Last night I came clean to my partner about my gambling addiction. It had gotten out of hand and was eating me up and I had to tell him. I knew he would be angry and not react well but I'm devastated now he has finished with me and told me he is 100% done he can't trust me anymore and wants nothing more to do with me.
We have two young children 3yr and 1yr. I don't know what to do I'm so angry with myself and upset. I've taken steps to deal with my addiction, using gamstop to ban any gambling apps or sites from my sevices and told my banks not to authorise any gambling transactions.
I totally understand how angry he is and why, and I deserve it but I just feel so helpess now and upset for our kids etc. I know it's all my fault but I want him to understand it is a serious addiction and it's not the real me I'm not a bad person.
I'm hoping over time we may be able to reconcile but I don't know, am I stupid to think this? I'm a mess I don't know what to do I just want to fix this.
I’m devastated for you. This was my story too. I lost my wife, my family, my home. It was the worst time of my life. The only thing I can say to you is that this sometimes has to happen for gamblers to realise that gambling is not the answer. You’ve taken all the steps to prevent you gambling. Use the raw emotions you feel now to make sure you never go back. Gambling caused this. It has taken it all from us. Do not let it take anymore.Â
I know it feels like there is no future now, but I’m 7 months gamble free. I’ll be debt free soon. I have a new home, a new life, and now I don’t gamble I’ve never been happier. Sounds weird to say it, but being free from gambling was worth the trauma of losing everything. You still have a chance to rebuild. Hopefully that’s with your partner, but if not there is a future still and if you continue to not gamble it will be so much better than you can imagine.Â
Please don’t think gambling can fix this. Your mind will try and tempt you back. Build up a hatred for gambling, for what it’s done to you. Do not let it take anymore.
I wish you all the best and sincerely hope you can reconcile with your partner. It may take a while. Patience is the key. This will be a big shock for them. You’ve lived a lie for years, as I did, and it’s hard for people who dont understand to imagine how we could do that. Focus on recovery, prove yourself to you first, then hopefully the rest will fall into place.
Reach out to others for support. Use the gamcare service. There is help available. Look after yourself.
Stay strong 💪Â
Thank You so much for your lovely reply 😊
@q86r2ugj5pÂ
Thank You Dave 😊
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
