you want to achieve
Deano
Cheers Deano. This tipster is a fraud. It goes to show that desperate thoughts are completely worthless. Thanks for the response.
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