@female28 okay, so you can’t tell him because he’ll leave you. What is the alternative? How long do you think you’ll be able to keep a lie going?
The amount of times that my wife said to me if only I’d come to her sooner rather than make it worse we could have done something about it, yet in my mind I was worry that she would get mad and leave me and I thought I could fix it. I begged everyone just to help me get through a problem but it just enabled me to keep going. If only I’d reached out for help earlier.
I’m going to say two more things and then I’m done. You reached out for help. The people on here, who all have the experience of being in your position have all said the same thing. Why are we saying the same thing?
Finally, if the advice offered isn’t for you, what would you like someone to say?
Chris.
Hi all, im new to all of this today and am in need of urgent help.
I started gambling around 3 years ago for fun. I had taken out my first credit card and started gambling to pay it back. This didnt work. Im now approx 25k in debt. I still always gamble to “claw back” money ive lost or pay bills. This doesnt work.
For the past year ive been spending my whole salary within a few days of getting it on football bets, again trying to win money to “get ahead” on bills. I have had to borrow money from family to get by. I am now in the same situation where ive gambled all of my wages away and am not paid again until the end of next month. I have a mortgage and bills.
I can no longer rely on family help as they are as stuck as me financially and are not well off.
I have a partner and have had for a long time however cant tell him as he dispises gambling and that will be the end of our relationship for sure. I know you are all probably saying well you should have thought about that but the addiction/stress of debts overtakes.
At this point I need money for the weekly shops for the next few weeks as this is my part of the bills i look after at home and im due to docthe food shop tomorrow.
As ive said i have nobody i can turn to and my partner has a special diet due to health so unfortunately cant rely on foodbanks.
I have made all steps to stop gambling (gamcare etc) and really cant tell my partner.
please can someone offer practical and do-able advice. Thanks
I have some really good advice for you, but I'd like to read your post a few more times I'm going to try to find a way to message you on here. It seems to me that you're very worried about where this is going and that you don't want to hurt your partner. It seems you are looking around the corner and know the ending is going to be good if you continue and you are correct. I have a few points that might help you I'd like first make sure you get this message because I didn't see where I could reply I just saw where I could quote I'm not sure what that means so I will wait and get my words together and hope to hear from you shortly my name is Kelly
Look at it like this. You are containing an oil spill. Eventually, people will find out about it. Your decision from this point is to determine if you allow it to become a full-blown natural disaster or a manageable one. Not doing anything is just going to keep that oil pouring out.
Dear Female28,
We are glad that you are getting support. As others have mentioned, we are listening 24/7 on our one to one helpline and Live chat, if you would like this additional help. There is always a solution to debt and there are ways that you can protect your money from now on in. We have a lot of useful information on our website in the self help, finance and debt section .
Keep sharing and gradually you will find your way forward.
Best Wishes
Fiona
Forum Admin
Please tell your partner and listen to good advice on here. I have now been gamble free for 28 days only because i told my husband in the end. I was lucky he was and still is very supportive. It is hard every day and he has to take over the finances but it is the best thing i have ever done. We have cried a lot but what is important now is that we are talking more. It has been very difficult for him as it will for your partner but believe me you will carry on this vicious circle if you don’t seek help. It will get better . Please get help.
Hi im not sure how to private message on here. Could anyone offer any guidance please and thanks?
Hi im not sure how to private message on here. Could anyone offer any guidance please and thanks?Hi all, im new to all of this today and am in need of urgent help.
I started gambling around 3 years ago for fun. I had taken out my first credit card and started gambling to pay it back. This didnt work. Im now approx 25k in debt. I still always gamble to “claw back” money ive lost or pay bills. This doesnt work.
For the past year ive been spending my whole salary within a few days of getting it on football bets, again trying to win money to “get ahead” on bills. I have had to borrow money from family to get by. I am now in the same situation where ive gambled all of my wages away and am not paid again until the end of next month. I have a mortgage and bills.
I can no longer rely on family help as they are as stuck as me financially and are not well off.
I have a partner and have had for a long time however cant tell him as he dispises gambling and that will be the end of our relationship for sure. I know you are all probably saying well you should have thought about that but the addiction/stress of debts overtakes.
At this point I need money for the weekly shops for the next few weeks as this is my part of the bills i look after at home and im due to docthe food shop tomorrow.
As ive said i have nobody i can turn to and my partner has a special diet due to health so unfortunately cant rely on foodbanks.
I have made all steps to stop gambling (gamcare etc) and really cant tell my partner.
please can someone offer practical and do-able advice. Thanks
I have some really good advice for you, but I'd like to read your post a few more times I'm going to try to find a way to message you on here. It seems to me that you're very worried about where this is going and that you don't want to hurt your partner. It seems you are looking around the corner and know the ending is going to be good if you continue and you are correct. I have a few points that might help you I'd like first make sure you get this message because I didn't see where I could reply I just saw where I could quote I'm not sure what that means so I will wait and get my words together and hope to hear from you shortly my name is Kelly
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