Refunds from gambling sites

Hi Cheeky14, i'm sorry this has happened to you my friend,

If he has deposited the money and lost it, then the only way you could likely recover it is by envoking legal proceedings against him, which will likely be more money than it is worth. It will also involve the police and give him a criminal record in all likelihood.

If the money is still there, then you can either confront him, or speak to the website management team itself. To be honest, it is extremely, extremely unlikely that you will get any kind of refund sadly my friend.

If you have no choice, then you could speak to his parents, or his boss at work; he has put you in a bad situation, so you can do the same to him if he cannot refund your money. This is not revenge, or anything like that - he clearly has a problem and this needs to be prevented from happening again, by any means necessary; he has crossed a line, a very serious line and that indicates that he has a serious addiction.

JamesP

Well I have just had an email from the site and they have said that they are going to refund the amounts onto my card within the next 3 to 5 working days...I hope they are true to their word....I know he has a gambling issue...I'm not prepared to involve his work nor the police as he needs to be squeaky clean for his job...hopefully the money will be put back into my account in the next few days

Hi Cheeky14, that is wonderful to hear, i'm so very pleased for you my friend.

He must have had the money in his account - it is good to know that he hadn't spent it as yet for your sake.

If you don't want to involve the police, then you need to clarify that this is simply a case of refunding your money, taken from your card - if this isn't the case, then they will pursue him legally which is likely to involve the police; every site has different legal terms as conditions.

If he is stealing, then it is a very serious issue my friend, and things are likely to get much, much worse before they get better; protect your money and make sure that he puts all his cards on the table; you need absolute honesty from this point, and you need to know that he is trying to help himself - he has crossed a line here my friend; I gambled for twenty years before stopping five years ago, and have also been a member of this Forum for seven years - I can unfortunately see exactly where he is headed; maybe we can help if we know more about the situation?

Very well done for getting the money back - let's hope it goes through as you say.

JamesP

Hi,

I'm not sure if the money was in his account as he was using the site on Friday evening early Saturday morning. On my online banking it states that it's pending to go out of the account. I contacted the gambling website stating that he had used my card without my permission and gave them details of his name etc...they located his account and closed it down and blocked him from ever registering with any of their sites again...(That's the best part). I have advised them that I just simply want a refund of the money that was used...my bank advised to contact the police but I refuse to do that. He owes me thousands of pounds which he pays back monthly...He has gambled for years and years and he promised me he would never use my account to fund his habit....I feel P***** off and let down. I just can't believe that they allowed him to use the card.....A he is male and I'm female with complete different names...I hope that the site does not involve the police in it all..I can only assume that the gambling sites deal with partners of gamblers on a daily basis.

Hi Cheeky14 - maybe the deposit was waiting to be security-cleared, so didn't go through - it is certainly unusual that they were willing to refund it straight away.

He has promised you, but let you down quite badly, on top of the thousands that he already owes you. You have to ask yourself what his next step will be - if he has done it once, then there is every chance that he will again, particulary if you try to move on from this without dealing with him very, very severely.

As a former addict, I can only advise you that it is extremely, extremely likely that he debts will continue to spiral, and that he will use any means necessary to fund his habit without addressing it - has he sought help in the past?

Your clearly love him a great deal, but that doesn't mean you have to be a victim my friend. It doesn't mean that he is a bad person either, but it means that his addiction is getting further down the line, and you can't let it continue.

If you are at the end of your tether, then you need to deal with this straight away my friend; he cannot have access to your money under any circumstances and he cannot borrow - all it does is make him much worse - you are affectively funding the addicition, not him. Don't be afraid to take some tough measures because you are ultimately doing it for his benefit.

In twenty years, I lost £350,000, two homes, two partners and all my material possessions, many times over; but I never stole, I never used my partners card - I came close, but never crossed that line; i'm not saying I am better than your partner, but i'm saying that he has the potential to make things far worse.

I feel that part of you doesn't want to believe he has a problem, and that is fine, no-one does. But this is the reality of the situation my friend - he needs to tackle this head-on immediately, without exception.

JamesP

Well good news is, I now have the money in my account....my bank have been brilliant along with the site I. Question...I've put blocks on the PC and the bank have blocked the card on gambling sites