DaveUK - New Diary

Hey, snap!

So did I went I finished work today!

What is it about Friday January 7th?!

But I didn't give in to those temptations.

And neither will you!

Enjoy your weekend.

GT

Still on track. Having spent time reading people diaries and postings I realise I don't have a massive problem but just hate losing.

Ah well - havent played roulette machine for a month!

Hi Dave, that may well be the case. One thing I have learn't from these diaries is that gambling is a progressive illness. Live your life to the full but don't ever be complacent. Keep the good work.

P.s it should be an interesting one at old trafford today!

Russ

I specifically told Steven Gerrard not to attend Paul Scholes' tackling Master Class. Did he listen? Did he balls.

Yes Matt - not the cleanest tackle I have ever seen and it all but ended the tie !!

As for my diary - I have to confess I am just so tempted to play the roulette machine - really really tempted. I don't want to give in as although as mentioned before I have not lost that much really I just hate that sickly feeling when I do lose.

I need to keep away or will just end up repeating the win, lose, sulk running to Gamcare diary cycle.

Hey Dave,

I am 'tempted' also...but we simply can't.

How is this for a confusing situation...I found myself, today, quite hating Gamcare...lol. Because it was the only thing stopping me from playing the roulette machine...and I wanted to. "Just twenty quid" I kept thinking. Then I just couldn't. Physically, emotionally...I just felt disgusted --- at the same time as really wanting to. I even thought that I could put in a tenner and play a quid on red and a quid on black. Just to have some 'spin time'. It's sooooo f****n stupid. It really is. I would have probably hit green zero on my first spin and lose the £2.

I'm just in utter amazement at what these machines can do to perfectly rational human beings.

I came home (after the shopping) and gave the Mrs the £20 that I was contemplating losing...that made me felt better...although I still have this bizarre feeling that I haven't had before. I'm guessing that this feeling is due to the fact that I haven't 'caved' to my cravings and so am in a place that I haven't been in a very very long time. It feels a little lonely! Because, before, whatever had happened...at least gambling was always 'there'.

Anywho, positive thinking time...I'm 23 days clean...

Matt

Thanks Matt - when I say I understand, I really do understand. If you can get through this without playing you will go along way to cracking it.

In a way we have been hooked in the same way that the drug dealer hooks their victims - and it all happends without us realising it.

How can so many intellgent people (and there are many many of these on the forums) be so irrational!

I went in the bookies today and was one of those annoying little s**ts who just watches. The man playing roulette got up to £50 and said I am £25 up so I said come off and enjoy the money. One more spin her said and eventually lost it all and started feeding again! He told me he won £2.5K one day - I wonder how soon it went back. That said he was a really nice chap.

Another man came in a put a couple of quid in and won a tenner - he took in and looked reallly relaxed - how I wish I could be that content. Mind you he may have gone back for more and lost - who knows.

I also watched a woman on FOBT paying the fruit machine feature - f**k me I thought roulette was bad but at a £1 a spin, £20 after £20 went in and she just seemed content to pay money to be able to hit the spin button.

I think I am going to start leaving my debit card at home. Without it I am stuffed as I can't withdraw money or load the machine in the shop. That said, I don't really want to leave it at home as I want the option - what an idiot I am.

Well have done 32 days - missing the excitement but not missing 'that' sickly feeling when that eventual loss occurs.

Like Dave and changed_man I've developed a sudden ' feel good ' feeling about wanting to play the FOBT's again having abstained for 2/3 weeks. It's weird how this happens every time.

Changed_man - You did really well not to spend your £20. You seem to be handling things well but I think you take a few risks. On the other hand if confronting your demons ' head-on ' has worked so well for you so far who am I to argue ? Your debut on here has certainly resulted in some good open debate on here, not least your rather unconventional way of tackling the issue. This forum needs more posters like you to freshen things up. It works well.

Dave - If I'd been the guy playing the machine I would have been one of the annoying little s**ts who turns round and gives the watcher the evil eye. This leaves them in no doubt that they're not welcome ( lol ). To be fair I do watch myself sometimes but it's almost always those I'm familiar with and even then I still usually ask if it's OK ( I know how much it P*sses ME off when people don't ask.)

Dave, Dave, Dave, you really are in a pickle about this gambling lark aren't you ? I'm afraid you can't have your cake and eat it. Personally I don't think you have had or ever will have a problem with FOBT's and your occasional dabbling would do you no harm at all if you could just CHILL OUT about it ( blackjack dons tin hat and crouches in bunker to await inevitable volley of fire from ' changed_man ' ( lol ) )

Please answer me this : As you invariably get stressed about the FOBT's but otherwise lead an admirably controlled life why haven't you excluded yourself from all the local bookies in your city ? You'll need to spend a few quid on a shedful of photo's and possibly take few free deep breaths as you enter each shop but that would be the ultimate fail-safe solution wouldn't it ?

I think we both know the answer is that, like me, you can't QUITE bring yourself to do it as you enjoy the buzz too much. As I've said before I'm fairly relaxed about the amount that I spend on those stupid machines but you do find that part of the equation so, so, difficult to get your head around. Luckily you have only the one form of this horrible vice that interests you so the solution to the problem is straightforward.

A blanket self-exclusion is what you must put in place.

Hi Blackjack - always good to hear from you and your posts on my diary are really appreciate - I genuinely mean that.

Sorry if you are struggling a bit - but I know you have things under control.

Again you have me sussed - I don't have, and given my cautious approach to life in general will never have, a big problem with FOBT's.

Bottom line is I get angry with myself when I lose - however little that net loss is.

In some ways I need to stop being so thrifty and enjoy life more - I suppose an example would be that sometimes I should buy things just because I WANT them not just because I NEED them.

I am not suggesting for one minute I should get back into the roulette machines but given the reletively small losses sometimes I should just think 'it cost me a bit - but I really enjoyed it'.

Your self-exclude observation is also correct - I don't want to do it as I want to keep the option open of going to get that buzz.

I have just popped by debit card in a draw upstairs - no chance of roulette machines if I do not have it on me!

Thanks again blackjack.

Hi Dave

Good of you to get back with such an honest appraisal of how you are.

You're probably right in that you need to relax you're attitude to money ( FFS man, the country's in financial s*it and there's people like you not spending anything !! ( lol ) )

I've always been a bit too free and easy with my money but I do have a friend, a single bloke, who is as tight as a duck's a*se. Lovely bloke - we both follow the same team together - but can I get him to prise open that wallet ? No chance, even with a couple of gallons of WD40 to ease the hinge !!

With a family involved restraint is important for both you and I but we aren't here forever and does anybody really want to be the richest man in the cemetery ?

Loosen up a bit and try putting your house on the Reds for a top four finish......oh, don't worry that we not supposed to be betting.....you'll only get as far as the counter before they'll be bringing in the men in white coats to get you booked into the asylum ( lol )

Kills two birds with one stone too : It costs nothing to stay there and I'm sure they won't have any FOBT's in there either. Win Win.( perhaps not the best choice of words for a problem gambling forum though )

Good luck and best wishes

Blackjack

Cheers Blackjack.

I have no doubts that the men in white coats will be after me for putting anything on the reds to just win at the moment - let alone a top 4 finish !

I am not really in the 'mean' camp as far as money goes but am in the only spend if I really have to one so am going to try and address this. It won't be easy for me though !!

Have left my debit card at home today so even if I am tempted there is no way of getting money.

I still have my credit card on me but as mentioned before no chance of using if to gamble - its totally clear but just will never use it (a good demonstration of control maybe particulalry as nobody other than me would know if I did).

Now coming up to the 5 week mark which is nothing compared to the amount of time I have been able to abstain in the past.

End of rambling !!

Hi Dave

Won't be easy for you to spend money ?? Not a statement you see on here very often !! ( lol )

Tell you what, if you're really struggling give me the nod, I'll round up some people on here, and we'll come round to help you spend it. How about that ?

Sounds a great way of sorting out your problem if you ask me.....

Blackjack - I am armed and dangerous having read your fresh volley of advice to DaveUK...

Lol...

I jest. These past three and a half weeks have made me realise that the verse in the song BITTER SWEET SYMPHONY (the Verve) that goes "I'm a million different people from one day to the next..." is VERY relevant to my current position. I actually agree with your advice...today. But tomorrow I may gun you down for less 🙂

If we could all just 'chillax' then the 'problems' we had would be so small. If you have read my posts before you'll know how I like my quotes/anecdotes etc. Here's one that is relevant to us all here:

A 22-year student called Claire writes home to her parents after being away from home for a year. The letter reads:

Hey Mom and Dad,

Please turn page over.

The distraught parents turned over the page with shaking hands.

Hey Mom and Dad,

Claire

Perspective...once we can switch that...we have the power back!

Take care y'all

Matt

Day 24.

Lol Blackjack - trust me I can spend with the best of them but need to be more laid back about what I do spend !! Did make me laugh though.

Nice post Matt - perspective is interesting . I read a post on here yesterday where someone was devastated by a daily loss of £40 - the conclusion to jump to is that's not much but it is if its your last £40 in the world.

Worked really well not carrying my debit card today - just takes the choice away!!

Do you mean one daily loss of £40? Or a cumulative £40 daily loss? If it's the latter...and you don't feel that's a lot...please come live with me Dave 🙂

£40 a day is over fourteen grand a year...

Thinking about that is making me wonder how much I have 'lost' in the past five years. I think I'll think about it tomorrow... :S

Matt