Thanks for the messages folks, great to have the support of people on here. Beezer thanks for the virtual beer mate, went down a treat with the virtual chilli nuts!!
Well, havent been online since Friday so heres the update :
Friday - had friends round to watch the England game, no gambling urges, thoughts of gambling whilst watching the game, but certainly no urges.
Saturday - Took kids out on Saturday morning before playing football on Saturday afternoon, won 6-0 then went home for a takeaway with the missus. Resulted in being up all night on trap 1 - no urges at all
Sunday - Dodgy stomach continued yesterday. Wife took kids out in the afternoon and I was lying in bed feeling sorry for myself and watched some racing, no bet but the mind started thinking, and feel dissapointed that I even switched on the racing channel and put myself in a more vunerable position and do not want to become complacent. As soon as the mind started virtal betting (I would have backed that etc), switched to Karate Kid III, which is, a shocking film I must say!
Stomach still a bit raw today, but in work and determined to make today a gamble free day.
Last bet was 534pm August 19th, so heres to day 18
Take care all
Blues
Blues,
How is it going mate? Well done on your gamblefree weekend, I bet your missus is loving the new you, keep up the football as well mate, nothing beats the buzz of exercise, well done on day 18 and keep going strong, it will become much easier.
Well, day 18 passed without any real urges, the rain was so heavy, was glad just to get home. Was supposed to be playing football but a few fair weather players pulled out cos it was a little wet!!
Onto day 19, and feeling good today, football training tomorrow evening, so will spend the evening relaxing and watching the football,
Take Care
Blues
Blues,
19 days mate, congratulations. Your going from strength to strength, also your playing football regularly, something that is helping you immensly with this evil.
keep going mate, you can do it.
Take it easy
Well, finished work early and spent the early evening playing with the kids. They were tucked up safe and sound by kick off and enjoyed relaxing and watching the footy. No urges whatsoever yesterday and feeling rather upbeat again today, looking forward to the day ahead - this is day 20 of the most difficult but AMAZING journey that I have been on. I feel that something, somewhere has given me a chance to put right all the wrongs I have committed against the people I care about over the years. I'm not a religious man, but something is definately helping me this time
Take Care
Blues
Blues
How are you mate, thanks for your post as always, Day 20 wow, your going from strength to strength mate, well done.
Your also spending time with the most precious ones like your kids, your really getting more positive as each day goes on.
Take care mate speak soon
Hi Blues, i did exactly the same as you last night, tucked the kids in and then watched the footy. It's so much more relaxing watching a game when you have no money on it. England also played well which was a bonus. It feels good to stop and start your life again. This feeling will only get better with time. Keep it up chap. Russ
Hi blues,
20 days, well done! That's brilliant! You are now well on your way to winning this huge fight!
So lovely to see that you had a really normal evening with your kids then watching the football. Lucky you, being able to watch it as I did not go for ** *** when I ordered my Sky last week.
Still, there will be plenty of football matches to enjoy on HD soon!
Keep it up and go for a whole month gamble free now!
October (45 days to go)
Hi,
Thanks for the posts, much appreciated.
Went football training last night and legs sore enough this morning. Onto day 21 and at 534pm today it will be three weeks since my last bet. GA this evening to help the recovery along. I will beat this, along with the rest of you...
Take Care Blues
Blues,
Hello mate, how is it going? jeez mate, the amount of football your playing at the moment, I wouldnt be surprised if united came knocking for a transfer.
3 weeks today mate, a big congratulations, i bet you make your wife and kids very proud when you look back.
You have been there for me along this journey so its only fair if i buy you a virtual drink mate, cheers.
take care
Just need to get something off my chest. Having a good day, urge wise, no problem at all, but one thing is bothering me and I'm feeling really selfish for thinking like this. Since handing over control of my money, things have been going ok (I ask for what I want, when I need it, explaining what its for). In the last 48 hours, this is really getting to me, making me feel somewhat inferior for having to ask for money. I know I dont need the temptation of having cash in my pocket, but it feels like i'm getting pocket money - i'm 34 for gods sake,
Take care
Blues
Blues,
Feel free to talk about anything on your chest mate, you have been great help to peeps on this site so you will in return find that support and advice back.
I know what you mean about the money thing (although im not in that situation), does it feel like you are not in control of your money? do you feel guilty of asking the missus? do you feel like your missus will know exactly what you buy?
However if it has been working for you so far then its great mate, maybe with time you can trust yourself again and Im sure those days are not too far away.
Thanks for the reply mate. It's not so much her knowing what I buy, because i've nothing to hide (what I say I need cash for, I go and get). It's not really guilt (although i've a lot of guilt about the bigger picture), its more the fact that i'm starting to analyse what i have become, a shadow of my former self. Used to be out every weekend, treating the kids to this that and the other, or out with mates, going for meals etc. Now i'm asking my wife for a fiver for this a fiver for that. Feels like the school trips when you had an envelope for each day. Sure I will get over it but its making me pretty angry and needed to share it. It was actually my decision to do this so that even if i had urges, i couldnt act on them financially
Thanks mate
Blues
Its ok mate,
I know what you mean about being a different person, i use to be same, use to go out with mates, laughing all the time, used to go out with the missus, always confident.
Now i feel like a depressed person, worrying all the time, thinking how im going to be in the future, all of this is down to that evil called Gambling.
Things will get better mate, trust me, with time you will be the same guy again.
Take it easy mate
Keep your chin up blues, I worry about in ten years time, when I'm out of prison and my fiancee is controlling the fiances.
In my former life, Im quite generous and my fiancee isnt, she will walk an extra 10 miles to the next chippie to save a £1, and I know like you the control element will start to frustrate me, but I guess we deserve it and should thank out partners for sticking by us and not jumping ship.
Hang in there mate.
Smokes.
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