the end of the road, a new start on the way

Yay! glad to see you are still doing great 🙂

You are right about family, it would only work if they forgave you, because otherwise the put downs and digs would make you feel worse. Its not nice having your past thrown back in your face.

You were behaving out of character due to addiction, and this is the real ands. And he is a star, and a fantastic Dad.

you referred to money being tight, Im sure your boys feel loved and secure and that is all that matters.

Take care,

f x

Hi Ands

Thanks for posting on my diary mate, always good to hear from you.

I hope that I can turn my life around like you have. You are a genuine inspiration to me and you show me that it can be done. You should be very proud of what you have achieved, and I hope one day your family see that. But in the meantime you have 2 fantastic boys who have a fantastic dad. Enjoy the camping trips 🙂

Take care mate 🙂

Hey Ands... Just a note to say hello and hope all is good enjoying the summer hols with your kids I bet.

Catch you soon, Jim

Thanks for your posts!

Gamble free and going strong, of to the lake district camping with my boys on friday. The joys of not wasting money gambling and i feel good.

ands

Hey there ands, just wanted to say hello and congrats on still going strong and gamble free.

I am in that calm place too, wondefully peaceful these days.

have a great time with your kids.

take care

W xxx

Thanks W

Been a while since posting!

Great summer, camping, mud, sun and more mud....Boys loved it and so did i!!

This is what life is all about not some brain numbing machine and all the s**t and pain that comes with it!!!

Life for me at the moment, is the best it has ever been, im almost there, still improvements to be made tho!

Anyways, note to self.........slip up count 2 in well over 2 years, thats progress!

ands

Hello my friend . Thanks for the txt . Not much good at doing them myself but so good to read where life is taking you .

I am thankful that the deep depression and anxiety is gone but still some hurdles before I get really well .

Still very proud of you . Say hi to the lads , eh?

Thanks Graham

Been a while since posting, often come on here and read a few diaries.

Still gamble free, and have finally worked out my recovery.... Gonna sound somewhat crazy but there is a method to my madness.

My goal is to remain gamble free til oct next year, then i shall rethink my method, i will not gamble for another 12 months, then i would have beaten my last effort of 18 months. If after this time i slip up, i will then start the next stage of my recovery. That is to beat the length of time between each slip ups. I am not setting myself up for a binge or justifying any blips i have had.

Have been on this forum now for well over 2 years and i have had only 2 slip ups and the last one was well over 8 months ago!

Yeah, my life is so much better without the s**t what comes with the addiction and the heartbreak it causes!!!!

Might sound a load of cr**, but i know exactly what i am meaning!

Love my sons, always and forever! i hope my mum is looking down on me, with a little smile on her face, cos im sooo different than what i was 2 and a half years ago.

Hi ands,

So pleased to hear that life is going well for you and the boys. I know that when they are older and they know what you have had to overcome, they will be incredibly proud of you.

Strange method of yours though... but you are now strong enough to follow it through.

It's always worth thinking about where we were at a certain point in the past but don't forget to dream about where you would like to be at a certain point in the future!

I know exactly where I would like to be!

All the very best,

GT

So proud of you young buddy. Saw that shining star within your gloom. Look at you now. You wonder how I do it? I have to laugh but all I can say is that I am flawed, just like all people. I get more from helping out than the person who receives. May God bless us all.

Ands, you are still a living legend mate!

I can't really comment on whether I believe in all this stuff or not, because I have never lost someone close to me - but they say if you ask her to give you a sign she is watching over you, she will. You can do it either out loud, or just in your head.

Anyway, I know not everyone is comfortable with stuff like that.

Lots of love to you and your boys. Remember, the important thing is that you are proud of yourself - and you should be.

f x

Ah, thanks for your posts!

Been a while since been on this forum.. Thought id post my last entry of the year on my diary.

Life is good for me, off to eurodisney on monday, 3 days gonna be great......... Money saved from not gambling, what a buzzzz, so chuffed. Boys have new bikes for christmas and i am so prepared.

Dont know when i last gambled now but its quite some time ago, target oct2012, i will meet this target and that will be over 18 months gamble free.

I wish you all a very merry christmas and all the best for the new year.

Thank you all for you support this year, and last year been around a while. s**t, scarey, lol!

Hi Ands,

thanks for the post, I havent been around too much either but it was great to read how well you are doing and the positivty in your life. I am sure the boys are and will be so proud of their Dad 🙂

I have every confidence you will make that 18 months target in October 2012.

Enjoy Euro Disney,wishing you all a Happy Christmas and peaceful New Year.

Take care

love W xxx

Hi Ands,

Hope you have a great time in Paris, hope you all have a fab Christmas.

All the very best.

Jim

Been quite some time since last posting, often pop in and read the odd diary.

Life in ands world is pretty good, had a great time in eurodisney, boys loved it! Had a realy nice christmas and went to a wicked party new year.

Not gambled now for a long time, over a year now.....Those slip ups are a distant memory and hard work always pays off.

Have put on half a stome of weight in the last 12 months and now a whopping 8 stone, i no longer get weighed at gp,s and no longer have a clinical diagnosis of an eating disorder. Off all sleeping medication and have had counselling for the loss of my mother (which has been a godsend for me).

Total turn-around in my little life, the love for my sons has been and always will be my no. 1 focus, gambling will no longer destroy anymore of my life. Love is far more important than some sh*tty machine!

I am a lucky man!

Love my sons, they keep my heart beating.