Other addictions - good and bad

I would say very similar to my experience and personality I have always had an addictive personality Gym fashion work boxing and I always have to win but obviously as a gambler we never win the system is set up for us to lose and we have to realise that ! It's just a shame Again

Its really about holes and empty spaces in our souls. we are always trying to make ourselves feel better and addiction to pleasure sensations and chemicals is always waiting to get us.

Im a dreamer...I dream a lot and dont act on it so I escape from life in that sense.

We are all on a scale of addiction to various things. I used to buy things to make me feel something and at one stage I was a shopaholic. Over time I realised it didnt make me any happier.

I have just bought a new phone but when I was gambling the drive to gamble was far stronger than wanting possessions like a car or a phone.

We are all searching for something and unfortunately the gambling dens grew up realising that they were on to something that is deep within human nature.

I dont actually like too many plans or too much choice. I have suffered from a nervous anxiety all my life. At times I thought I was a confident good looking person but there is something within me that has been hurt in the past...bullied at school or whatever

We crave certain things as we are essentially chemicals and brain neurons. What we need is true love and a productive life. Many people including me seem saddened and even angry by the sham drudgery of life and paying our way. Gambling on machines was always an escape for me and I became highly addicted. It wasnt about Jackpots and it was more about a cry for help.

I could be stood in a seaside resort and slot machines were the only thing that I really wanted to do. They know they have tapped into something in the Human psyche that drove us to gamble like lab rats, lemmings or whatever you want to call it.

My story is I ended up unemployed and alone after years of living with a false vanity and fly by night attitude. I have difficulty seeing an accepting reality and maybe those traits are in compulsive gamblers. I think we can be slighty different but its not all our fault. Maybe we are looking for something in life that isnt really there...I do know that gambling was acting like a shot in the vein. I was playing those slots because I was driven to play them for the active feelings at the time. I do realise now that the money was down the list of priorities which seems crazy to say when its essential food money thats being put in. Thats addiction for you.

Anyway its infinately better gamble free. Im not saying Im in paradise but Im beginning to see what really matters in life

Best wishes to everyone on the forum

So refreshing to read that and again so similar to myself as I'm sure it will be to others on. Even without knowing you I can totally relate to you and the ups and downs you've had in life even now whilst I'm at rock bottom I still don't regret that fact I've done what I've done and that is purely down to the fact that I believe it will make me into a stronger person as all the difficult times in my life have. I hope the hard times are behind you and you continue to feel better about things and have a much better outlook on your improving future. Nobody said life is easy and our experiences make us who we are we just have to know which ones to learn from the most

Amen my friend!

I've never managed to be addicted to the 'good things' like exercise. I smoked, gave up, started again. Think I've stopped now but I vape instead(...). Got a problem with alcohol. Need to work on that but one thing at a time...

I do, however, tend to get really into a hobby for weeks or months, then move onto another one. I think it is about me wanting to get better at something, learn something new. Honestly, that's how I felt about gambling. It was kind of a nice feeling knowing that I had 'learned how to play Blackjack'. Felt a bit clever when I was winning. Obviously I feel pretty stupid now, 10 years down the line and hugely in debt.

I read something interesting about addiction a few months back. The study suggested that, actually, addiction (in this case drugs) had less to do with chemical stimulators in the brain and was actually to do with whether someone had a good support network of friends. The bigger your circle of 'real' friends, the less likely you were to become addicted, or relapse, even with heroin.

I don't know if it is coincidence or not but my 10 year period of problem gambling has coincided with me moving around fairly regularly for work. In the last 10 years I have lived in 3 different countries, moved job 3 different times. I still think that I have friends but there is always a sense that this is a little transitory (is that a word?). And even though my job is well paying, I am a bit bored with it. I don't have the same passion for it as I had before.

Could be so many reasons for these things, and I'm certainly not suggesting that people here don't have a good support network or friends, but your post just made me think about that.

Hi 

My addictions and obsessions were all consuming.

By understanding that the addictions and obsessions only indicated how emotionally vulnerable I was.

Where do you draw the line between over obsessive and having balance in your life.

Also with the addictions and obsessions was the risk taking.

My risk taking indciated that I did not respect or love my self.

The higher the levels of fears of me stopped me from having healthy emotional intimacy with other people.

I asked my wife one day what was love.

Her opinion love is giving of my self unconditionally.

That was an eye opener fro me.

Once in the recovery program I found that the wording good or bad was not healthy for me and it sounded  like I was making judgements on my self and others.

My wording in my recovery is what is healthy and what is unhealthy.

I tend to exchange my unhealthy habits in to healthy habits.

That helps me become amuch healthier person.

Gambling for me is an healthy habit, just for today I do not gamble. My healthy choice.

Smoking for me is an healthy habit, just for today I do not smoke. My healthy choice.

Getting drunk for me is an healthy habit, just for today I do not get drunk. My healthy choice.

Drinking tea or coffee for me is an healthy habit, just for today I do not get drink tea or coffee . My healthy choice.

The words I use indicate how much I value my self and others.

Only when I respect my self can I respect other people.

Only when I love my self can I love other people.

Only when I am honest with my self can I be honest with other people.

How did I know that I had been through deep trauma in my life for sure.

I had very little recall of memories in my life.

My legs use to twitch on their own when crossed.

Sadly as a teenager I tried to take my own life.

It was only after along period in the recovery program and after 11 counsellors that the memory of that event came fully to my conscious mind.

So for me the addiction was just the symptoms of how emotionally vulnerable I was.

Only once I abstain from my unhealthy habits could I heal the hurt inner child in me.

All the time I was hurting my self through my addictions I could not even start to heal my hurt inner child in me.

Love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham