hi, im a new member, last sunday my 18 year old lad, lovely boy, no interest in bookies etc, in college and doing well in sport, broke down. in the last week he had taken 3000 out of his building society acct to fund roulette, and in total in a few weeks has lost 8000.we are very worried, to be honest its a nightmare, we know watch hil like a hawk, we control his money and if i find 50p extra in his pocket we assume hes back on the machines,he had 9200 in his acct saved since birth, and now nearly all gone like that.ANY advice and could i take B*****d to court etc for encouraging reckless gambling etc, thanks
Hello,
Firstly i'm sorry to hear that you have found out your son has gambled alot of money. I understand it will have upset you but you have done the right thing in coming here for help.
I suggest you sit down with him and get him to ring the national self exclusion scheme on 0800 294 2060. You can self exclude him from as many bookmakers as you like. This will mean that he will no longer be able to go in any of the bookies he bans himself from. This should be the first step so that it never happens again. I know he is an adult but id suggest controlling his finances like debit cards and giving him an allowance. With no debit card he wont be able to go online and gamble and having limited cash on him will mean if he does try and find a way to gamble he wont be able to do much damage.
I'm sorry to say but the money is gone. Taking the bookmaker to court and trying to reclaim the money back will unlikely happen. If he was underage or self excluded then maybe you would have a case. It's entirely upto if you want to try i just cant see them doing anything about it.
The positives you and your son could take out of this is that he came to you early on and admitted he messed up. He could of continued to hide it from you and his addiction may of got worse. This may of started him to lose more money and do things like steal to fund his addiction. Alot of money has been lost but anyone on here will tell you that them not stopping gambling has made there early losses look like a slight mark on the bigger picture.
He needs to be commited to stopping too so it's important he understand what needs doing. There is help for him in terms of free 1-1 counselling, ring gamcare and get something arranged if you both think it will help.
Again sorry for what you are going through and i hope ny advice helps. All the best.
Embracing
Hi this is becoming a very common story. There are many companies encouraging students to supplement their income. Call gamcare and get some advice. Controlling finances best way but difficult from a distance. GA meetings, gamanon for you. There may be counsellor on site at uni. This is progressive and without complete transparency and willingness from your son can get worse. I found confrontations just led to secrecy. Get some real help. The money is gone. Ask lots of questions here too.
Just sent a copy of this to the wife. As a cg it would totally destroy me if this was my son. Good luck - get him help now,
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