Day 0

Thanks jayjay75 I hope it isn't too late for me. It is just finding the reason behind it and tackling it head on!!

I wonder if we ever will be free from the demon or if we are going to be battling for ever and a day with it?

I'm glad your taking the right steps forward too. It just feels for me that I take three forward and twenty back!! I have been gambling now for three years on and off and within that time I have built up quite a bit of debt but I always paid that debt back. But to think of what I could've done with that money instead drives me insane! Hope you continue well on your road x

Hi Btapp I'm so sorry to hear about your relapse and i know how disappointed you must be feeling. I was gamble free for 128 days and relapsed on Saturday and was an emotional wreck afterwards. I like you will get counselling to find out what drives us to be compulsive gamblers. All I can say to you is we must keep fighting this as it is no way to live and how much happier and calmer life is without the stress of sitting losing money on a machine. I'm sure in time the battle will be less intense. I wish you all the best in your journey and keep strong honey. Gamblock helped me for 128 days to stay gamble free but for some reason it didn't block the casino websites at the weekend. It is now working again and i feel a lot safer. It might be worth looking into.

So day 0 came back, again. Today is day 0. Despite the counselling I have still gambled.. Have only just started it however and so far it is helping me change my mindset. The issues remain that we get caught up in the fantasy world the companies create for us. For me this addiction is the gambling nut, and I need to crack it. I feel that tonight I have managed to do this. I sat down and wrote a list of what makes me sad, and sure enough I realised something which makes me want money, to help my dad to give up work as he is ill but self employed. I have an addictive personality and by no means am I blaming his illness but I have always wanted to tell him it's ok he doesn't need to work anymore... Oh to dream!

But I also wrote a list of what makes me happy and sure enough after feeling so down and low I felt positive, some what chipper!! I felt like the light was there in the tunnel alongside me and guiding me out. I have an overdraft which my partner doesn't know about and I will be out of this in five months time but I can't tell him for reasons previously explained. I don't enjoy lieing to him but it's the best, we still are comfortable with the money I get a month minus paying off the secret debt!

I wish everyone faith in cracking their own gambling nuts and being free of this. Don't forget they want you to feel alone and sad, that's when you will keep putting that money in their pockets..

The last every day 0.