playing slots is ruining me

Rock bottom now

Chin up julie there may be a solution somewhere

Yeh the gas oven I can't believe iv let it get this far sat trying to work things out feel totally washed out I used to be so happy I'm just living a lie

Thankyou dean just when I thought I was getting somewhere knew when I woke up today it was going to be one of those days can only make me stronger I hope you know what they say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger , I'm sat here looking at my snoozing husband thinking how could I do this to you x

Thanks for the encouragement I was nearly back to day nought earlier have made a plan a budget to stick to just need to get the mortgage sorted I'm scared stiff of phoning them , what do I say oh well it's like this I gambled 2 months mortgage thought I'd win it back what a complete idiot what can I say I'm unsure what to do now reality is hitting home

Lol you are probably right about the lying part going to phone them and feed myself to the lions it's my own fault you have to pay the price as long as I kick the gambling in the head I'm not bothered it's caused to much pain grief and heartache thankyou for your help x

Hi Julie. Only just got to read your reply Hun. I am so sorry u had a S****y day-that was me Sunday. How much did you do? Pls don't b afraid to call them. I've left things for months and ended up with ccj's yet when I called it was a weight lifted off my shoulders. I know exactly how u feel. The hating your self , the sleepless night, the crying... Wanting to drive my car into the nearest wall. Things can only get better, right? If you want to chat via email then pls pop me over your addy xxx

Julie how does your husband not realise re mortgage, bills etc?

Hi star he has never sorted a bill in the 28 years we have been married everything is left to me been hitting and missing mortgage owe 2 months all other bills are ok still not been on slots though hope I can last out the stress off it all is killing me but I'm going to phone mortgage company tomorrow I'm staying clear of gambling if he finds out he will kill me

Make that phone call today julie. It will make u feel so much better. Let us know xx

Made the phone call was told it was in my own interest to pay extra and would help my case gave them my offer they said to pay it till it goes to court and see what happens

My mortgage company has just changed company's to a new one they didn't seem all that helpful but iv said I will pay something every week and a lump sum at the end of each month got 8 weeks till it goes to court so I should be ok taught me a lesson , hubby gets paid on a Thursday so made a payment today and no slots still had bad urges but can't do it fingers crossed everything will work out

Thankyou it's good to have someone you can talk to someone to be truthful to I'm sure I will get over all this eventually

I've just read the comment to me day@atime earlier and I didn't think it was a place to pass judgement. If u read what I wrote I clearly said I saw and if anything opened my eyes even wider. I don't go in there weekly or monthly. Our casino is a restaurant bar etc I didn't slip up because even now I have faith in myself something that I haven't had in a long time. I wouldn't advise doing it usually but my husband and I are young and have friends who enjoy socialising at bars/clubs etc and I can't expect my husband not to do it just cause I have a problem. Him knowing makes me problem far easier to control at the moment. I'm not stupid enough to think I'll always be OK I know full well I won't as I've been doing this for 6 years. I've learnt an awful lot about myself in that time. I realised that half my problem was the secrecy that surrounded it. I lived a lie. Hid money. Hid letters. Now my problem is out in the open I haven't one urge. That won't always be the case but I'm happy with myself and my progress that I have made.

Well done Julie. U can do this and you will. You seem determined enough and try to make things visual. U can see your own progress and development. Have your starting point...see the debt/spare cash disappear and rise I feel like that's a great confidence boost too. Keep going!

Thankyou today has been one of the first days for a very long time that I haven't wanted to play the slots it hasn't even crossed my mind just wanted everyone who has been supporting me I'm doing great put the gambling money I would have used on the mortgage daily as soon as I get up then it's done no temptation I feel better cause I'm doing something towards clearing it onwards and upwards