Hi all,
I failed miserably at my last attempt and just couldn't keep away from the online slots.
However, my situation is I think probably quite unique. I ended up signing up to a new site on my phone as I have K9 activated on my laptop to stop me.
When I started I had almost £10,000 worth of gambling debt. In a weird twist of fate I now have around £1000 of gambling debt and at one point had actually cleared the lot. I have no idea whether I was lucky or found some kind of glitch but in the last week I managed to win back pretty much everything that I have lost in the last 12 months.
However, this brings its own problems. Winning just makes me think that I can keep winning and that obviously is not the case. Financially I am now in a very good position, however I am very scared that I will continue trying to win more and end up back where I started or worse.
I have self excluded from the new site now. I did this after I realised yesterday that the slots I was winning on weren't playing ball anymore. Unfortunately not before spending the £1000 I had marked to withdraw.
The annoying thing is that even though I'm almost debt free, I am also an emotional wreck because of these games. I end up dreaming about them and everything.
Now is the time to stop for good but I know I need help. Anyone else been in a similar position?
I'm pleased to say that I have made it through today without attempting to play any online slots. It is the first day that I can say that in about 2 weeks. I have made it a lot more difficult for myself to gamble by self excluding, using K9 and today cutting up the credit cards that I was previously using to run up debts. I really hope that I can stay on the wagon this time.
Ashamed to say that I managed to gamble away some more money yesterday.
I'm starting again today, more determined than ever to be strong not only for myself but for my wife, my daughter and our unborn child.
I can't win because I can't stop!
No gambling so far today. Thought about it once or twice but managed to resist. I know this is going to be a long difficult battle but I want to beat it day by day, even hour by hour if needs be. Almost 24 hours done.
Keep calm..you're right when you say now is the time to stop. You got a lucky repreive so count your blessings and let your emotions clear and allow yourself to breathe. All the best!
Thanks for the support. I'm not quite debt free now after my fall from grace yesterday but I'm certainly in a better position than I was a week ago. Now I intend to try and clear the last bit of debt before the baby comes at Christmas through hard work and not gambling.
Start of day 2 and I will not be gambling today. Got plenty of work to get done to take my mind away from it. Here is to a second day of winning.
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