My father has destroyed my family

My family thinks that my father is a gambling addict. He was an alcoholic while I was a teenager and he made our lives hell. That seemed to subside by my late-teens but he has also been a compulsive liar for as long as I can remember. I wonder whether he is just a terrible person.

He has been lying, borrowing and stealing money from myself, family members, and even neighbours for a long time; probably longer than my family knows. The situation has reached a tipping point because we discovered last week that he has been stealing money from my 91 year old grandfather’s bank account. Not only that, but he has been emotionally abusing him: he secretly threatened my grandfather that he would have nothing to do with him if he checked his own bank account! He didn’t want him to see that he had been stealing money with his bank card. My grandfather had suspicions but was too scared to tell anyone. He has stolen at least £4,000 in the last two months alone.

What makes the situation even worse is that our grandfather only just recently moved in with us because he is trying to sell off his house to pay off my father’s debts; my father borrowed thousands of pounds from my grandfather’s friends and my mother’s old friends and never paid them back. How did he achieve this? He told me that he knows he has a knack for convincing people to give him what he wants. Some of these old friends accused my whole family of being involved with a scam and even flattened my sister’s car tires and cut wires connected to our old house.

I also discovered that my father had been borrowing thousands of pounds from my grandfather and claiming that it was for me while I was in university a few years ago. I never saw a single penny of it. In fact, I was giving my father hundreds of pounds from my student loan because he begged me that he had debts. He even pretended that he was in jail once to convince me to part with a few hundred pounds.

All of this is just the tip of the iceberg. He is still in our house. He has threatened to cut my mother off from his benefits if he is forced to leave. My grandfather needs someone to look after him, especially with personal things like helping him shower and feels like he needs my father, even though he has been emotionally abusing him. It sickens me to see my father walk around the house like he has done nothing wrong. He shows no remorse. What can I do?

Thank you for reading all this.