When do things feel better?

Hi Hopeful,

I read your post and had to reply, I last gambled yesterday (30/7/17) but I had gone nearly a year without gambling till the beginning of July.

I am currently very down from what I have lost this time and I'll be honest with you it will hurt you for a bit but you will feel better after a while.
There is no way to magical make the money appear again but what we can do is carry on as normal and eventually everything will even out again or at least feel normal again.

The year ago I last gambled I went to GA and after about 5 meetings stopped going purely because of the distance I had to travel, I managed to get over it myself and not gamble or feel the urge too.
I saved money and limited what I could spend and kept myself busy every day (walking the dog, cleaning the house etc) aswell as working.

If you have a mindset you'll eventually get over it and one day in the future you'll look back and think look at where I am now after what I went through.

This time around I lost around £2500 in a month and it really hurts and I had an awful nights sleep last night but I have put together a plan in my head to save and limit my spending again, truth is I like seeing money in my bank but I actually rarely soend it on myself.

Gambling was compulsive for me, filling gaps when bored, I actually went from ВЈ80 up the other night to ВЈ800 down then won some money back which would make me ВЈ160 down then ended up £1100 down, its crazy, its greed and just shows you its not about the money but the thrill and chase.

I am here if you want to talk anytime because I need to get over this myself.

Just remember, one day at a time.

Hi Hopeful.

Some things feel better immediately when you self exclude and know youve done the right thing. Even better feelings come when you know that the blocks are good and backed up with other measures. The blocks must be good though and backed up with honesty and family support

You will have a mix of feelings especually in the earlier days and its natural that you will get pangs. However your mind heals when you cant act on them and over time you will wonder why you ever did it as you associate gambling with the pain it has caused.

More good feelings come when you learn about the addiction and realise that you can never be complacent because there may always be something within us.

Dont be too harsh on yourself because its an addiction that left me without food in the cupboards so its a form of self destruction that we couldnt control. The addiction has no rational thoughts about your children because it didnt even care about you.

You will learn thats its a form of split mind personality and thats what ex gamblers have to come to terms with.

It does take some work and you will have to keep busy and find some positive new interests. keep talking about any urges because they are not rational. Just like any drug your mind liked its fix even though it was ruining you as a person. Youve seen what gambling has done to you so you can see the urges as destructive.

With proper blocks the days rack up and you wont be struggling to get through the days. I will be truthful that you will feel more calm than content euphorically happy. Some days you will feel serene but we all have days when bills need to be paid and the family need shoes etc. Gambling is never the answer though as its not an income scheme and just a mugs game.

Best wishes from everyone on the forum

Thanks you both for such brilliant and eye opening replies, it means a lot to me. You are so right about the mindset. It's only day 2 of not gambling for me and last night I did sleep better than I have in a long while (although I'm now broke this month!) your also absolutely right about the thrill of the chase. I loved seeing big amounts in my bank account, and the feeling that I could buy what I wanted without worrying or budgeting but when I rationally look at it, I am not a winner as I am in debt!

I work full time and have my two beautiful kids to look after as well, I have decided to take up swimming and go back to painting. I took the kids out yesterday and we had such a fantastic day in the country, I almost felt like my old self again.

I am also here if anyone needs support or to just talk things through. I like to listen and offer advice (wish I could take my own!) thanks again I really do appreciate the support 🙂

Taking up those hobbies is brilliant especially as they are quite a relaxing hobby also.

Lovely to hear your feeling positive positive! Everyday will get easier.

I find that things start to feel better when I start to do positive things to help myself.