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Hi Lulu,

thanks for your lovely post, I'm pleased I am one of your inspirations (very kind of you to say), and I am also looking forward to following your journey and recovery, I want you to do so well and to change your life for the better.

I really like your last post, very positive and determined and double figures tonight, that's brilliant!

Yes I love my guinea pigs, I have two girls, Katkin who is 5 in October and Ellie who is 3, I adore them and would be very, very lonely without them as they are indoor pigs and stay inside with me. Ellie has her stitches out tonight, wish I could send you some pictures, they are so healthy and I really do look after them.

My anxiety has gone down, I couldn't breathe over the last week, I couldn't control my actions or emotions and I am so relieved now that I can relax a little bit better and sleep. Depression is controlled by medication but even with that, you don't know how you are going to feel day by day when you wake up.

Anyway we have to stay postive Mrs and keep on fighting this addiction. We can all win by deciding to not gamble each day, we'll all be so much better of financially and mentally if we stay away from it.

Have a lovely day Lulu xx

Ah thanks Wilsey that’s a lovely post too, aww wish you could send photos. What’s the stitches for? Hope she’s ok. It is awful anxiety is so glad your feeling better and sleeping better, nothing worse than not being able to get deep refreshed sleep. I’m on medication too, no you don’t know how your going to feel from one day to the next. Probably one of reasons we gambled. It’s a bad way to deal with it but understandable! Exactly we will be so much happier not gambling so many negatives to gambling just adds to the depression. I’m with you Wilsey we are now gf and will stay that way! You have lovely day too Wilsey spk soon xxx

Brilliant ! K9 now working properly tested it and it won’t load games (demos cos self excluded every where!) so it’s working well. Should I weaken again I simply can’t gamble, this is a relief because I can relax more, I’ll never let my guard down totally but don’t have to worry about weaker times as much. 10 days tonight 🙂 double figures so pleased

Reading ppls diaries on here too, wish everyone the best x

Hi Lulu, Elllie had three lumps removed, one was a huge fatty lump on her side, one might have been breast cancer, it was marble sized and on her nipple and the other was a small lump on her chest. £160 in total but worth it, as a responsible owner you can't just leave them like that, she would get very ill, so her stitches need to come out.

Yes the depression I suffer made me gamble and then the gambling made me more depressed, I always turned to it when life wasn't great, like I was escaping from the pain of reality, didn't want to be left with my thoughts and sorrow, instead I would feed notes to the bookies on a daily basis until it would run out. This is the first time that I have turned my back on gambling when my life is so s**t at the moment so I am very proud of myself, it could be so easy.

Pleased your software is working and congrats on reaching double figures, keep on making the right choices and never give in.

Wilsy x

Hi Wilsey x ah bless her. I’d do anything for animals even through gambling I’ve kept up donating. I’d love to work with animals they are better than most ppl I know lol. Yes cos I have ptsd gambling was a way to forget, completely understand. You’ve done brilliantly Wilsey stopping while so raw very proud of you. I’m not sure why I can still access gambling sites but the games don’t load just grateful for it lol I’m not very savvy with technology if it works though I’m happy. Can’t believe how good I feel stopping and knowing it’s got to be for good, before it was always in back of my mind that I could start again and maybe my luck would change:/. Never does does it. I feel properly free this time, reconciled with fact I can never even play bingo or scratch cards or lottery just nothing at all. I think that’s one of the biggest hurdles us cgs need to get our head round. Hope you’ve had good day 🙂 keep on gf! X

When I wake up it’ll be 10 days and I’m so pleased it’s not been easy but my mood is positive and good. Counselling is helping me with other issues so feel good about that too. Started a new job, I like it compared to last few I’ve had lol , cleaning jobs are quite easy to find and I find it easy going through them all lol. I’m pinning my hopes on my bookkeeping course though and when we move home I’m really hoping to find a job in that field. Lots of positive changes coming up, I’m focusing on them. My sons still in bad way but I’ve had to take a step back for my own sanity. Life’s sure not perfect but the pleasure I’m getting st stopping for good is keeping my mood up. Early days I know but I’ll take the good mood. Was a bit down when went through my debts earlier but just understanding that not gambling that will eventually get better is helping. So many inspirational ppl on here

Congratulations Lulu on 10 days gamble free.

Good to see you have put blocks in place, are having counselling and are fully determined.

All your friends on the diaries including myself are wishing you a successful recovery.

Hi Stephen thank you that means a lot x can’t quite believe 10 days! So very very pleased! Thanks again and likewise x :))

Feels really good saying this....10 days! Now double figures, onwards and upwards! Best wishes everyone x

Well done lulu gf 10 days your doing great stay stong we can do this 🙂

Double figures Lulu! Well done and keep up good work!

One day at a time

X

Thank you both xxx hope your both ok. No real thoughts of gambling today:) 11 days when I wake up! 🙂 xxx

well done lulu .you must feel good x

Hi Cookie yes it does feel good hope your ok too X keep on gf! X