Elo everyone,
First time seeking help for gambling!
I've been diagnosed with generalised anxiety, social anxiety and mental obsessive compulsion disorder. Ive taken every drug under the sun, off the street and to the pharmaceutical thugs!
Im 29 and Ive struggled with it since I can consciously remember, the gambling lately has increased exponentially with the online slots. I feel that Im forunate and sincere to people who have a stronger habit to gamble, but Im gambling heavily lately.
Ive lost about 5 jobs in 2 years with mental health and I am struggling with the impulse to play online games. I know that they are just programmed to spit out random numbers and I'll never win but the slots alleviate my anxiety in that moment. I feel transfixed!
Im off drugs but drink quite a bit and this leads me to gamble. My family and friends are aware but my personality masks it all. So theres know one to speak to.
The internet is a dark place but philosophically where the is dark, there must be light, any help or communication would be great.
Liam
Hello Liam, well done for joining up, it's a good start!
I think there's deffinatly a link between mental health and gambling, I suffer depression and anxiety and when I first started gambling I actually believed it was helping untill it totally took over and I was constantly loosing then it made my problems 100x worse. That feeling you get after loosing so much was getting unbearable, the guilt and deppression was worse then anything I felt before gambling.
It sounds like you'd really benefit from some counselling, also stay on here and read as much as you can, other peoples stories will give you lots of tips and also make you see your not alone in this! Good luck
Hi Liam and Welcome.
I have experienced anxiety and the black dog of depression all my known life. Its definately linked to gambling and perhaps the way many compulsive gamblers are wired.
Instead of reaching for drink or other drugs, I found gambling was what I reached for to soothe and escape. It was my drug of choice because I do believe it acts like a substance on us. Yes I said soothe because when first starting to play it was a compulsion then a shot in the vein when the reel spun for the first time. It was almost like a sigh of relief that I was back playing as the dopamine or whatever brain chemicals took hold.
I could hold a job for only so long until depression based on low self esteem took over. To be fair many depressives are deep thinkers and I should have had more ambition than to do those jobs anyway. The jobs were wrong because Ive had no direction in life which is something Im working on changing
I still experience dark episodes which can last a long time. However I sought recovery from gambling as it obviously wasnt the answer and just made things worse. We end up in a cycle where the two play off each other with the thought that we are going to win it all back slowly or quickly. However we were ignoring the odds from the start
I think a lot of people feel down but some mask it better than others
Best wishes from everyone on the forum
The anxiety and low self esteem are almost certainly linked in my case. When gambling I can escape/ease these feelings for a while but always end up in a place much darker than the one I started at. I’ve spent far too long blocking out the real world with this monetary obsession. There’s this false notion that if I beef my bank account up through gambling that all my problems will be solved. I’ve been stuck in a cycle of getting back on my feet only to whack myself back down harder than the last time. It’s repetitive and so so tiresome, I don’t fully understand why I do it to myself. We are all better than this, it has to stop. I can’t ever gamble again, I need to embrace that fact.
Hello Liam,
I wonder if you've looked into getting a talking treatment on the NHS. You might be aware that the National Problem Gambling Clinic can offer Cognitive Behavioural Therapy to support recovery from problem gambling. As you've mentioned that you're diagnosed with anxiety and OCD, and that alcohol is an issue for you too, it could be useful to talk with your GP about what local services could be available to you to help you with managing these challenges. Here is a link to a couple webpages about the National Problem Gambling Clinic:
https://www.cnwl.nhs.uk/cnwl-national-problem-gambling-clinic/
https://www.cnwl.nhs.uk/cnwl-national-problem-gambling-clinic/refer/
You're welcome to call our freephone 0808 8020 133 if you'd like to chat with one of our advisers about your recovery or the support that is available.
Take care,
Forum admin.
liam, You certainly are understood by me and many others. But then there is the personal challenge that we all have. So great that you are here and doing something different on the internet. We can get obcessive compulsive about thing that are better for us and then trim it back to less obcessive. At least some things benifit us, unlike gambling. Gambling on line or in casinos... machines are designed to addict people and get them to play until extinction/exhaustion of funds and energy. tara
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