writing this as i have relapsed again i have been compulsive gambler for 10 years and i had the worst year in 2016 was just pain and misery and i promised my self 2017 was my year and i would beat this but its far the case i went 70 days from december 13th relapsed in 2017 and have not stopped its just as bad as 2016 losing silly amounts on the roulette fobts i have had to go the doctors to get anti depressents its got me that low but yeah today i woke up lost £250 at 11am went an borrowed another £250 and went back an lost that in 10 minutes i came out the bookies went and sat on a wall and just cried my eyes out broke down i feel suicidal although i dont think would have the guts to go through with it i am a grand in debt not the worst compared to others but still annoying no job dont no what to do with me life am just a mess and i cant handle the pain and misery any more roulette machines fobts have ruined my life since i was introduced to them i no there fixed and there legally robbing yeah but still go back for more i dont no why i do it i feel hopeless and like i will never beat this addiction i am deep into it what do i do?
GGGG your clearly having a bad time of it mate, you have had a short recovery before so you know you can do it, is there GA meetings in your area? I would suggest that's your next option mate, will power is not enough you need face to face unity!!
HI GGGG
Everyone on here knows what that hopelessness feels like. Feeling are raw because you've just relapsed but you know things will get better if you stop gambling. You have said yourself that you managed to stop for 70 days. You have the power to do it. You just need to get blocks in place. Exclude yourself from the bookies. Give your cards to someone you trust and when you've got money again get them to give you only what you need. GA meetings are great and posting on here regularly will give your life some structure. I wish you all the best in your recovery.
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