Deeper hole

FreeOfTroubles wrote:

OP,

Gamcare is funded by the gambling industry, I wouldn't take their advice for anything. You are doing well for insisting on getting support in text instead of talking over the phone, I have stopped gambling without going to a single GA meeting, GA is useless for many people - it's okay to be blunt and speak the truth, the thing is I'm concerned (really concerned unlike Gamcare) that posts like mine will get flagged for speaking the truth in here, and that's what annoying me, because people like us can help you see the light and make a better future, so please rely only on yourself and do your own due diligence when someone is giving you an advice (including an advice from me).

Thanks!

Hello FreeOFTroubles,

You can find information about our funding here:

"GamCare receives grants through voluntary funding arrangements managed by the GambleAware (formerly the Responsible Gambling Trust). ...As an independent national charity funded by donations from the gambling industry and others, GambleAware funds education, prevention and treatment services across England, Scotland and Wales and commissions research to broaden public understanding of gambling-related harm. GambleAware grants funding to several treatment providers, including Gordon Moody Association and CNWL National Problem Gambling Clinic". https://www.gamcare.org.uk/about-us/donations-and-funding

For people who prefer texting to talking, our Netline is available: https://www.gamcare.org.uk/frontline-services/netline

You might also be interested in our self-help resources: https://www.gamcare.org.uk/get-advice/self-help-resources

Take care,

Forum admin.

Forum admin wrote:

You might also be interested in our self-help resources: https://www.gamcare.org.uk/get-advice/self-help-resources

Thanks for sharing this link, Forum Admin ... now please take no offense at what I'm saying, but gambling is fast, it's full of adrenaline, people like the rush, they are impatient, of course they need ot build a better person out of their personality, but honestly - and no offense - I looked at this link with resources.

You are providing tools that belong to 1990, we are in 2018 ... people need FAST Tools, something that works, and fast ... you remind me of the current pharmaceutical industry trying to say that chemo is the only cure for cancer ... well, chemo is not a cure, and chemo kills people more than cancer does - the smart people look at cannabis as alternative or at least as a consideration for a better way to survive ... chemo hasn't proven itself since 1970s or even earlier. It's not a cure.

And this link is NOT a solution for gamblers who need a fast resolution.

Good tools are:

1) Self Exclusion.
2) Handing over control over finance.
3) Using Monzo as a bank account because they block gambling transactions.
4) Moving your funds to another country or to a fixed savings account that cannot be opened.

All of these are FAST solutions that will ARREST THE ADDICTION ... with gambling addiciton the only solution is to arrest the addiction, and once the addict has no means of gambling - then he/she won't be able to gamble.

I am not underestimating the resources you have there (or maybe I do), but have you seen the "Access, Time and Money worksheet" you have there? You are telling people "work out how to reduce access to gambling" ... why are you calling it "reduce" and why are you not encouraging people, all these broken souls, to simply self-exclude? I am looking at your site and I barely see any reference from your team to self-exclusion.

There is an elephant in the gambler's mind and you need to treat it, but aspirine is not going to do the job, you need a proper vaccination to kill it, that's how you treat problems.

Onepunchjamoo wrote: Free of troubles, THANK YOU. I'm glad you were able to stop without GA or anything, I hope I'm able to do the same. I hope you comment like this regularly and they don't get flagged. I do think just talking on here and reading other peoples stories will slowly help me and even if it doesn't, it helps in the moment when I mess up. I'm feeling positive and hopefully I can tell people how I stopped without GA one day too.

Hi again Onepunch,

I'm glad to hear you're feeling positive, but with gambling addiction it's not about how you feel, at least from my experience as someone who hasn't placed a bet for a very long time.

It's not about feeling, it's not about GA, it's about you, and it's about ARRESTING YOUR ADDICTION.

You said talking in here "helps in the moment when I mess up" - I would bet it help but it's very limited, and so is Gamcare phone calls.

Please try to arrest your addiction, there is no other way, you have to arrest it, like a arresting a bad demon, put walls and bricks and fences so you won't be able to even get near it.

Now you said you "mess up" - how does it happen in practice? Where do you mess up? Is it online? Offline? Do you go to shops? How exactly do you "mess up"?

If you could explain to me how you "mess up" I can offer you a better guidance how to arrest your addiction, and once you do so, you would be able to be free of gambling at least temporarily, and that's what your body, soul and mind - that's what they all need.

But you must do so, arrest your addiction, usually it's done by self-exclusion, but if you could elaborate and explain how exactly you "mess up" it would be easier to give you guidance what you should really do to make a better for you not only today but tomorrow, with higher chances of making it a really better day for you.

Looking forward to hear back from you.

You've got it bang on 'freeoftroubles', about arresting the addiction. That's exactly how I stopped in May and I've been great since.

I've tried to offer jamoo this advice but he only takes from the advice he wants to hear because he's not ready to stop yet.

On one thread there was an absolute ton of sound advice from caring people and he said near the end the best piece of advice he got was someone saying simply
'you'll get there'
Like I said, he just takes advice he wants to hear which enables him to keep gambling. He does however seem to like the way you post so maybe you'll be the one he finally listens too, I hope so, for his own sake before he truly does dig a 'deeper hole'.

You seem like a clever person free of troubles.
I disagree about the feelings part though. If I can change my attitude and how I feel then I won't put everything on the line. If I appreciate my job, what I earn, what I have and I feel good because things could be worse, then I believe it will help me a lot.

I rarely go bookies because there's been two occasions I've been in trouble with police when I've lost and assaulted staff or broke a machine so I mostly gamble on my phone to avoid that, I usually gamble at work on my break but I did that last week then went home when I lost and very nearly lost my job so I'm going to stop doing it at work as well.

Promixo is right, I like what you have to say but I don't think I'm ready to arrest my addiction just yet.

I also want to thank the admin for the links, I haven't looked at them yet but I will.

Thanks guys, still feeling good 🙂

I hope free from troubles is a real person who has a real gambling problem and not just someone trying to sell the monzo product I sincerely do but i have my doubts. If they are still here writing and trying to help in a years time will be seen. Monzo card is wrong for pweople with a gambling problem as it allows large cash withdrawels and takes three percent of those cash withdrawels I think monzo is profiting from people who gamble in bookies as a last resort. Have a look for yourself one punch seems a bit dodgy to me. Only letting u have cash withdrawells and no online gambling when if you go to a bookie and withdrawell more than two hundred they take three percent every transaction for the privalidge.....but what do I know adam

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adam123 wrote:

I hope free from troubles is a real person who has a real gambling problem and not just someone trying to sell the monzo product I sincerely do but i have my doubts. If they are still here writing and trying to help in a years time will be seen. Monzo card is wrong for pweople with a gambling problem as it allows large cash withdrawels and takes three percent of those cash withdrawels I think monzo is profiting from people who gamble in bookies as a last resort. Have a look for yourself one punch seems a bit dodgy to me. Only letting u have cash withdrawells and no online gambling when if you go to a bookie and withdrawell more than two hundred they take three percent every transaction for the privalidge.....but what do I know adam

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Monzo is not the ultimate solution, definitely not, but it's a good practical solution for those who need. I don't work for them and I don't care whether people would use them or not. It's none of my interest.

I'd like OP to arrest his addiction because I know it's good for him but he is not ready yet to do it. That's what I'd like to speak to him about, please don't take the Monzo thread too hard if you don't like it, I only offered it as a solution fo those who find it useful, it's definitely a good solution but it's not the ultimate one.

Onepunchjamoo wrote: Promixo is right, I like what you have to say but I don't think I'm ready to arrest my addiction just yet.

That's wrong in my opinion, but I cannot make choices for you in life, you make your own choices eventually.

Can I ask why do you feel you are not ready to arrest your addiction yet?

• Did you gain any benefit, any benefit whatsoever from gambling in your phone whilst in breaks in your job?
• Don't you think you are using your spare time to lose money you hard for? If so what go and work in a job, if you are going to spend that money through your phone?
• Can you try to self-exclude yourself if not permanently then for 1 month or you know what - just 1 week - self exclude yourself please for 1 week from the website you're using through your phone, just 1 week - please ... can you please do it and then let us know how does it feel?

Andwhen u say self exclusion do u mean gamstop? Because in my opinion that's the only way that works and that's only just come in. I think ur suggestions are limited only because I don't think u are a compulsive gambler, ie someone who will do anything to gamble. I went from online gambling, to casinos to bookies to pubs one by one excluding to the point where I was still gambling in pubs but couldn't self exclude from them!!!!. What do I do now I haven't gone to a pub for 90 days and I haven't gambled. How will monzo card stop me from taking out lots and lots of cash and spending it on slot machines I pubs. It wont. Gamstop iz exactly the same without the banking charges involved from monzo.

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I win £1100 on my lunch break so once so yeah lol.
I understand why arresting it helps but with me, if I stop myself one way I'll find another way.. I'm a dangerous person when I'm desperate so I don't want to make myself desperate by blocking myself instantly.
I have three bank accounts, that's enough lol I have no interest in any special cards or anything so the Monzo thing didn't bother me I just ignored it.
I believe with a change of attitude I'll be ok.

adam123 wrote:

Andwhen u say self exclusion do u mean gamstop? Because in my opinion that's the only way that works and that's only just come in. I think ur suggestions are limited only because I don't think u are a compulsive gambler, ie someone who will do anything to gamble. I went from online gambling, to casinos to bookies to pubs one by one excluding to the point where I was still gambling in pubs but couldn't self exclude from them!!!!. What do I do now I haven't gone to a pub for 90 days and I haven't gambled. How will monzo card stop me from taking out lots and lots of cash and spending it on slot machines I pubs. It wont. Gamstop iz exactly the same without the banking charges involved from monzo.

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Gamstop is 1 option but I wasn't referring only to it ... If you don't believe me I was a compulsive gambler that's fine, but I was, I really was, I know what's going on through your head because I was on the same boat once.

For me the buzz might have been different than yours, I was betting on sports, only on sports, and mainly online, I wasn't hooked into slot machines (aka FOBTs) and it sounds like that's what's giving you the buzz because pubs don't allow you to bet on sports, they only have slot machines.

You are once again mentioning Monzo, forget about Monzo for a second - I am sure all the people here want to get to the ultimate destination, so you asked how to get there -

• Self Exclusion and Gamstop are very effective tools but they are not enough in your case
• You need to "control" your finances in a way that you won't be able to gamble, so if Monzo is not talking to you - then you need to have less access to cash.
• How do you do it? Put your hard earned money in a fixed deposit that cannot be opened before the maturity date, or open a bank account overseas in Europe and transfer your money there without having a debit/credit card to that account so you won't have immediate access to this cash - that's how you arrest the addiction, you don't get instant access to your cash.
• You can also used a spouse or someone you trust to control your finances on your behalf, it might be one of the only solutions you can go with at the moment, but at least you won't spend your money on gambling.
• Being self-excluded, and without proper cash access - would ensure you cannot bet anymore.

Without cash - you won't go to the bookies, you won't go to the pubs, and you won't go to casinos, because you would have no cash to play with.

But this needs to come from you, if you truly can fulfill these steps - you won't have any trouble with gambling in the very near future - in the long run - only time will tell, but that's what people really need - to not have access to the "disease" in the first place.

Onepunchjamoo wrote: I win £1100 on my lunch break so once so yeah lol. I understand why arresting it helps but with me, if I stop myself one way I'll find another way.. I'm a dangerous person when I'm desperate so I don't want to make myself desperate by blocking myself instantly. I have three bank accounts, that's enough lol I have no interest in any special cards or anything so the Monzo thing didn't bother me I just ignored it. I believe with a change of attitude I'll be ok.

It's your mind playing these games with you, all I can say is don't listen to your mind, but you seem to be okay with the current situation, I am just not sure for how long this will last.

Ok, I give all my wages to my parents each month that's how ive done it for a couple of years and it seems to work. I just have a five hundred pound overdraft that gets me in trouble so over past three months I've not gone to town with my card just taken twenty pounds cash. Its a difficult thing to have to resort to but I a compulsive gambler and my mind doesn't often have the correct ideas.

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I've tried my wages going to other people but it's pointless because if I ask for my money they're just going to give it to me.. it delays it my a very tiny margin.

Onepunchjamoo wrote: I've tried my wages going to other people but it's pointless because if I ask for my money they're just going to give it to me.. it delays it my a very tiny margin.

You need to want to stop so badly in order to actually do what's good for you, don't treat this as a burden or as a task such as ticking a box in a form, you are not doing this for anyone but yourself.

If leaving your finance with other people is not your thing then don't do it, but find something that does help you ... self-exclusion is 100% must for anyone who wants to stop gambling.

If you don't self-exclude yourself then your only other option in my opinion is to get to want to do it some day, hopefully sooner than later.