why,why,why!!!!!!!

Hi Cheryl

Am walking along side with you every day, and am really glad it helps.

3 12 hour shifts in a row are quite gruelling, and that is without what you are going through, I think you are doing fantastic Cheryl.

Yes no word from Helen I hope she is ok and keeping away from that destruction.

Since being on this forum, a few soldiers have come and gone, female and male.

I do hope they are all ok and have found that better life where gambling has no part in it.

Sending you as always strength to get through these horrible times, You will come through this, battered bruised and totally bewildered as to why did it get to this, but you will get through this because you WANT to.

Take care and thank you for your continuing support

Stay strong.

Suzanne xx

Hi Cheryl

I have just caught up with your diary as I have been AWOL for a while. No words I can say can help you except that, whether your posts are positive or negative, this is your diary for you to write how your choose. When you are up we are here to support you, when you are down we are still here to support you (((((((Hugs))))))) for you. You will certainly get through this, you have already got through the gambling hell. So much for my 'no words I can say' eh.

You are stronger than you think so keep posting, keep reading and keep going.

Elfie x

Morning

Ty Elfie and Suzanne still here, just finished 3 12hr nights. Still scared and very tearful. Off to sleep for a bit and ty for your continued support

Cheryl xxx

Your struggle is inspirational I am only on day 6 of not gambling and I hope I have your dedication to keep posting each and every day, I cant believe there are so many of us out there with similar stories when you are online gambling its a lonely place, I always thought I was the only one somehow even though I used to see lists of names in the chat rooms I always felt I was the only one 'not in control'

Take care and keep going

Gemgem

Hi Cheryl

Hope you have managed to get some sleep after your 12hr shift.

Although tearful, you are dealing with the rubbish life throws at us in a 'normal' way. By normal, I mean - you are not gambling to numb life's downs. That is a huge plus in my book.

Keep going girl, you will get through this.

Elfie x

Evening Cheryl,

As Elfie says I hope you got some good sound sleep.

Sending you hugs ((((c))))) and strong thoughts.

Take care of yourself.

Suzanne xx

Hi

Not a hint of gambling and no urges thankfully. Wasted day otherwise as slept most of it on and off. Had a letter about the house but doesn't really give me any clues if/when they will force sale and no contact number. So not really sure why it was sent, maybe they thought I had forgotten! !!!!

Am just gonna wait til I get something clearer and with a contact number. I really want to fight this and am trying to get my head sorted.

Had a mild meltdown at work yesterday morning and boss told me to see GP and take time off, am so messed up in my head I really do not know what to do. Sometimes think trying to keep normality will help but the veneer is now obviously cracking. I hate what I have done to us all and sometimes think I deserve all of this. For some periods of the day I feel invincible and that I can beat all of this together.

Am rambling so will go and get tea ready.

Cheryl xxx

Hi Cheryl,

Just reading your diary I wish you all the strength in the world to fight what's happening to you. Be sure to know you don't deserve any of it! Keep strong, there will be light at the end of the tunnel, it may be a hard slog getting there but you will!

Take care and don't give in. Thinking of you.

Buckeroo

Your not rambling Cheryl your sharing with honesty and passion

I love how you inspire others on here myself included so please keep going

thanks tri

Stay strong Cheryl, you will get past this, and hopefully onwards to a brighter gamble free future . Take care lovely lady x

Hi Cheryl,

You are doing really well, staying strong through these uncertain times, you do not deserve to be punished, none of us do.

Sending you strength to carry on and move on.

Take care,

Suzanne xx

Morning

The ongoing support on this site is overwhelming and I want to say to you all it really is so appreciated. Day off and am really going to try POSITIVE MENTAL ATTITUDE.

Cheryl xxx

Morning Diary

Well my PMA worked and for the first time in 3 weeks I actually felt fairly normal in my day to day life. I know I have some mountains to climb to get me out of this mess caused by the gambling, but for today I will rejoice in the fact I have not and will not gamble. It's maybe been about 45 days gamble free and I need to remember that fact. Nothing will change if I don't.

Let the POSITIVE MENTAL ATTITUDE continue

Cheryl xxx

Hi Cheryl,

Am so pleased that your PMA worked and that you are beginning to feel normal, (whatever that is lol) .

You are feeling POSITIVE today, and that is great going.

Slowly but surely you are changing your life for the better, and the future we do have, the past thank goodness has gone.

I hope you have a really good day, because you certainly deserve it.

As always along side with you with all the ups and downs on this journey, but we are going up and up now.

Debt will go down, gambling only increases it, so the right choice which you have made again today is to abstain and maintain, Well done.

ENJOY the day and take care,

Suzanne xx

well done cheryl

keep that PMA going 🙂

thanks for all your support

tri xx