Hello everyone, new member here and this is my first post on the site.
I believe that my gambling has gotten way out of control and is leading to a full blown addiction if i don't do something about it.
A little background to my story. Around 3 years ago i split with my long term partner (non gambling related), i spiraled into a bout of depression, alcohol, and subsequently lost my job. Up to this point gambling was practically non existent in my life apart from the odd tenner on football accas or big horse races it certainly wasn't a problem. I left the relationship with around £5k savings and used some of this money to live off whilst i found my feet, eventually rented somewhere cheap and set myself up as self employed. My income is quite low (basically part time) but so are my outgoings so i made a concious effort to reel in my spending and try to save some more money. Working part time afforded me much less stress and much more free time. Over this period (around 2 1/2 years ago) i signed up to all the online bookies and took advantage of their sports betting offers, again this wasn't a problem at the time, i'd use my free time to bet on the football over the weekend, small stakes maybe £20 a time and would win a bit or lose a bit etc.
I'd never had an interest in casino gambling at all but in November 2017 i started exploring these online. My very first attempt i won £450 on slots from a £20 offer followed a few days later with a £700 win, i put around £100 of this back in but at the time was savvy enough to withdraw the rest of the winnings and add to my savings. Through knuckling down the previous years i'd managed to bump my savings up to around £14k and was financially in the healthiest position i'd ever been in. From there and initially through boredom i'd find myself gambling on roulette online (never at the bookies), by the end of 2017 i'd lost around £4k (one particular night i lost £1.5k) and my savings were down to £10k. I now realised that this was becoming a problem and new year decided enough was enough, if only it was. By mid January i'd gambled away a further £3k and was now livid at myself for losing half of the savings that i'd made sacrifices to save. But i couldn't stop, still i felt the urge to have one more try, at this point i was chasing my losses convincing myself that one big win and i'd be back where i was and could leave it alone. The weekend before last i'd had a drink and proceeded to lose pretty much every penny i had left on roulette, ridiculously high stakes, everything gone. This past week i loaned a grand from a good friend of mine, had enough sense to go shopping for food and then blew the rest (around £850) on roulette and slots once again leaving me penniless.
This is obviously already a very big problem and one that i didn't forsee myself getting into. Nobody knows about my addiction or the amount of money i had and now lost. At least until a few days ago it was my own money i'd squandered but now it's something else, i'm now in debt to someone and need help before it gets any worse. I literally have no money to gamble right now but when i do i'm not sure i can resist the urges, what can i do?
Thanks for reading.
Hi Alex,
Yes. It is a problem. Your story of chasing losses is very similar to many of us here. Trust me you will never get out chasing eve if you have won. I won 4 times nearly to breakeven but guess what you never get out when you win. You think now it is my chance to make some more money again and things go south. Once i lost all my savings I felt c**P and it is not what we deserve.
Resisting urges is the most difficult part. I am having quite a few for past few days but since I have come clean to my wife, I share these thoughts with her and she helps me talk out of it. I will suggest coming clean to a real person whom you really trust will certainly help.
Firstly, self exclude yourself. That one big win will come but you will not stop. Therefore, it is better to not risk anymore. Get yourself back on track, save up, and live a healthy life. I know it is hard. We do not have an option.
As my wife put it - we can either be homeless or have an home eventually saving penny a day.
Good luck.
Hi tornsoldier, and thanks for the reply.
What you say is exactly right. I spent last night reading this forum and quickly realised the scope and severity of this illness, it is literally impossible to win if we don't know when to stop.
I'm going to take your advice and that of others and self exclude before i get drawn in again. I'm single (lucky in a way as i've only let myself down in this scenario) and don't really have family that i can confide in. Am thinking of telling my mate i lent money from how stupid i've been, he won't be mad but will probably give me a telling off, will hopefully give me the incentive to start valueing money ahead of gambling and to pay him his money back.
Thanks again mate
Good luck, man! Just feel free to share your feeling here. Being single can go both ways. You have a life ahead of you.
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