Hi,
I am a single mum with 2 children at college. I was brought up with gambling from a very young age and still gamble now, due to boredom mainly. It does not cause me problems financially as I only play what I can afford to lose. Due to family with addictions I am aware that this could become an addiction for me but for now things are ok.
I suffer with depression and anxiety and I am trying to support my son with his gambling addiction and it's so stressful. I don't know what I can do to help him.
It is having such a devastating effect on him and his family I am really struggling....
About 3 years ago I cut ties with him as he was an alcoholic and he desperately needed help but would to seek it. He ended up homeless, nearly died a few times, got beaten up and got in trouble with the police. It was a hard time for me as a mother to have to turn my back on him in the hope that he would get help. In 2013 he took his first step to becoming alcohol free by going into rehab. He completed this and has been alcohol free for 22 months. However an underlying problem he has with gambling has resurfaced and now that he is living an independant life miles away from family things are getting worse. He is a full time student at college and spends most of his money gambling. Often putting things in to pawn to feed his habit. Recently he admitted he was considering online gambling again (something he had a massive problem with years ago and ran up a large debt). He has not seen his young son for 2 years due to the drinking and his confidence is at an all time low now that the gambling has got worse. He feels his life is falling apart and from where I am standing it looks like it is.
I suffer with anxiety and stress from work and over the years I have found the problems with my sons illness very frustrating. I want to help him as all mothers would, want him to be independant and try to get help. He is going to counselling once every 2 weeks but it's not having much effect on him so far. I can feel myself spiralling into depression with the worry and I don't know what to do.
Are there any other people on here who are trying to support gamblers in the family?
Hi Bluemoon,
Welcome to the Forum and thanks for posting. You have come to the right palce as there is a lot of help on here. I have posted a copy of your post on our Family and Friends section of the Forum, where there are love ones of gamblers who may be able to relate to what you are going through and share what they have found helpful in a similar situation with you. You can have a read on 'Family and friends', and see if you can see posts that you can find helpful, and also to read from what people have replied to your post.
Having found this Forum, you by now know that there is help; That your son could be helped if he wants help. Maybe you can point him to our service, and if he callls the Netline or Helpline we will be able to support him. You mentioned that your son is receiving counselling, is this from Gamcare, as we also give free counselling from many areas in the country.
You seem to have been, and is still going through a lot of stress from your son's behaviour, and this may be very difficult for you. We give free counselling to love ones of gamblers as well, so you can also call our Free Helpline or Netline and speak to an advisor who will try and look at the help we can offer with you.
You also mentioned that you gamble, but only what you can afford to loose, and you are aware that it can be a problem if you are not mindful. Recreational Gambling is okay for many people, however ones a gambling becomes a problem one will need help to stop, and it seems like that is where your son is at the moment. We will support you and your son if you contact us.
Take Care,
Regards
Florence.
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