New Here... Finally can Talk

Ok..I have my first couneslling assessment on Monday ... I am so ready for this... it's s**t or bust for me.. and I will not do bust... wish I could be like all those "normal" people out there but i'm not but with help I hope to be one day at a time xx good luck everyone out there fighting the same battle xx

You have a good job. Work out your payments and how you will start paying debts and before you know it you will be saving for wonderfull holidays with the family. Come clean to the important people in your life and have a good cry ( I have today it helps). Also maybe think about letting your husband control your bank account and cards.

hopefully you ou will look back in a few years and maybe this will of made you a better and stronger person.

Thank you !!.. Ihope so...I can't lose the most important people in my life... I won't.

I read your post and thought it was me! I too decided to get some help today and stop playing slot machines as it could ruin everything I have.

Hi ya. Ah i feel so so disgusted with myself. I don't know how it got so bad. I truly can't get any lower. Reading stories on here makes you see how it can happen to anyone. So easy. In my work i help people, sort out their problems. I'm full of good advice lol but my life is in pieces!! How does that happen. Good luck on your journey. I'm in this for the long haul I'm determined not to go backwards. Xx

Hi, Well done on taking the first step! I haven't gambled since mon 4th aug. I know that wasn't very long ago, but believe me it really feels like ages ago! I have been able to breathe better, sleep better and feel good about myself for the first time in a long time! I have been busying myself with my wondeful kids and my lovely house, I almost neglected due to my problem!

I first found online bingo after i lost my Dad in 2010. I finally found an escape! I was winning money every week!

I suppose it took over in the end as i would get really greedy! A few hundred quid was no longer a buzz. Then i won a few grand on a slot prize draw! Wow! What a buzz. I spent that on debts i had been neglecting due to my new "hobby" cleared my feet a bit then thought i could win that again, easy! And i did! I have won thousands. The thing is, it just gets me greedy for more and even though i do treat us all with the winnings, a fair big chunk will go back on to gamble and i will lose it again. What is the point hey, I may as well stick all those deposits in a savings account and save for treats.

I couldn't tell my partner about how bad my problem had become again as i already came clean a couple of years ago and promised to knock it on the head. He knows i still play but i think he thought i was still i control. I easily lose control once i start making that first deposit. It got a lot worse recently as my Mum had a stroke and now she is disabled and i am now caring for her...

No more! Like you, i want to be the smart and happy, together kind of mummy. It is right there in front of us and we couldn't see for this horrid addiction... our beautiful kids!

Concentrate on them and keep logging on here everytime you get the urge.

Good Luck!

Lizt u r not alone I came clean about my addiction last week to my wife it wasn't easy but we r getting through it I've only just realised I nearly lost everything ie wife house family for the first time in years I feel alive I'm so glad I came clean about it all I just wished I did it a year ago b4 the 8k debt now I've handed everything over to my wife she's taken control of everything no more bank cards or cash for me for a while maybe never but that's how I want it to be .. Family & love ones r more important than money .. Good luck to u all we can beat this f.. Ing demon together .

Your words mean a lot thank you !!.I am taking myself out tonight as the chidren are with their Dad and my boyfriend is away prime time for wine and gambling.. I have been to the docs and started anti depressants today... not feeling too good about myself and that's usually when I can do my worst gambling because I get an "I don't care attitude" very destructive... so I'mnot going to put myself in that position so I am away out..hope you're doing ok xx

Lift did u have a good night !! I had my 1st counselling session yesterday bit nervous to start with filling a questioner in telling them about my lifestyle but after that it was all good came out feeling positive @ like a huge weight lifted of my shoulders I would recommend it to anyone it can't do no harm .. I have 26 free sessions over a 9 month period 1 a week for 3 months then ever 2 weeks .. This is not going to beat me .. 1 session down 25 to go !! f... The bookies u have seen the last of me ... Good luck to u all together we can beat this

Oh that's brilliant news. I have my over the phone first on monday. Yes I did it was so nice not to be glued to the lap top. Still feel like i have a world of s**t to deal with but one day at a time eh. I'm on the lap top now self excluding myself from as many as I can. It's amazing how many of these sites you join for free money!! Hope you are having a good day. My kids are back in an hour so that will definitely keep me away from the gambling. It's funny as i close each account they offer me gam care details. I wish I'd found this place earlier but like everyone says i guess you have to hit rock bottom before you even entertain the thought of really needing help!!.hope you're ok xx

I'm good thanks glad u had a good night my counsellor told me I came at the right time ( b4 I lose everything )as it is easier I suppose because if u lose everything how much lower can u go ? I suppose it make their job easier for them to try & rehabilitate u .. Even the wife is taking me out tonight for a few beers as she says she is proud of me !! Feeling like a new person with hardly any worries .. Sleeping better & feeling better .. The only way is up for me now & I hope u get there eventually .. All the best lizt

Hi hope you had a good night. That's so good that your wife is supportive. I'm hoping I'll get the courage to tell my boyfriend soon. I feel really low today. Just want to go to sleep and never wake up. I don't think I want to gamble i am just very tearful at the mess I'm in and dreading how to get myself motivated to face it fully and set about fixing it. No energy today just very low. I guess that's normal. Hope you're having a good day. Looking forward to my counsellor phone call tomorrow.

Lizt hope u r ok today for over 8 months I felt like u did worrying about every thing ( not sleeping & when I did not wanting to wake up ) speak to a professional but in my experience it was best to come clean it was the best decision I've made this year I was terrified what wife would say or do .. But it now feels a great weight has been lifted .. Sleeping well not having panic attacks when knock on door or phone rings or post man bringing final demands .. I was lucky I had a understanding wife & mother in law .. I'm glad I came clean b4 it went to far .. Good luck with the counsellor & hope it all goes well for u .. It's not healthy not to have a proper sleeping pattern .. Don't let it get u down lizt we can beat this if we all stick together .. Good luck for today COME CLEAN !!!