I'm 19 years old. I started gambling when I was 15, always really been with Sporting bets rather than Casino etc. My first ever bet was with ******, back when they did their free £10 no deposit promotion. I signed up with my dads details and managed to win £200 with my first ever accumulator. It was a brilliant feeling. From the ages of 15-17 I gambling a little, pounds really. My parents found out and were ok with it, which was probably the start of my problems. I was in control and it was fun, it made sport fun for me again, as around that time I started to get bored with football etc.
My problem really kicked in when I was 18. I left for University but did not settle, so I left to return home. For 6 months I did nothing. Whilst friends were out enjoying themselfs all over the country, I was stuck at home, doing absolutely jack s**t. I became depressed, and gambling was my release. During this time, my parents had a huge windfall with PPI, and gained around 40k overnight, to which I was given 5k. By July of last year I was -1500 into my overdraft (-6500 losses over around 5 months). My parents were oblivious to this. That money was to help me start afresh at a new university, a real helping hand. I had nothing, well I actually had less than nothing. I had to tell them, so I wrote a note confessing it all. I ran away for a few days because I couldn't face them. I was a coward and I was ashamed After the shock and anger my parents have been really supportive. My elder brother lent me some money to get me back on my feet for Uni which I will always remember. I settled and I am enjoying uni, but I never stopped gambling. Student loans disappear very quickly. My dad has my log in to my online banking now to monitor me and in the last two weeks I went into an unplanned overdraft and I lost around 1k in 2 weeks. I felt in breaking point. It all started over losing £40. I had to chase my losses and it became so much. I came clean to my parents again, with them again being supportive but I can tell the disappointment. They always tell me about how proud they are of me, but I only ever let them down. You'd think that after all of this I'd stop. But no. Another £100 lost today. Money my dad just lent me to get me through to the end of the month.
I always feel like the world is against me. Why do I always lose, whilst a friend of mine today wins £800 off a £2 bet? I get it in my head that I have a god given right to win, which I obviously don't. Does anyone have any advice on how to kick this ILLNESS. I live round the corner from a w**********l at Uni which really doesn't help me at all. I feel like this is ruining my life, and I don't think I can take much more of it.
Thank you all
Hi j_anth,
There are no easy answers to beating this, I am sorry to say. It sounds like gambling has a grip on you right now & there is a big part of you wants to stop.
Truth is you will only stop when you're ready. But listen, you're 19 & yes you've made mistakes but that is your past. I am 39 & gambling has badly affected my life. I've never had any personal wealth because I gambled everything I've earned. It's limited me in so many ways. But you have 20 years on me! My advice, see gambling for what it is, a drug, a disease it's an addiction that will rob you of so much time if you let it. At 19 fill your life with stuff that makes you happy. Get fit, stay fit, go out & enjoy yourself every night. Just look yourself in the mirror & like what you see. You have a fantastic opportunity to enjoy your life don't waste it gambling in the seedy bookies or casinos that leave you feeling worthless.
I've messed up many times but I don't regret my life or my youth but if I could have beaten gambling I think I might have been more successful & much happier a lot of the time.
Being young isn't always easy I know, but if you don't beat the gambling bug you can find yourself 10 or 20 years down the line having wasted so much.
Find a better buzz.
All the best,
Mike
Hi j_anth, your story sounds very similar to how mine first started. Little football bet here and there when I was young then gradually getting worse. I gambled for years but the last 3 has been where it took over. I stongly suggest talking to a counsellor. At first I thought no way but it's really helped. They help you think straight and understand it all better, as well as helping put actions into place to stop it. You're still so young and have so much going for you. Don't let this illness take over your life. I've been gamble free for 7 weeks now and I feel so good. It's a hard road and you'll need support and sounds like you have it from your family. Good luck
Redham wrote: Hi j_anth, There are no easy answers to beating this, I am sorry to say. It sounds like gambling has a grip on you right now & there is a big part of you wants to stop. Truth is you will only stop when you're ready. But listen, you're 19 & yes you've made mistakes but that is your past. I am 39 & gambling has badly affected my life. I've never had any personal wealth because I gambled everything I've earned. It's limited me in so many ways. But you have 20 years on me! My advice, see gambling for what it is, a drug, a disease it's an addiction that will rob you of so much time if you let it. At 19 fill your life with stuff that makes you happy. Get fit, stay fit, go out & enjoy yourself every night. Just look yourself in the mirror & like what you see. You have a fantastic opportunity to enjoy your life don't waste it gambling in the seedy bookies or casinos that leave you feeling worthless. I've messed up many times but I don't regret my life or my youth but if I could have beaten gambling I think I might have been more successful & much happier a lot of the time. Being young isn't always easy I know, but if you don't beat the gambling bug you can find yourself 10 or 20 years down the line having wasted so much. Find a better buzz. All the best, Mike
Thank you so much Mike and good luck to you also
t
Dommyc27 wrote:
Hi j_anth, your story sounds very similar to how mine first started. Little football bet here and there when I was young then gradually getting worse. I gambled for years but the last 3 has been where it took over. I stongly suggest talking to a counsellor. At first I thought no way but it's really helped. They help you think straight and understand it all better, as well as helping put actions into place to stop it. You're still so young and have so much going for you. Don't let this illness take over your life. I've been gamble free for 7 weeks now and I feel so good. It's a hard road and you'll need support and sounds like you have it from your family. Good luck
Thank you Dommy. Good luck and well done on 7 weeks. I will look into a counsellor
Hi,
Your story sounds very much like mine. I would constantly gamble away bill money and then confess to family who would bail me out and then the cycle began over and over again. Each time with me promising id never gamble again. I'm 23 so not much older than you. The thing that changed it for me was writing a list of all the things I wanted from 2017; have a nice savings pot for a mortgage, go on holiday, have a lovely break away and most importantly share with my family how many days I've been gamble free. I'm currently at 51. I never in a million years thought I'd be here. I now have a spreadsheet where I plan my wages and budget so I can see how much money I could have in savings. My Mum will randomly spot check my account so I never know when that's coming. I told my Mum yesterday that I was 50 days gamble free and her words were 'well done, I'm so proud of you'. I can't tel you what that meant to me. If you need a chat, you know where I am.
L x
LHN-050793 wrote:
Hi,
Your story sounds very much like mine. I would constantly gamble away bill money and then confess to family who would bail me out and then the cycle began over and over again. Each time with me promising id never gamble again. I'm 23 so not much older than you. The thing that changed it for me was writing a list of all the things I wanted from 2017; have a nice savings pot for a mortgage, go on holiday, have a lovely break away and most importantly share with my family how many days I've been gamble free. I'm currently at 51. I never in a million years thought I'd be here. I now have a spreadsheet where I plan my wages and budget so I can see how much money I could have in savings. My Mum will randomly spot check my account so I never know when that's coming. I told my Mum yesterday that I was 50 days gamble free and her words were 'well done, I'm so proud of you'. I can't tel you what that meant to me. If you need a chat, you know where I am.
L x
This made me smile. Thank you. I have got through today without betting, but it has been tough. On step in the right direction I suppose 🙂
Hi mate,
You need to look at putting barriers in place to prevent you from doing it. This alone can decrease the urge to do it in the first place and has certainly helped me. If youre at uni then perhaps someone having control of your money isnt practical but you can self exlude. Call the multi operator self exclusion number and add any shops you could realistically visit. For me that meant 179 of them so now I would have to drive 40 miles to my nearest one. its very hard to go it alone without any barriers mate so get some in place and get this beat. I wish I could have kicked it into touch when I was where you are now.
All the best
G
Hi J_anth
Welcome to the site as I say to most you've done one of the hardest parts in coming on here and posting about your situation. Like others have already said you have to WANT to stop gambling first of all and then put measures in place to help you and these would be like telling your Mam, Dad and Brother everything and every penny of debt or you will find it hard to go forward, you really will, from today it's got to be the truth only or beating this addiction won't work. It sounds very harsh but is the truth and like others have said you are young enough to get on the straight and narrow and you can have a great life without gambling in front of you !!! Keep your chin up because thing do get better even if it's very slowly !
"It's good to talk and take it one day at a time"
All the Best
Darren
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