Dormant

Good job your not in the good ole US of A , where "f*g b**t" might cause you a whole lot more trouble ?

Al,

f*g b**t in Kent Vs f*g b**t in the US. I wouldn't know, but I bet the prices are comparable.

A good night Ahoy....A random thought, I last saw these chaps about 3 years back. When I knew them on a daily basis it was nigh on 15 yrs back, then I use to be bang on the gambling.... A new improved version of Paul, part of the inner circle. Will need to keep hold of my remaining limbs!...... woo hoo

Ha..V..i guess "f*g b**t" meant a little more distressing than just chucking the f*g end outta window..some ppl need manners here with posting...sh*it...Sandra...ZIP now ☺ heh heh

Ok...i hope the unsettled train has passed now and you're back to the living! Don't drown yourself in self pity man..you have got much more to offer to this world!..to name a few :
Compassion
Understanding
Strength
Responsibility
Dreams
Courage
Smile = laugh
Dignity
Respect
Kindness
Etc........

Be good to Paul - you're worth it!

Bounce bounce - tigger

Ps..fine coming through ur letter box ...disposing of f*g ends in public cost few quid these days 😉

Thank you for the post.

Very up and down posts from you lately.

Pleased to read you got through last weekend fine, as expected.

You keep coming through the tough times and improving along the way. Keep pushing through and life will keep improving with you.

Googles all round tonight my friend , I had to check on the Stockholm syndrome as I'd never heard of it , ones things for sure if I never completely give up gambling being in here , then my general knowledge will certainly have improved , I'll never " have a go Paul , just some good banter ! Take care and enjoy the rest of your weekend , Al

Random thought... This forum is sometimes like the house of commons.. As like the present Brexit debate and the eruption of infighting, in which way to go!!

Yesterday, I left my place with the intention of buying an ironing board, paper and a coffee. Instead, I got raving drunk, went over the threshold of a bookies and had very minor damages... What's my trigger???

My life in Kent in nigh on 3 weeks.
1. f*g b**t misdemeanour.
2. Feral kids throwing a pizza slice at me.
3. Getting dizzy by train men, as they sent me in circles for a £50 ticket refund...

Have I answered my own question . .

Townie Revenant

Bit harsh Paul , as with everyone else in the street Hilda's got an opinion and a right to reply , bad day fella ?

Lol...

Cyndi Lauper song comes to mind..... True colours...

Shining through loud and clear, and very proud of them I am too. I mean every word I say, always.

Paul to be honest I don't think it's " Pure nastiness" that comes into it , I have witnessed a lot of anger on here and I'd be inclined to say thats increased of late but in my opinion due to only one person , if someone posts in such a provocative manner and in such a way that no body is directly aimed at then rifts will be caused and sides will be taken ! .

I don't particularly like it when someone post's a comment that they know will stir things up and then doesn't have the decency to respond when questioned over the post , anyone on here can post and do that but I'm really dissapointed when it comes from someone who should really know better . I know you enjoy the stirring of the juices and to a point so do I as it gets people thinking outside the box but when I'ts done in such a way that has a detremental affect to the harmony of this forum , you have to question that posters motive and then to say that it depresses them to be here , w*f is that all about , if there that unhappy having to put up with all us poor souls , who are obviously beneath them , then why keep hanging around to insight more anger as us addicts have enough of that in us to last a life time !

people come here because they want help , sanctuary , to lick there wounds or for compassion and understanding and thats great , it works for some of us but not for everyone and there are alternatives but if you come here and a long standing abstainer who doesn't want to offer some form of encouragement by talking with individuals and not at them especially amongst the newbies , then they should just fe.ck off and leave it to people who have a bit of compassion and empathy and not someone who judges them over not conforming to a particular set of standards .

Sorry for the rant but it really pi.ssed me off yesterday , so again he's no doubt got the reaction he was looking for !!

Just my opinion Paul and as always do with it what you will .

Night buddy and I hope the heads not too sore in the morning

The funny thing is Al, I agree with the majority of what you've said there.

But on one thing, we're going to have to agree to disagree on is - What I read yesterday, was some ones opinion on there diary! And, as you rightly said to me, everyone's entitled to an opinion, so, sorry to say you've some what contradicted your self.

I can be a right P.rik, I admit that, it's a flaw of mine and sometimes when I should let things go, I tend to wade in instead, yet im a fairly quiet chap. But, one thing that does rile me, is when poison is shared round and the attempt of devide and conquer arises.

If you've noticed of late, iv'e pulled away of supporting others of late! And the reason for this, is I would be a hypocrit as in this moment in time I don't trust my own recovery. Also, I can't be angry in a post on my diary and then all sweetness in another post. No consistency and it's false...

I'm sure you would agree, it's nice to know where you are with people. So for work as an example, I always prefer strong boss's who will pull me when I f**k up, rather than the ones who will just have a good gossip behind my back. ...

Rambling rather than gambling and thanks for giving me something to think about.

My self induced head from yesterday's blow out is easing, so thanks for that.

Last one Paul then I'm off to bed , Yes I understand the " own opinion on there diary " but you and I know it doesn't work that way on an open forum , everyone checks the diarys of those where they either like the other diarist or feel there may be a bit of juicy controversy to be had , were all guilty of that but as its an open forum and unless the person specificly asks you not to post on there page if it upsets you or hits a particular chord then your going to respond and that poster is fully aware of that fact when making a bold statement , it's like a cyber line in the sand .

Fair point about pulling away though , as you know what feels right to you and when and how to respond , I laso agree with you on the fact of knowing where you stand with people , " say it to me " is always the best way forward , I know weve not really spoken a lot lately ourselves but that doesn't mean anything to me other than our paths haven't crossed as much , so all good in the hood as LB said !

Right I'm done , time for a Drambuie and bed me thinks !

Night Paul and all the best !

Hi V,

Hungover & attacked by slice of pizza? :-0 s***t man , where are ya hanging out? 😉

Good to see you around if thruth to be told...didn't speak to many ppl lately but slowly coming round now. ..happened to witness a proper Brown storm on here lately & guess what - my horse been firmly on a short lead! 😉 ..progress me thinks!

Have a good week dear V and look after yourself

The familiar feeling of disappointment is my companion this morning. I've no wounds to lick with regards to my relatively small wager but dissapointment in my Saturday blow out and paying for it today!

I started a new contract last Monday, the facade has polished up ok, but the insides and flutter flies are churning away. Too old for that and didn't see it coming after relatively healthy week.

I know what I need to do, well rehearsed in it! After a few months of clarity, I felt the head fog appear a couple of weeks back and wonder to myself, is this the process or am I on a self destruct mission again.

If I was to reminisce, I can both feel proud and fortunate in the places I've seen and the people I've met, yet feel completely unfulfilled, am I someone who will never be happy with his lot?

There's a GA in my new town tonight. Right now, I say to myself that I will venture down and see what mix of people I will meet, then, again, I don't trust that predominant thought. It keeps lieing to me!! Will see hai !

A long day ahead of me today, im quite well versed in it, but f**k it does get harder...

Is this a woe me post? Probably, but in this moment in time, it's how I feel as I use writing to snap me out of this head funk...self induced....

Final thought for today... Resistance is insidious..

Paul.

Fella I have a friend who repeats the cycle every few months.

Why?

He offers 'it reminds me why I cannot go headlong at the life of an active compulsive gambler'

I get it the desire to keep looking into the eye, for me I know that I wouldn't stop,I would pursue it past the point of no return.

I have stood on the threshold of that place, my will to live stopped me as I tried to walk in, that day I saw rock bottom, never reached it but sure could smell it, but that's common I believe.

Compulsive gambler / escape artist. ?

I got your request and warned the hounds lol, maybe taking a stroll across that h#ill again, I sincerely hope so.

Look after yourself.

If you decide to venture into the room.

My dear friend bob says 'just pin your ears back and listen, from it take what is relevant and ditch the rest'

I agree because I think the point is that I can't get comfortable in another man's shoes, I have to wear my own in.

Abstain and maintain

Duncs stepping forward never back