24 hours since i reached the lowest low i've had in 19 years dealing with gambling addiction depression and debt after several failed attempts today is the day i stop for ever i don't ever want to feel that low again i've been a cheat a liar and a mug for the last time and no bookie is having another penny of my hard earned cash again.
day 1 done
Well done on stopping, keep focused and you can continue to lead a happy non gambling life
Day 2 done it feels a bit like cheating because i have no money available to gamble with and have been at work all day but 48 hours and no bets yet. havent really thought about it today so thats a positive.
Today is my fourth day and no signs of slipping back into old habits so far,i already feel less stressed, this month will be tough because i wiped out all of our spare money with my last gambling binge but we'll survive,we always do i just have to learn from it this time so it doesnt happen again.
i started a new game this week i am trying to save money in any way i can whether it be a penny or £5 every bit is a little win, highlight of the weeks super scrimping so far is pulling in behind a guy who had just used the compressed air machine at the garage and topping up my tyres on his 50p so far i'm up £1.78 this week its a little thing but it keeps my mind occupied and every little bit counts tbh thats probably the best week winnings wise i had in 4 years,really puts it into perspective.
we've now got parental blocking on gambling sites at home so another thing in place to make things easier,i didnt even open my laptop last night that doesnt happen often.
Five days in a row, my OH gave me 55p for being nice all day yesterday so my total for the week is now £2.33 i'm on a roll!
Hi Darren
Well done on getting the blocks installed that's a big step already. Just take it one day at a time. The urges do come but when you don't give into them the feeling is amazing. This site is great read other people's diary's they make you determined reading other people's story's.
Good luck
six out of six no plans to do any betting today,the parental controls on home internet definitely takes away that temptation for a cheeky bet,the one that starts it all off! feeling much better the last few days i realise now it was a huge mistake to just stop taking my tablets,its weird i don't feel like they do anything but everyone around me noticed when i stopped taking them and im already hearing from people that i look and act less stressed about everything.
A week! everything seemed less complicated and stressful and all because i did what everyone has been telling me to do all this time! starting to see what a waste of time its all been the next target is im going for my record for not placing a bet which is 61 days
Great work on your 1st week 🙂
I love your new game & I completely get your OH giving you that 55p 🙂 Isn't it crazy what a few pence means in recovery? Your OH sounds very long suffering & I hope all your loved ones are aware that Gamcare offer support should they think it would help!
Why not set a few mini targets in between you could use those pennies you are saving to maybe treat you both to icecreams or a bag of chips or something as a reward?
Don't worry about someone else having control of your finances, if that's what it takes to keep us safe, that's what we do!
Keep up the good work - ODAAT
day 8 thanks ODAAT yes she is long suffering and supportive even though a lot of the time i don't deserve it,i think i will spend my pennies,maybe a dog walk at the weekend with ice lollies at the end, hope the weather stays nice or we'll have two disappointed pups and one disappointed ex gambler.
Not sure where you are but I've checked the LiePhone (23 degrees & sunny) & BBC weather (19 & sunny-ish) down here so it's looking good so far 🙂 If you like lollies, why not spend a couple of pounds on a kit & make your own! Something to keep you occupied & you can use them over & over again! Plus, the pups can have one too if you just use water & figure out how to extract the 'stick' 🙂
Nevermind worrying about what you deserve, you got yourself a keeper & removing Mr Gamble from your life will allow you to focus on proving to her you were worth sticking around for - ODAAT
nine days!!!! keeping busy with work and making it my mission each day to spend as little as i possibly can,also trying not to leave my laptop open as often is helping once i've checked emails and facebook and had a quick go on candy crush im out of there double digits tomorrow the days are flying by and checking in here each night gives me something to aim for i'd be gutted now if i broke my run of days without betting.
Day eleven today things are going well the days are flying by,OH's birthday today we're having a lazy night with munchies and 80's movies i'm starting to feel normal again.
Hi Darren,
Well done on starting a diary. This can be the start of a muvh happier life away from gambling. It changes us as a person and i don't miss the person i left behind. Keep strong, keep posting and keep ticking them days off. Keeping busy with hobbies is a great way to keep occupied.
Onwards and upwards
James
Hi Darren,
Well done on starting a diary. This can be the start of a muvh happier life away from gambling. It changes us as a person and i don't miss the person i left behind. Keep strong, keep posting and keep ticking them days off. Keeping busy with hobbies is a great way to keep occupied.
Onwards and upwards
James
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