This time it's different. I've never felt like this before on my many times to try stop gambling. Last Wednesday morning after checking my phone for results not sleeping for days I had enough. I came on this website started reading a few diarys. One caught my eye which I am so grateful I found. Oldhamktf diary is amazing. Reading his diary gave me a huge kick up the b**t. Just words aren't enough as I'm obviously not strong enough to last. Eventually I'll be back to spending the rent electricity money making the kids shows last an extra month avoiding bills etc. So first thing I did Friday morning was phone the self exclusion phone number. No answer but I left a message. No phone call back so will be on phone first thing Monday morning. I've also emailed my counsellor and asked for another chance as I only gave it 2 sessions the last time and thought it was a waste of time. Thankfully she is more than happy to see me again.
Hi Craig
I'd followed your other diary and had not seen you comments before we spoke in chat
Thank you for your kind words they could not have come at a better time.
My diary an inspiration maybe but it's definitely a warning for what WILL happen to you if you don't stick it out this time. Gambling is not worth what you could lose
With the help of here and GA I'm seeing the old me coming back. Has it been easy? No. Has it be worth it? Yes 100%
Now you have admitted you can't stop. Told people close to you that it has you beat and you need there help and reached out for that external help from counselling and GA you are giving yourself the best chance to beat this
Stay close to your diary read others out there they are some crackers out there, one piece of advice I would give you is update lots and interact with others it helps so much.
KTF
Hi Craig
Good start and its nice to see your working your recovery however you are choosing to do that. Keep it up. Tri
At GA yesterday there was two new members. Myself and a 72 year old man. This man was explaining how he has bet since he can remember and he has seen many changes in bookies. He says his gambling was always manageable until they introduced FOBT. He says he can't control himself and since there is just going to be more and more introduced he knows he has to stop. Sadly at the age he is after working all his years he has nothing to show for it. Even more sad is I get the feeling he won't stick GA. I really hope he can and it was a huge eye opener speaking to someone who instead of enjoying life at that age is going to his first GA meeting. Like someone says last night in chat addiction doesn't discriminate it don't care what age you are.
A lesson for you to *** Craig? Give GA chance to help you and you can start giving the same back. Tri
Day 4
Felt a bit annoyed today a bit agitated maybe the withdrawal symptoms of not having a bet. However no thoughts to gamble. Just one of those days nothing goes right and just missed the 22.06 bus as it was early so now gonna be half an hour late for work. Only positive is it gives me half an hour to finish the diarys in reading. Take care everyone.
Day 5 yesterday went fine. No gambling thoughts. Woke up at 8pm to a message from one of the guys from GA asking how I was getting on. Got a bonus of 300 pound from the tax man. One of the kids birthdays coming up so that diets that one less thing to worry about.
Day 9 today no thoughts of gambling. Just got a phone call from a GA member there he's going to email me a link to protect my phone. Been extremely busy with work and the kids. I've got a lot of time to make up to them. Having a look at the last week I've realised how much I've neglected them for my phone or the tv. That's changing though summer holidays coming up so gonna do at least something everyday. Even if it's half an hour in the park. GA meeting tomorrow looking forward to that. Going to beginners class first so 3 hours I'm there for.
Day 10 today just back from GA. Good meeting a man getting his 3 year pin. His family where all there and he had a good day. 3 people reported gambling and one man in heavy debt with loan sharks up at his door. Some great advice from the guys and hopefully they come back next week with nothing to report.
Well done x you are doing really well x
Well done Craig, you're doing very well.
Going back to your 72 year old man at GA. It's never to early to look at what you want in life when you are at retirement age.
A good part of the reason I started to stop gambling 7 years ago, was because I realised even at my age at the time 38, I was never going to get out of debt and would never ever be able to afford to retire, if I carried on gambling.
Now I'm nearly 46 and whilst we never know what life can throw at us, I'm looking forward to being able to retire when I'm between 55-58.
Keep strong and keep posting.
Day 14 today and been a good last couple of days. No thoughts of gambling and I'm already seeing the difference in my finances.
Thanks for the comments guys sadly the 72 year old man didn't come back as I suspected he would. It's a shame and I genuinely hope he finds some way to beat this although we all know how hard this journey is and having gambler for more than 60 years I imagine it's gonna be extremely difficult.
Great news, getting to 2 weeks gamble free. Nice to see you are seeing the financial benefits as well, that's a good spurr on also.
Shame the 72 year old man didn't return, he's a reminder though, to everyone at that GA session, that gambling can continue to rule and ruin your life, even beyond retirement age.
Look forward to seeing you get to the 1 month mark.
Day 17 today just back from GA another really good meeting. Wasn't many speakers so I randomly got picked to speak which I did. Really good bunch of guys who will go out there way to help you. No reports of gambling so a good week.
That's good news Craig, never did GA myself, but it sounds like it is doing you the world of good and helping you keep focussed.
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