Is Gambling inherently masculine?

Hi Energized,

As a woman gambler I can honestly say it is not about making friends in a gambling arcade or bingo hall when I gambled there were loads of women in bookies. If you want to know about the female side of gambling you would need to understand for women gamblers it is not necessarily about winning but more about escaping. There are loads of women who gamble on line for that very reason to escape. Liz Karter who wrote various books on Womens gambling goes further to identify that for women it is all about negative relationships I do not disagree. Perhaps for men it is about masculinity I cannot coment on that.

Table games were another of my favourite being able to hold my own at a card table gave me a sense of power and respect. In some countries I have gambled in there are no men at card tables.

Just thought I would give you some insight into a womens reason for gambling.

take care

Its definately not masculine

Hi Energized ,

You are right about THERES NO LOVE IN GAMBLING!

In my 20 years of gambling in casinos and arcades as a women , I have experienced that most frequent visitors are men . Also in Gamblers Anonymous groups , mostly men. As one of the only women you do get more attention attending these groups , and that was for me one of the reasons to stop attending unfortunatly ..

In my opinion , after a lot of reflection in my gamble free year , is that the biggest loss is the isolation , which is in gamble addiction .

Take care and keep making those right choices !

[quote=zulu13]

Hi Energized,

As a woman gambler I can honestly say it is not about making friends in a gambling arcade or bingo hall when I gambled there were loads of women in bookies. If you want to know about the female side of gambling you would need to understand for women gamblers it is not necessarily about winning but more about escaping. There are loads of women who gamble on line for that very reason to escape. Liz Karter who wrote various books on Womens gambling goes further to identify that for women it is all about negative relationships I do not disagree. Perhaps for men it is about masculinity I cannot coment on that.

Table games were another of my favourite being able to hold my own at a card table gave me a sense of power and respect. In some countries I have gambled in there are no men at card tables.

Just thought I would give you some insight into a womens reason for gambling.

take care

Thank you for naming this female writer Zulu ; I will check her out ! Greetings

Hi all

Thank you for posting this great topic Energzied. I think it would be great for the Debates section of the forum so I've copied it there too.

Best wishes

Forum Admin

Judging by the number of women joining this forum it's definitely not gender limited although it's interesting that the female gamblers overwhelmingly cite online slots (and usually bingo as a gateway) as the problem area while men have a more varied arena and many will actively seek out physical presence at bookies shops / FOBT terminals.

I do think problem gambling is on the rise in females and that can only continue all the time the industry is given free rein in its cynical targeting of women on daytime TV.

An interesting debate Energised.

Is there a more sensible gender when considering gambling? Based on what Ive seen in a limited number of places, maybe its fair to say that its mainly men gambling on sport, horses and dogs.

The slot machines were my poison and I would say an increasing number of women but slightly more men. It could be evenly balanced there though. Without wanting to sound sexist or patronising maybe more women play slots introduced through a bingo connection.

Ive never played bingo but it seems a better social atmosphere than the gambling I did...maybe Im wrong but everything would be a better social atmosphere than arcades and bookies

I dont judge women and men in that sense...everyone is an individual. Would it be helpful to discuss why one gender may be less prone to gambling?? Maybe there are far less women overall....I dont really know

Whats more important is there is no real love or social life in the gambling Ive seen. I didnt ever like the atmosphere in arcades or bookies but the draw of the machines was enough. I am an isolation gambler and I have to say I dont like other gamblers when in the dens. I got uncomfortable and stressed if someone stood too close. The small talk is the most false and banal thing Ive ever experienced. Its not really a chat....... more like two people wary of each other weighing up the immediate environment.....dont come near my collect button though 🙂

Someone should have handed me a mirror because I probably looked like the saddest person in there. I didnt play for masculinity and I think the gambling feeling, the so called buzz and wanting to escape affects both genders in the same chemical way

There was always the atmosphere that if someone had thrown some money in the middle of the room everyone would pounce on it. Nobody really likes other people having a better experience. I wont call it winning because I didnt see any real winners in there.

I saw the false banter. The banter between gamblers and bookie staff made me cringe. The man bashing the roulette screen, The woman telling me she was spending all her rent in depressed tones....a cry for help if ever I heard one.

The woman whooping that she had won but then immediately saying she had fed three times the amount in for the jackpot...like she had to tell someone the truth even though she didnt want help

The couples playing together in hushed and depressed tones.

The big boys and girls club talking about massive losses like it was a badge of honour to join their club. The talk was always that it was a losing game but they were resigned to it as if it was normal and part of life in some way. Drug addicts do this as well where they create an exclusivity of acceptance as if they are above others and in the know. The reality is clearly the opposite

The man telling me he was off on holiday right now with the taxi coming. Proceeds to tell me about an exotic holiday, leaves then he sheepishly sneaks back in an hour later. I nodded along to humour them but its delusional nonsense to justify their gambling and cover any embarrassment being stood there

A long history of people being cleaned out then walking around bothering others and trying to play the machines through them. Then they have all the advice about looking at coin holders inside 🙁 Cleaned out skint but with all the "expert" advice for others....horrendous! The thought of those people trying to tap me for money brings back awful memories...gambling dens...dens of iniquity........ for thats what they are!

Ive been pickpocketed in a city arcade as they are a focus for people hanging around and crime

So there is no love really. They dont really want to know each other and when I see a face I recognise from the arcade in town they just look sad really. I tried getting one guy to see the light but he wasnt listening and he wasnt interested so I dont bother now. I mentioned it to one woman and she just got extremely angry with me.

Its a completely false world. You are exactly right in that there is no love, no real emotion and no real friendship. I found they were essentially loners with major issues like I had. I still have issues but I wont ever resolve them by gambling.

To me its clear that these people wanted acceptance/friends/ love but at the same time couldnt handle it. That was me and I saw many others like me in there, I wanted real emotion and real love but I was never going to get it in those places and I knew that really. The overwhelming feeling was I wanted a machine to show me some love and I didnt really like people any more. People had hurt me and the truth is I wanted a machine to hurt me and punish me as a cry for help. Theres the rub. I wanted both love and cruelty from a machine to give me any emotion beyond numb

Thats the crazy thing brought out in counselling to show how complex the addiction is

Best wishes to everyone on the forum

Great post, JD.

Shows the seedy reality of the places gambling bosses are trying desperately to rebrand as 'hubs of the community'.

Bingo has always been firmly positioned as a female social thing which makes it all the more scandalous that the industry is able to use this to aggressively exploit markets they have never before had a chance of reaching via the medium of daytime TV.

Gambling isn't inherently masculine.

For historical reasons, gambling has always been a male domain. Partly because men have historically controlled the money flow. Bookies therefore became extremely male dominated places and they continue to be so now.

With the advent of online gambling and greater pay parity, it's clear a lot more women are gambling.

I am fairly sure that risk taking is linked with higher testosterone and therefore males. But I look at my own gambling, mindlessly playing slots, and I don't think of that as genuine risk taking. Not in the James Bond sense. In fact quite the opposite, it was utterly mundane. It's almost risk-taking but that gives gambling addicts too much credit. Risk taking involves some kind of objective risk-analysis. Recklessness is more apt and far less s-exy.

Addiction is the same, whether it's heroine or alcohol. It's all about escaping from the internal struggle. It's the same drivers as with overeating or being a shopoholic.

You are so right cardhue about the utterly mundane aspect of machines.

I know what you mean about it being more mindless and wreckless than any sort of objective risk analysis.

Its the most pathetic thing to have to explain and theres nothing to take even a slither of credit for. I cant even say I put it all on red...not that gambling is acceptable in any way...but I wasnt even prepared to take that sort of risk...you know what I mean...... but a spin every 5 seconds adds up to thousands....crazy crazy addicted behaviour

I was feeding those coins in for some form of escape. Its quick and I could zone out...I still cant fully explain why I would throw away much needed money on those things.

I dont like the way James Bond films (for example) promote a s**y image of casinos but what you say is spot on. I dont know what I was doing stood feeding coins into a slot like a zombie. There wasnt really any calculation going on I still liken it to an instant shot in the vein or how alcoholics like to get drunk as quickly as possible. It was just something to do that seemed more attractive than anything else to do in town.

I wont say any more about risk as Im just digging a hole for myself. I know exactly what you are getting at though.

Best wishes to everyone on the forum