So there I was doing so well, and 16 days gamble free. I felt confident, happy, optimistic, and in a better place. I waited for payday and then vowed this time I would use the month to pay some debt and have enough money for all the usual bills and rent. My car then broke down! It cost me so much money to fix, I got really down about it. All I wanted was a month to buy my kids some bits, and treat myself to something small. I know my thinking is irrational, and cars will always break down. After all my car is a nessesity, but it just really annoyed me nearly a whole months wages went on fixing it. Of course the little devil on my shoulder said 'have a gamble! You can win it back and more to treat the family' I thought I had self excluded from every site possible, but after an hour of searching I found one I hadn't signed up for. Now I have blown my entire wages again, and am in the worst possible position, as I have nothing!
I knew it would end like this, why did I do it again! I'm now counting down the weeks until payday yet again and worrying how I will pay the bills. I'm determined to stop this disgusting illness. The funny thing is my ultimate dream is to own my own home. I haven't been able to work full time since I had my kids so have always worried with my husbands wages we would never get a mortgage. I started gambling to try and win money for a deposit. Now I am in 8k debt with a credit rating shot to pieces, I'll never get my dream. My kids should be reason enough to stop, I really hate myself
Hello bee2121,
Welcome to the Forum.
It sounds like you are struggling on your own trying to overcome an addiction which is beyond your will power. Of course it is very important to be determined to give up gambling but you do need support. It is important that you understand what is behind your gambling behaviour in order to change it. This is not always obvious and takes time and self-exploration. We provide free counselling sessions and practical advice to help you through this. You can always get in touch with an advisor to discuss your situation.
Remember, be kind to yourself and don’t give up on your dreams. It’s never too late.
Best wishes,
Forum Admin
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
