I have relapsed more times than i can even remember.i have been months clean in the past with being very happy and having money but alk it takes is that one relapse and its back to square one. So many people with wise and inspiring words .i come on here after a relapse religiously and i loosen the reigns as i go gamble free for a while stupidly thinking i have got control of the addiction.but the addiction is just waiting quietly in the background for me to have a weak moment.so im sticking to writing on here every day even if no one reads it but to look back each time i have that weak moment to deter me from this.i have lost my mrs and my home since last relapse and the most gut wrenching thing is i will not see my little princess every day. Onwards n upwards day one was yesterday and fine as no money to spend.
Until you accept that there is no controlling this addiction you will never be safe! You have to choose 'No' every single day, One Day At A Time for the rest of your life because there is no controlling this beast, just starving it!
I am sorry to hear you did not find recovery soon enough to salvage your relationship & I hope that you can really reach out to what is out there for you now so that when you do get to see your little girl you are everything she needs you to be!
Time to shut the relapse door & move on with your life - ODAAT
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