Need advice

Hello @Sunshine55,

Welcome to the GamCare forum; I'm really glad you have joined.

I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling so low at the moment. I can hear that you really care about your brother but it is so hard for you when he is continuing to gamble and not being honest with you.

You're welcome to pass on our contact information to your brother; we're here 24 hours on 0808 8020 133, on Netline, on WhatsApp and on Facebook, and we could have a chat with him about his gambling and discuss with him various options which can help. 

Even if he is not ready to contact us yet, he will know that support is available. He might like to have a look at our recovery stories; this may give him hope that there is a way out of his gambling addiction.

It is also really important to consider your own wellbeing and to practise self-care. You might like to have a look at Mind; they have various ideas for how you can look after yourself and can direct you to support if you are feeling low. I would also encourage you to reach out to any other family or friends that you have for support.

You are also very welcome to contact us at any time; you can speak one to one with an advisor who can offer support and discuss some options which could help. You are never alone in this; there is always someone you can talk to here.

You can also access free structured support with one of our practitioners, who specialise in supporting people affected by someone else's gambling; we can refer you for this if this is something you are interested in.

GamAnon hold group supportive meetings for loved ones of someone with a gambling problem, both in person and through Zoom. 

GamFam can offer various support, such as through their GRA5P programme. 

BeGambleAware have information on looking out for you when affected by someone else's gambling.

You might also like to have a look at our group chatroom.

Please keep posting; we are here for you.

Best wishes,

Sophie

Forum Admin

@forum-admin 

Hi Sophie

Thank you so much for your reply. I had a bad night unable to sleep. My brother is avoiding talking to me. He wants to avoid a conversation about gambling. I am too tired to talk so am going to take time for myself and relax. I do want to talk to him but I feel like everything I do to help him, becomes a form of enabling him. 

Thank for the info about support. I am going to open up to my close friends. I have been keeping my feelings hidden

Again, thanks. I am feeling worried but a little less alone

The thing is he needs to want to stop. Does he want to stop and feels embarrased talking about it. I cant talk to anyone i do sometimes very rarely though. None of my friends know. Kept it hidden for 20 years. If he cant talk about, write him a letter telling him u there to support him with stopping. On the letter tell him he can write back to u rather than speaking about it. Its very hard to talk about it. Theres lots of measures to put in place when hes ready to deal with it. But you cant do it for him you can support him. At one point he will rock bottom and this maynnot be yet.