After years and years of going round in circles, dipping in and out of this site and loosing so much time and money I’ve outed myself to my family in order to try and deal with this. Having tried to abstain so many times and always ending up dragged back into throwing thousands away I know I need help in understanding why I do it. I’ve signed up to gamstop and opened up the bank accounts to my partner. I gambled like never before last year and have racked up tons of debt. I cannot and will not gamble again. I joined gamstop in 2018 but found a way of using a bank account in my partners name and transferring money from my account and onto bookies. And they are only to willing to accept the lot. I’m trying to recover some of the losses but don’t hold out much hope. They let me open accounts that couldn’t be verified with the details I gave yet refuse to return the money they accepted. It’s been 58 days since the last bet and I came out with my addiction 5 days ago. Feel flat, embarrassed and sick with the money I’ve blown and the deceit. I will repair the trust and hopefully make these important people in my life proud. Here’s to a better future for all of us including me.Â
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Hi,
Good to hear from you on here. Bottom line is to prevent any avenue you have to gambling - use Gamstop and, with her consent, enter your partners details on there as well so you cant open an account in her name.Â
You said that the bookies "refuse to return the money they accepted", are you saying that you deposited money but they wont return due to it being falsely in her name? If you have cash in the account then they should return it as a withdrawal but if you are saying you bet and lost and want them to return it then that's going to be a no-no. Either way, close that account and let Gamstop prevent you being successful if you try again.
You said "’m trying to recover some of the losses" - forget about the losses should you feel compelled to bet again, that money is lost and any more you push at it you will eventually lose as well.
I didn’t mean recover the losses by gambling. I was allowed to open accounts that couldn’t be verified by me giving my personal details but with my partners bank details. They have to successfully verify accounts before allowing deposits now. They cannot of used the electrol register with the details I gave so as several bookies needed ID sent in before I could deposit but a couple let me deposit thousands without issue. Hopefully they will have some repercussions for that but I don’t hold much hope. Both of us are on the gamstop register. I do not want to give another penny to gambling. But I need to focus now on the reasons why I do/did it. To continue to feed these absolute s******s is crazy. And I have for years and years.Â
I’ve told both my partners parents about my addiction. I thought that was important in my recovery. They were upset initially and I’d assume concerned for their daughter/grand daughter. But both supportive. This is such a secretive addiction and so hard to get it out in the open. Saying the words I have a gambling addiction were nearly impossible to get out but once they came out I could talk for hours about it. I’ve been fully open about everything.  I feel much better and would urge anyone reading this who hasn’t discussed it and came out to loved ones to do so. You can’t control their reactions, I feel incredibly lucky that I’ve been supported thus far. Who knows as it all sinks in how it will pan out but I thought I could eventually control this myself and I was wrong. If I’d came out with this years ago the damage would be a lot less and I would not have wasted so much of my time or theirs. I’m going to go to GA for the first time tomorrow, I’ve decided that and not been forced into it. I had put blocks with Gamstop of my own back to before outing myself as well. I also hadn’t lost absolutely everything available to me but have amassed massive personal debts. I hope and think this shows my desire to battle and beat this addiction that has controlled and destroyed me for far too long and will now fully concentrate on the reasons as to why I do it. Not having access to online gambling will help not being active but merely suppressing it won’t and has. T helped overcome it. Any other advice welcome as I set off in search of the better life for me and those I’ve let down. I’ve so many positive things around me, a beautiful and kind fiancé, two beautiful healthy children and a loving family. Today will be a day filled with fun spent with them before returning to work tomorrow and then the first GA meeting. Things are and always have been much calmer without gambling and although I’ve not gambled for 62 days it feels like it’s more recent having outed myself on to loved ones after day 52. Onwards and upwardsÂ
Still gamble free. Been really busy recently. Just moved to a new house, not had much time to think about gambling. Still just abstaining rather than trying to explore all the reasons that lead to my gambling. Need to focus more on that now things have started to settle down and I’ll have a bit more time to do so.Â
Still gamble free. Went to GA for the first tine this week. Will go back again next week. Trying some counselling tomorrow. Determined to stay stopped this time. Starting running this week. Need to start looking after myself. Feeling more positive.Â
Day 99 will become 100 tomorrow. Went to GA tonight. Just listened to people speak. Start some counselling next week. Things are a bit calmer. I will do all I can to keep it that way.Â
Day 105. Â Things still improving. Lots to still improve. Onward and upwardÂ
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