New beginning

Hi All,

first post and first time on here, where can i start? From the age of 13 the highlight of the seaside were the coin pusher machines, from. That young age i was already thinking how to get money to play the pusher machines, at the age of 13/14/15 i would steal money from my fathers wallet to play fruit machines in a ice rink which one one asks for ID.

i would go on my own walk 20 mins as a 13 year old and pay to go in to the ice skating centre JUST to play on the fruit machines.

this slowly started decreeing my downfall. At the age of 16 i went to study abroad for a year. All the money people gave me for spending i gambled before i left. While i was abroad - i went to a casino and lost all my maintenance money for the year. I then had to return to the uk.

this is just the beginning , when i came back aged 16 i could go in to bookies and they would not ask for ID. I would steel money from my father - defraud people scam people just to go to play the FOBTS - i sold my mothers beloved gold worth 30k for 2k just so i can play on the FOBTS.

At this age of 16 is when i made my most stupidest mistake … i used my mothers credit card (20k limit) … maxed it out online in 3 minutes… played blackjack 500£ bet lost double lost double lost double lost boom 20k gone… and u know what not even a check to see if everything is okay.. how can a bank allow these transactions so swiftly like instant.

knowing the mess i got in to i came clean to my family ( regarding the 20k) they helped me - they told me i will have to pay it which i was okay with as now i was 18 and going in to full time work , i started working while i was studying - not paying nothing to the debt, i would get paid at midnight and say i need to leave work due to a emergency and go straight to the casino with my wages and loose it all.

this CONTINUED for 9 YEARS - during the time i have borrowed and borrowed from family friends co wokers. At the age of 22 my debt was around 150k and that is to people not cards so i cant just do bankruptcy and call it a day.

i have known my gambling needs to stop, i have lost. I have banned myself online and all land based.

still i somehow find a way, go to the arcades loose a wage in the arcade , borrow from family , make my mum skint, that still makes me feel bad.

i am on a journey which i need help with , i have vowed to give my finances to my wife ( does not know i gambled) and arrange payment plans with my family which are affordable for me.

i hope we can all get through this and be the people we were meant to be , loving happy caring. Instead of deceiving lying and sneaking.

i do not want to gamble anymore. I have accepted defeat- i have accepted defeat of around 4-500k in the past 10 years. Could of had my own house by now.

but its never to late . Gamban.gamstop.gamcare - put my faith in you.