One day at a time-again!

Thanks for popping by, X

Keep going and keep winning, one day at a time of course:)))

Suzanne xx

Cheers Suzanne xx 🙂

So day 10 and probably why I have been gambling again is because I had the money to. Always thought this would be the case when I started earning decent money again that this could happen,and it did. Should have just come back here when the low level gambling began. Been on such a tight budget for years, plus the fact my struggle with debts has been a constant reminder of the s**t I got myself into. Still in debt though. Thousands down the tubes and still paying for it seven years on. Now I'm in a good starting position to get out of all of this. I hate how gambling gets me, how I feel out of control, and how I so easily can just go free fall and adapt a f**k it attitude, I actually did not think I would get like that again, but I did and it scared me. So will keep counting the days. And keep myself safe.

I know that attitude you talk about,

I am trying to have a caring, positive attitude, but it isnt that easy. I realise that when you win and walk away it feels good to be able to spend freely afterwards. Until you hit the back to sqaure 1 zone the itch kicks in again (stress). Then if you fall into a negative state it is all or nothing and that is the tipping point! You have a dont give a s**t attitude until you re coup the losses. Unfortunately you never can re coup.

One fine day, when you have left gambling in the distance and you have money and are coping with life. A little voice will say in your head. Go on try, it wont harm to lose a little, and hey, I might even win. Problem with that is, the ride will start all over again. The worst things are internet, and fobts. However, little bets lead you by the hand to the big bets!

Dont gamble.

Stay strong.

Hiya Dervkidd, yep you are so right, when you say about the ride starts all over again! Luckily I have got off it again before it became the develish rollercoaster! That's an understatement. Ride to hell more apt. Thank you for your message xx

So day 13 I'm really only popping in and out of here at the moment for it is all I can cope with. Gambling over took my life, and gambling recovery took over my life, and the latter was necessary, no doubt. At the moment I am trying to strike a balance with everything. I don't feel right in some respect in not supporting others like I have done in the past, so being somewhat anti social for the time being. No urges to gamble today. Going to cr*ck this.

Day 14

Day 15

Hey day 15,

Well done you, the first.couple of weeks can be tough,

Keep going and keep winning and feel proud because you are doing this

Suzanne xxx

Thank you Suzanne xx

Day 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 so now is day 26. No gambling. Day 17 I was heading into the shop and the thought crossed my mind to buy a scratchcard, have always said I'm not addicted to this type of gambling, but I've made a promise not to gamble and that is any shape or form. It could have went two ways, I'd buy a card, lose and feel s**t. It's like I over react , and I think it is only because it brings back memories, that horrible stinking feeling of being empty, empty of pocket and just empty. Could have led to buying another one so as to win an not feel like that. Then on the other hand, I could win, and starts planting the seed, start remembering the wins, get cocky, feeling lucky...and then the gambling head rears. So anyway did not buy a scratchcard I would lose either way. I'd just get into the cycle.

I've been dealing with a few financial things, it is slow. I'll truck on with it all, I just think if I got rid of my debts it would close a door that I want closed, for good.