the end of the road, a new start on the way

you are still an inspiration to me ands, as much as ever. I admire you immensely, and your mistakes do NOT define you. We all make mistakes, but a strong man like yourself can move forward and learn from them. This experience can enhance your recovery, if you just give yourself a break 😉

lots of love,

f x

Thanks freda

I have not gamble today!

Hi Ands.

I don't think i have contributed on your diary before. There are so many diaries on here that i tend to stick to the same ones. My thoughts are with you following your recent lapse. A reminder to me that i must never get complacent.

This is a message for you from Smokey.....

" I know they won't get to read this, but someone Ive followed since my days on Gamcare and as DD eluded to on his diary, it's very sad to see Ands slip after 17 months.

However don't be too hard in yourself, no-one is perfect in life, you know what you've done isn't good for you, so tattoo that new date in your brain and that's the last time you'll do it because a cg returning to gambling will always mean losses.

Chin up."

All the best Ands.

Thanks Curly

Saturday and sunday i have not gambled, nie weekend with my sons.

Love my sons, f*****g hate gambling!

ands

Gutted for you mate.... only just realised you had posted. I hope you are doing ok.... I don't know what to say except keep your chin up, you can do it!

I rucking hate gambling too.

Jim

Hope you are OK my friend. You always have my e-mail addy if I can help.

Hi ands, thank you for your kind post. Although you may not think so at the moment....you have inspired many on here, including myself. You showed what could be done and I thank you for that. I hope you and the boys are well. Spring is nearly here....a great time to get out and enjoy life. Take care big man. Russ

Needed to get myself together and i have, back in full flow on my recovery and 27 days gamble free accumalated. A lot of soul searching and more emotions released.

Guess the recovery process goes a lot deeper than i could ever imagine, too many years of mindless gambling, so at times the emotions are oozing out of me. Had the heavy depression last year and the loss of my mother but i did not gamble through these hard times. Life strange, hard but can be so very good!

Everyone deserves some form of happiness and our children certainly deserve gamble free parents.

Dont realy care anymore what people think of me anymore, thats positive and another turning point in my life.

Sounds stupid but i dont give a f***, its my diary.

So i will beat the 17 months and go for 17 months and 1 day or maybe 2.

Back to the backbone of my diary, odaat...........

I crazy!

(((Ands)))

Sorry, I have been AWOL for a serious amount of time from here, so only just starting to try & catch up.

Back to the backbone of my diary, odaat...........

I really like the sound of that... and I know you are more than capable of facing the road ahead. You sound strong in your commitment Ands.

"Everyone deserves some form of happiness and our children certainly deserve gamble free parents."

Fantastic statement and so true. I have always admired you Ands, what you have been through in your young life and the way you have handled some seriously bad situations that you found yourself in because of gambling, whilst still determined to work hard & give your boys everything that was needed for them. Not to mention a never ending supply of love.

Your boys deserve a gamble free parent... and I know that is just what you will give them. 😉

See you around my friend

Health & Hapiness being sent your way!

Jackie x

Hi Ands and thanks for your support mate. Your a good man. Your openness and honesty is all credit to you. You have got back on track just as i will. Keep going.. warm regards.. S.A 🙂

Thanks for your posts!

Over a week since my last post and in that time i have not gambled in any form.

On i go, my slip up is now getting further and further behind me.

My sons are my future, gambling has no further part to play in my life nor has the self loathing or the beating myself up!

Love my sons and i am going to beat the 17 months gamble free.

ands

also just dropping by to say "hi" and give you my love.

You have come such a long way ands, the equivalent of several marathons!

Take care,

f x

What a strong bloke . Love you ( in a brotherly way of course ) . Just hope one day we might meet up .

Hi Ands... I can't sleep so thoughts i'd do a bit of posting... erm not sure what to say now.. lol ... my back hurts. Stay strong my friend am sure you will.. S.A 🙂

Thanks for your posts!

Easter break here for me, kids broke up yesterday and not back to work til 27th......

Have not gambled since my slip up and off camping with my sons next week for 5 days, near hastings. Fishing, crazy golf and some good old cooking. Not the best holiday i know, but my sons cant wait, nor can i... Fun and sun, i hope lol!

Still gutted mind you, cos if i never slipped up i would be counting down to 2 years gamble free, instead im not, lol. But hey such is life, f*** knows where i.d be now, if i was gambling and stealing now, more than likely would have lost my sons to social services and probably be in prison or dead.

So on with life, love my sons.

Have a great gamble free easter. Gonna post again after easter, gonna have some serious quality time with my boys. ands