Gambling- the sure way of getting nothing from something! 11th May 2014

Apologies captain,I haven't been in the best of modes all wkd,didn't see your post.

I value your support and posts,thanks.

Your right my prob like yours is deep rooted,I'm not keen on that analysis,it makes it sounds like its impossible to overcome.

I've tried eradicating certain bets like yourself and to be fair I haven't had a bet in a bookies for at least 7 years,

That's knocked out virtual and greyhound bets. Tried various systems on horses,love betting in running on most sports,especially cricket becausae I know more about it,well think I do!

My problem is the first bet. On friday I just couldn't resist backing austtralia to beat west indies oin the cricket,had a large bet on them to score more 6,s and in running to win the game- come the final over the only way I could lose was if two 6's were hit,- obviously they were.

I wanted my losses back immediately,I can't wait for tomorrow,next week,so I move on to the horses.

Have the heart break of a last fence faller,but by sticking 500 on evens horse I get back level.

Time to quit? No chance,I'm in the mode now,my luck has changed,so I thought.

100- loser,100- loser,and so on until I'm whacking 500 on rugby league that I know f*** all about,just because its the next live sport on tv.

Didn't sleep much fri nite,wake up sat morn early,fuzzy head,feel like my worlds collapsed,I know I'm doin wrong and buy a paper,work out a sure fire footy bet to re coup my losses,before I even put that on I'm betting on the morning cricket game,alraedy 300 down again,- I've given up by now,I had 1 last throw of the dice on a footy line before self excluding.

I'm never gonna be like you captain,I go into self destructive mode after 1 loss,total abstence is the way I have to go.

Thanks for your post Lazaraus,I'm hoping all this pain I've caused myself will be etched deep in my brain,I'm hurting at the moment,and really have had a gut full. Day at a time from now on,I'm not looking to far ahead,I'm gona do things I don't normally do this week,anything apart from gambling.

Thanks for all your support,I do value this site.

My recovery route may indeed sound impossible Robby but it's not, although it has meant playing the long game over many years but it was the only way for me.

Totally appreciate you want to go for total abstinence and I really hope you can do it. I was like you for 25 years, the first bet was crucial, if it won I was happy for the day, if it didn't I had to chase until in profit or lose a packet trying. But that only applied to me when the first bet was random, often chosen quickly with very little analysis. Took me years to realise that sports bets placed in advance based on knowledge, could often result in disappointment and being totally gutted, but didn't result in loss chasing on that day, although that could sometimes occur on subsequent days when the memory of the bad luck was coupled with extreme boredom or stress.

Having eradicated random gambling from my life, a near miss from a football bet now just results in me focusing on the next one, which is midweek or sometimes the following Saturday. Has taken a lot of brain training to get to that stage.

I realise total abstinence is the only way for the vast majority though and I really hope you can find a way to do it.

robby

fella seems like you have reached a folk in the road, one way leads to further gambling, your addictive side ruling the roost, you chasing those pipe dreams, the other path on offer abstinence.

Only you can decide which one to take my friend.

All I will say is if abstinence is the path you choose then give it a real try, stop formulating those 'get money for free punts and really give abstinence a try.

for me I understand how bent we become through our addictive nature, f**k fella I gambled my life to the point where I was actually was a day from losing my house, the shitte##st thing about that is my wife was oblivious to the truth, because the lies I spun even had me fooled into thinking that gambling was the answer.

Is that what drives you on, the fact that you have too gotten away with gambling excisting in your life.

Abstinence gifts me peace of mind, yes there are days when addiction temps me, the false promise of quick free money on offer

but in truth abstinence offers an end game, a constant result, ok you can say the buzz ain't there.

As my wife says 'buy a blo#ody bee hive!!'

choice is yours Robby, I hope through the one you make the recent desperate posts abate.

Duncs stepping forward never back

Thanks for the post dunc,you reminded me of a phone call I made back in may 2000,bank holiday monday,first time I phoned ga.

The chap on the phone said the same thing,your at a crossroads,if you don't stop you 3 things will happen to you,you will either end up in prison,homeless or dead. - so true.

I've been avoiding thinking about gambling,I'm still sick of it,won't gamble today for sure,day 4.

Gd morning diary,the week is moving quickly,thrown myself into work that has helped get over last fri/sat.

Penny pinching when I can,which also helps,makes me feel I'm moving forward,clearing up the damage.

Why. Oh why I didn't I get rid of my debit card months ago? Its been the missing bit of the jigsaw.

Those impulse urges could not have been acted on. Im lucky i live in a small town,I know the staff at my local bookies personally and I have been excluded for years,I would have to travel nearly an hour to the closest bookies,I haven't the time or transport.

I know cutting up my debit card doesn't solve my problems or pay the overdraft,but it gives me time to recover and put gambling behind me.

Day 5 will be gamble free.

Day 6,all is good,barriers up working a treat,had the expected odd urge,but im still really sick of gambling this time.

Overdraft and other bills started to nag at me earlier,but i recognise this is part of the addictions way of getting to me,i have to be patient,and above all else NOT GAMBLE.

Im so lucky to have what i have in life,i think ive took it for granted for too long,luckily ive realised this before i have lost it all.

Avoiding that race tomorrow is virtually impossible,radio,tv.papers even the poxy postman mentioned it earlier,im goin to the park with my girls,no tv`s there!

Well done on the 6 days Robby, hope you keep it going, the weekend will be a test.

Well done Robby. Tomorrow will be the first time in my gambling life that I won't be throwing money away on the grand national. I shall be with my wife shopping. Keep strong Robby, this is an illness that people cannot see and it is so hard to beat! The longer we have been cg the harder to quit! I to have gambled for 20 plus years, I am on day 3 and feel good!;-) All the very best.

Hi Robbie

Well done on a week and I hope you have a great gf weekend x

Linda

Thanks for the posts hard times,captain and jyam

Had a great wkd,the great thing about having young children is it does`nt cost anything to entertain them!

Did watch the national,defo wouldnt have won,didnt really cause me any problems,same with the cricket final yesterday,did have a little thought sat dinnertime of having a 1er on the national,the thought soon left me,and have no way of putting on a bet anyway,the hassle i would have to go through to put a bet travel out of town etc,dont have the time or much money at hand no more,extreme measures really helping.

Ive always known i can live with this illness,but not having any way to get a punt on is really working for me at present.

I know there will come a day when i will have an urge to travel out of town to have a punt,but not for a while,im still hurting from 9 days ago,just for today i shall not gamble

Day 11,all good,taking things a day at a time,got a long wkd off ahead,got things planned,tho it will involve going out of town a some stage,gona make sure I carry as little cash as poss.

I've gota say I've been feeling good,physically and mentaly,no drama's any urge or thought is squashed and no ability to act upon them is a god send.

It was all too easy before,a moment of weakness,just the 1 quick gamble,search for a bookie I'm not excluded from,a minute to fill out a form and away you go. - Its not ideal not having a debit card,but I always got by when I couldn't get 1,a small price to pay for a gamble free life.

Hi mate,

Apologies for not being in contact for a while.

Really sorry to read about your troubles over the pas couple of months.

Don't want to preach as I'm the most susceptible person to wanting a punt but this will only get better if you don't gamble.

Two things from my point of view.

Not gambling is actually very easy. All you have to do is not do something. As soon as an urge comes and I am still getting them often you just don't do anything. You get up and make a drink or something to take your mind immediately off it. I was so concerned id never be able to watch sport again and enjoy it. But now although I could win I know that in the long run it's a loss.

I used to bet big on nfl on stupid odds and I think u do the same in cricket. I used to put £500 on the first game on a Sunday night on over the points margin at 17/20 without any real knowledge of whether it was likely to be reached. If I won I'd put the £925 on the same bet for the second game. If I lost I'd put £600 on the same bet to break even. I won quite a few times and would be sitting there with £1700. But I only ever withdrew this once (and it was back out of my account as soon as it was in). I also lost more often then not and ended in such a bad position more mentally than anything but I was also broke.

I couldn't get a buzz from anything else in my life. Since I've stopped I still love sport like nothing else but I've started to once again enjoy it for what it is. I watched united last night and went mad (for the 20 seconds we were in front) when we scored and it was by genuine excitement at the game and not the excitement at winning a bet.

Tough love now mate - ignore any urge and just don't gamble. Don't even think of the pain of what's been you can only change what's coming. Chasing this will only mean day 1 again and a worse position then now. Doing nothing is the only way to go forward and make the most of your life.

You were a real help to me at the start and have always been supportive. You can beat this mate

Keep in touch

Stu

Thanks for the post Stu,an ispiration to all,big congrats in 150 days.

I'm back in a good place again,been working very hard to repair the financial destruction I caused,and more determined than ever to succeed in every aspect in life.

Iim taken a little bit out what I've learned the past couple of months,these blips are gona serve me well for the rest of my days.

This is a life time battle,its not just whilst I'm in debt,when I get to that point again when all is good financiially,I'm not gona let down my barriers of no debit card and exclusions,I'm gona reinforce them.

I've been a year gamble free and thought just the wkd footy bet,its only a tenner,this is the bet to avoid-the first one.

Wkd off,I'm wary of the drink and gambling,I'm gona be with friends who gamble,a tricky wkd that I knew was coming,guard up as rainman says. 2 weeks gamble free 2mo.

Thanks for the post Rainman,yep guard is defo up,I'm 41,my friends known I've had a gambling problem since I was 27,its myself I worry about after a few drinks and inevitably the footy being on in the pub,not a situation I find myself in these days having 2 littlens.

Gona do my best to avoid the arvo session 2moro,its a 40th birthday party.

Thinking ahead is a good thing,we all know where things could end up.

Well done Robby sticking with this, learning all the time and gradually understanding the measures needed to protect yourself. It's a long term thing but it's definitely worth it. I liked the fact that you're planning ahead and not relaxing the barriers but reinforcing them instead. That shows you mean business. Good luck on Saturday, alcohol makes us feel less inhibited, be aware of this. You're still at a vulnerable stage but hopefully you'll be ok. Have a great time for all the right reasons.

Steve