The closest I've come to gambling for 861 days (my last bet)

TulsiT wrote:

I took my son to football but we had a long time for the next train. We had another 35 minutes. I was cold, tired, hungry and fed up that the 8.20 had been cancelled. I was in bed just 40 minutes ago, hadn't had breakfast, didn't have a good night sleep and was in a pretty bad mood.

What were we going to do for 40 minutes? I decided we would get a newspaper read it and that would kill time... So we got a tabloid paper - the Daily Star. It's rubbish I know but there was an article about our favourite team so we bought it. We sat there reading the paper, doing the sports quiz. It was all harmless stuff and before we knew it the train had arrived.

We carried on reading the paper. I saw that Sandown races was on. I used to like going there. But I told my son to throw the racing supplement in the bin...then I noticed there was football tips and betting on the back... I was just about to tell him not to throw it in the bin, then I realised that my triggers had been made!

I forgot about it, he played a tournament, finished second but was ok with it despite strops on the pitch. We returned. My wife had a go at me for no reason. I offered to help her cook lunch but she went crazy. What is it with that woman? hormones? She's always mad! We had a mild argument, I told her where to go (not nice)... but she gave me a lot worse than I gave her! Please don't judge!

Anyway, we had a nice lunch, things were ok. We played some video games but I really fancied a bet. I went on Twitter to tell my mates I fancied a bet and asked them who they were on. A bit of banter was had all good humoured. I had made my choices. Three teams. Looked at the line ups and it all makes perfect sense. I'd chosen my teams and away we go! The bookmakers offering the best odds were visited by me online. I forgot my password but recovered it.... I tried to log in but I'd self excluded from there! Wise move. It's been over two years since my last bet. 861 days. 30 August 2014.

however, the strong urge to bet was there... I'm glad I self excluded myself but I needed to bet. Let's go to another site. I did. Forgot my password. Retrieved it. Logged back in. Wait? What's this? changes in price to my teams? My returns had gone down by £10!

Anyway. I tried to bet. What's this? My card expired? Eh. It's 14:57. I need to bet on the football. I updated my card details all along knowing this probably isn't the best idea. My card details were updated. Deposit button pressed. It's 14.58 now. Nearly 14:59 by now surely... I filled in the amount I wanted to deposit. security code needed... I'm looking at it thinking... don't do this... You haven't bet for over 861 days.

Fortunately I didn't bet. I closed all tabs and came on Gamcare.

I'm shaken up. That was so close. I still feel the adrenaline of nearly having a bet. But I didn't!

Bullet dodged...just !

Regroup - and get more focussed again.

Sbb

Awe i too also came very close last night i,d not gambled since april 20th last year. Tried to make a new account last night but it picked up that i was using same name an address an said i was unable to register any new accounts. With that i realised i didnt want to go back down that route and i stopped myself from trying to register any others . So the biggest well done on deciding not to go through with that bet and i suggest today in a different frame of mind contacting the site as self excluding .....you got this you CAN do this 861 days is such an achievement to reach stay strong x from chrissy

Thanks for the responses. All three teams LOST. I would have LOST again. I would have LOST 861 days from gambling. I would probably be at the casino tonight or on line playing poker... I am considering going to GA tonight but maybe it's not necessary. Phew what a day! Chrissy, I'm glad you didn't bet either!

Well done on not betting but a lot was to do with luck not judgement don't make that excuse tonight get to GA you know you will feel better once you have been. Would be a good idea to get it out in the open with the Mrs as well.

KTF

TulsiT wrote:

I took my son to football but we had a long time for the next train. We had another 35 minutes. I was cold, tired, hungry and fed up that the 8.20 had been cancelled. I was in bed just 40 minutes ago, hadn't had breakfast, didn't have a good night sleep and was in a pretty bad mood.

What were we going to do for 40 minutes? I decided we would get a newspaper read it and that would kill time... So we got a tabloid paper - the Daily Star. It's rubbish I know but there was an article about our favourite team so we bought it. We sat there reading the paper, doing the sports quiz. It was all harmless stuff and before we knew it the train had arrived.

We carried on reading the paper. I saw that Sandown races was on. I used to like going there. But I told my son to throw the racing supplement in the bin...then I noticed there was football tips and betting on the back... I was just about to tell him not to throw it in the bin, then I realised that my triggers had been made!

I forgot about it, he played a tournament, finished second but was ok with it despite strops on the pitch. We returned. My wife had a go at me for no reason. I offered to help her cook lunch but she went crazy. What is it with that woman? hormones? She's always mad! We had a mild argument, I told her where to go (not nice)... but she gave me a lot worse than I gave her! Please don't judge!

Anyway, we had a nice lunch, things were ok. We played some video games but I really fancied a bet. I went on Twitter to tell my mates I fancied a bet and asked them who they were on. A bit of banter was had all good humoured. I had made my choices. Three teams. Looked at the line ups and it all makes perfect sense. I'd chosen my teams and away we go! The bookmakers offering the best odds were visited by me online. I forgot my password but recovered it.... I tried to log in but I'd self excluded from there! Wise move. It's been over two years since my last bet. 861 days. 30 August 2014.

however, the strong urge to bet was there... I'm glad I self excluded myself but I needed to bet. Let's go to another site. I did. Forgot my password. Retrieved it. Logged back in. Wait? What's this? changes in price to my teams? My returns had gone down by £10!

Anyway. I tried to bet. What's this? My card expired? Eh. It's 14:57. I need to bet on the football. I updated my card details all along knowing this probably isn't the best idea. My card details were updated. Deposit button pressed. It's 14.58 now. Nearly 14:59 by now surely... I filled in the amount I wanted to deposit. security code needed... I'm looking at it thinking... don't do this... You haven't bet for over 861 days.

Fortunately I didn't bet. I closed all tabs and came on Gamcare.

I'm shaken up. That was so close. I still feel the adrenaline of nearly having a bet. But I didn't!

Thank you so much for sharing this...It's a major reminder that I can NEVER think it's over, NEVER become complacent...The devil will always be ready to pounce!

Wishing you all the very best in your continued journey.

M x

If you had placed the bet you would of lost even if all three teams won.

From my experience these situations dont just come out of thin air. They dont exist in a bubble and they don't come about from one cold morning and one argument with the OH. Anytime I have been close to gambling or even gambled after a period of abstinence something hasn't been right and the fall back into old destructive ways has been brewing for sometime.

A wiser man than me told me there is no such things as slips. We dont gamble by accident, we plan it out, we rationise it, we reason with yourselves that its the thing too do. You went to alot of trouble to have a bet and you only didnt do so by chance. Did this really all come out of the blue? Maybe it did and I am competely off but its a question worth asking yourself.

robf wrote:

If you had placed the bet you would of lost even if all three teams won.

From my experience these situations dont just come out of thin air. They dont exist in a bubble and they don't come about from one cold morning and one argument with the OH. Anytime I have been close to gambling or even gambled after a period of abstinence something hasn't been right and the fall back into old destructive ways has been brewing for sometime.

A wiser man than me told me there is no such things as slips. We dont gamble by accident, we plan it out, we rationise it, we reason with yourselves that its the thing too do. You went to alot of trouble to have a bet and you only didnt do so by chance. Did this really all come out of the blue? Maybe it did and I am competely off but its a question worth asking yourself.

I think you are right. I don't like asking myself questions but there's a big pile of stuff to deal with. I think this near miss was an attempt to escape BUT - I think there were daft moves (buying the paper was not a good move).

Sillycow wrote:

[quote=TulsiT]

I took my son to football but we had a long time for the next train. We had another 35 minutes. I was cold, tired, hungry and fed up that the 8.20 had been cancelled. I was in bed just 40 minutes ago, hadn't had breakfast, didn't have a good night sleep and was in a pretty bad mood.

What were we going to do for 40 minutes? I decided we would get a newspaper read it and that would kill time... So we got a tabloid paper - the Daily Star. It's rubbish I know but there was an article about our favourite team so we bought it. We sat there reading the paper, doing the sports quiz. It was all harmless stuff and before we knew it the train had arrived.

We carried on reading the paper. I saw that Sandown races was on. I used to like going there. But I told my son to throw the racing supplement in the bin...then I noticed there was football tips and betting on the back... I was just about to tell him not to throw it in the bin, then I realised that my triggers had been made!

I forgot about it, he played a tournament, finished second but was ok with it despite strops on the pitch. We returned. My wife had a go at me for no reason. I offered to help her cook lunch but she went crazy. What is it with that woman? hormones? She's always mad! We had a mild argument, I told her where to go (not nice)... but she gave me a lot worse than I gave her! Please don't judge!

Anyway, we had a nice lunch, things were ok. We played some video games but I really fancied a bet. I went on Twitter to tell my mates I fancied a bet and asked them who they were on. A bit of banter was had all good humoured. I had made my choices. Three teams. Looked at the line ups and it all makes perfect sense. I'd chosen my teams and away we go! The bookmakers offering the best odds were visited by me online. I forgot my password but recovered it.... I tried to log in but I'd self excluded from there! Wise move. It's been over two years since my last bet. 861 days. 30 August 2014.

however, the strong urge to bet was there... I'm glad I self excluded myself but I needed to bet. Let's go to another site. I did. Forgot my password. Retrieved it. Logged back in. Wait? What's this? changes in price to my teams? My returns had gone down by £10!

Anyway. I tried to bet. What's this? My card expired? Eh. It's 14:57. I need to bet on the football. I updated my card details all along knowing this probably isn't the best idea. My card details were updated. Deposit button pressed. It's 14.58 now. Nearly 14:59 by now surely... I filled in the amount I wanted to deposit. security code needed... I'm looking at it thinking... don't do this... You haven't bet for over 861 days.

Fortunately I didn't bet. I closed all tabs and came on Gamcare.

I'm shaken up. That was so close. I still feel the adrenaline of nearly having a bet. But I didn't!

Thank you so much for sharing this...It's a major reminder that I can NEVER think it's over, NEVER become complacent...The devil will always be ready to pounce!

Wishing you all the very best in your continued journey.

M x

Yes. Absolutely. I became complacent for sure. I spoke to a friend who used to be in GA with me ages ago. He went back to gambling after 2 years. He said to me that I will probably go back to gambling. Part of me disagreed with him, part agreed with him. I don't want to gamble but of course there is a part of me that does want to gamble.

As ever, it's about the choices that you make. You presumably made a choice to stop going to meetings. The GA experience is that gambling can be arrested but never cured and the decision to stop meetings precedes the sort of situation that you describe. You have the choice now to go back or to tell yourself that you don't need it.

The choice is yours alone but it affects you and those around you. Choose wisely.

CW

Cynical wife wrote:

As ever, it's about the choices that you make. You presumably made a choice to stop going to meetings. The GA experience is that gambling can be arrested but never cured and the decision to stop meetings precedes the sort of situation that you describe. You have the choice now to go back or to tell yourself that you don't need it.

The choice is yours alone but it affects you and those around you. Choose wisely.

CW

GA didn't work for me. I was always going back to gambling. What worked for me was a horrendous streak where I'd lose nearly every bet and phone calls to the gamcare helpline. I also used a stop gambling hypnosis app.

I'll stick with gamcare and the hypnosis app but comments earlier hit the nail on the head. There's stuff going on in my life that I need to address! Stopping gambling is key but I almost feel like I'm back to square one now. Yes, my last bet was well over two years ago but I've opened that box yesterday. My thoughts are all over the place. My brain is telling me that I can make money from gambling.

What's that saying about doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results!!!

I went two years without a bet and when I went back to gambling it felt like those two years were nothing more than a blink of an eye and I fitted right back into my old ways like a well worn shoe.

What's the s**t that's happening in your life? What are you trying to deal with and maybe struggling with?

-

robf wrote: I went two years without a bet and when I went back to gambling it felt like those two years were nothing more than a blink of an eye and I fitted right back into my old ways like a well worn shoe.

What's the s**t that's happening in your life? What are you trying to deal with and maybe struggling with?

Thanks for the comment Rob. I expect it to be the same thing again... In fact I am already thinking of new systems to make a load of cash...The reality is always the opposite.

The difficult stuff? Marriage, business, and money... Funnily enough the third will get much worse if I gamble but also ..mental health, physical health, diet, relationships, attitude, etc...