Back to Square One

156 days to go

I'm very slowly starting to feel more positive - like I'm getting on top of the problem. Money is still tight at the moment but is manageable. In 156 days time, my financial situation will be even better.

At this stage I mustn't get complacent nor impatient, as these two things can lead to gambling again.

paul, i haven't read all of this but i would just like to say how brilliantly you are doing.

not through personal experience, but i know how tough abstaining can be.

you should enjoy the little things and try to take pleasure in how little cash it actually takes to make a truly brilliant memory that can last a lifetime

and never get complacent. to echo your mantra - good things will happen when you are not gambling.

good luck x

Speaking from my own addiction with the bookie roulette I know how hard it is to stop , mines been two months since my last bet yet still each day is a struggle.

Looking back on the days in the bookies I would spend all day in there , losing £500 in no time at all , winning bits back on dog forcasts maybe a bit more on the horses then losing the lot + the rest I withdrew from countless visits to the ATM.

The problem I found when I won on the roulette is I just wanted more and more wins , but after 2-3 spins when the number you want comes out it all goes pear shaped and you end up feeding the lot back in hoping your number comes out again.

After my last big loss enough was enough and now after 2 months the haze is clearing and im seeing things a lot differently , hopefully for you as the days go on you will start to have a different outlook on life , the hardest bit is getting over the previous losses but once you get past this you can kick start your recovery

154 days to go

No gambling problems.

153 days to go

Things are definitely on the up financially. My debt is manageable and it's just a case of time passing and not gambling.

When I enter this comfort zone gambling again becomes very tempting. I've already battled urges today to make use of 'free bets' offers with new online bookies.

I need to stay real focused because it's happened time and time again - I get close to being comfortable then end up gambling again. Small amounts to start with, kidding myself I can control it, then after a couple a losses the chasing starts and I lose the plot completely.

Best wishes to all that read this

150 days to go

Recovery is going very well at the moment.

Good things are starting to happen - I'd like to think that this is a consequence of not gambling.

150 days is going to fly by at this rate.

Id say it is, i have self excluded from all the bookies i used to use in my lunch hour and today is the arcade. I have betfilter on my lap top as well, all good blocks that make me feel confident i can beat this.

147 days to go

No gambling problems.

My moods are up and down as usual, but in general feeling positive. Gambling has left me with nothing but debt and a low self-esteem. Those two things can't be fixed overnight.

I'm not feeling the need to post or read on here as much now, but this resource has been invaluable in getting me to this stage and I will not turn my back on it.

143 days to go

I'm managing my finances so much better now. I don't have much 'me money' each month, but generally speaking I have enough to buy and do the things I want.

It's 75 days since my last bet. Counting the days isn't as important now but it's good to see how far I've come.

No gambling today.

Hi Paul, didn't know you fished. Went night fishing myself last night. Lovely, caught some nice lumps of fish, no big carp though, only a small mirror, about 5lb. 75 days bet free is great, keep it up, keep strong.

140 days to go

Had a few slight urges yesterday and this morning, but the important thing is I haven't acted on them.

139 DAYS TO GO

When I started this diary on 1st December 2011, I wote:

"There are many areas of my life that need addressing, but by tackling this problem then hopefully the by products of stopping will improve other aspects of life."

Well, today I put on my trainers and went running for the first time in a long time. Only 2 miles round the block and I had to stop and walk a few times - but it's a step in the right direction.

Now that my finances are starting to improve (slowly) and I'm not gambling I feel empowered to work on these other areas that I'd like to improve - weight/fitness being one of them.

Hoping to have some money left over at the end of the month to buy myself some running gear.

I think I'm 70 odd days gamble-free and have 139 days to my goal. I'm looking forward to the cross-over when days gamble-free is greater than days to my goal. Won't be long.

137 days to go

No gambling problems.

All in all a productive day. I've made efforts to progress (aiming for a promotion and pay-rise) at work, and I've been for another run, not very far - but better than nowt.

133 days to go

Just a quick check-in, no gambling problems.

80-odd days since my last bet and life is slowly improving.

I hope that your countdown will always be lower than mine.

"Life is slowly improving."

Love this comment that you made. The key word is 'slowly' as patience really is the key to ensuring that our recovery journeys are successful ones.

Keep going!

NT