Day 15

Hi

Just an update about my situation - day 15.

I don't know about anyone else here but the night before payday I sat up until my wages went in and deposited into whatever site I fancied playing at the time. I am 15 days into this "journey" of no gambling and I'm getting paid on friday. I'm looking forward to it for completely different reasons. I'm excited to see how far I can stretch it where as I gambled a good portion of it previously. I'm excited to buy treats, save some, pay extra off a bill etc.

I believe I have taken on a positive mindset regarding the no gambling where I'm constantly telling myself and reassuring myself that this is positive change in my life and alot of my stresses and sleepness nights previously were due to gambling..whether it be I borrowed money to cover a bill because I gambled that money thinking I could win some pay the bill and more etc. Or because I felt guilty because once the kids were in bed I sat for hours playing slots instead of communicating with my husband etc. 

But in saying that I still get urges that come from deep inside and when I do, I genuinely come on here and have a read through the forums, it's a distraction and i find other people's stories so helpful. Whether they are on day 2 or day 1000. Even people who aren't in recovery yet but wish to be I feel that if I can self exclude myself then anyone can as I was so caught up in my gambling addiction and that makes me want to help others just take that extra step!