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Hey Sandra,

you are not talking to yourself, we are all listening!!! That is a great list you have compiled there, and something that you can be immensely proud with. So glad that you are smiling again, people are so much more attractive when they smile, and I can see your cyber smile from a long way away....keep it up!!

Have a great week

Phil

x

Hi Sandra

I love the list!!!! Phew, look how far have you come along. You deserve to be so proud of all you've achieved.

This list is testament to how your hard work is paying off. Keep up that fantastic effort!

Take care

Irene

x

Aww what a lovely comments, thank you Rach, castle, Phil and Irene.....i'm blessed to have so much support.....xx

Well, last night was a bit of a reality check which i think i should do more often.. ..Bless person who invented green tea - passed out like a baby lol

Anyway, Monday, they get stressful, because thats when i see my counsellor....digged hell of a lot deeper, yea i do get a bit down afterwards, but it's normal as she says, just the way it goes with my expierences.....anyway, went to the beach again, my mate come all the way to meet me bless her, had a good and relaxing time, went to see seals which i feel ashamed of myself i never put any effort to do that before. Only live 25 miles away and passed the place hundred times before.

Went for a jog afterwards, which i missed so much, been 2 days since my last run. Nevermind 3plasters on each heel lol, i had to do it:-)

So yea, good day, glad i didn't slip last night..i want to go long long way...even forever:-)

Cooking now, so watch out guys....maybe fire on a way lol 🙂 ( not the best cook lol)

Take and thank you for everything, hug you all xx

Sandra x

Hear hear to green tea Sandra...the one with jasmine is lovely too..

There is a big life to be lived there and so much better than your mole days ...don't worry too much about past invitations with your friend,,,the thing is you are out and about now and that's all that matters..

Your friend sounds lovely and obviously likes your company...

thank for posting Sandra ...having trouble sleeping as its so hot..

R and D xx

Thanx Rach,

Good morning diary,

Woke up with a jolt, because it's raining outside, and i remember leaving car window open....plus the thunder is not the calmest thing on earth...

Well anyway, early morning for me, long weekend over, back to work tonight, which i have a feeling going to be long day.

Day 65, they adding up quickly.

I will get there

Take care all

Sandra x

Hi sandra

well done on your achievements, how is your leg have you managed to get out for a run? My foot still hurting but going to risk my competition over the weekend.

Stay positive and congratulations on day 65

Take Care Lisa 🙂

Hi Sandra,

Thanks for the support.

Day 65 is fantastic. So pleased for you :).

Hope your car survived the open window with the down pour.

Have a good week

Nicki x

Thank you girls, i wish you to stay strong

Day 66. Can't express how i feel. Not in the best place emotionally, but keep holding on.

S x

Hey Sandra

great post on your diary a few days ago. I know you are in a tough place at the moment- you can do it. Its part of the journey isn't it, tough times and good times- its a bit of a rollercoaster. Hang on in there friend.

Stuxx

Thank you ever so much Stu for support,

Edited my last post numerous times this morning...couldn't find the words to record how i feel. Tears and anger.... I did think about gambling, hell of a lot, but not in a way as wanting to do it, but because i hate it so much. And what have i done for myself by choosing this habit. A lot of anger and dissapointment for myself...

Emotional rollercoaster, didn't help bad news from parents side. Mum not very well, and i'm just stuck.....when they need me the most...I will never forgive myself...

Mummy just hang on, you will get better...and i will b back as soon as i can....Infinite love..

Sorry for post like that, just needed to put it down..

Take care and stay strong

Sandra x

Hello diary,

I need to keep writing, helps me to take my mind of things a lot...

Just read through my diary again....getting long read:) .... I'm surprised how my other side shows off near enough every second post...Up and down...no wonder i can't keep long relationships...fall asleep angel and wake up evil haha...

Today been a little bit boring, a little kip after work( which was worst experience so far, running 13 hours, no t/break, stress....sometimes i wonder why i do all this, they don't pay me more...) anyway, went for a run, relaxed a bit, rang mummy, she sounds better, which made me feel better. Stay well darling:*

Oh yea, imagine this: Senior manager asking for a lift home this morning....yea fair enough...next thing: "-Sandra, can i have your phone number in case i need lift from home some time"????????? .....No comments, disgusting old P**v.....Maybe he is genuine, but i don't trust men i'm afraid, one of my past experiences....so, no, don't think i will even be able to go back to work after this, just hate situations like this.....

So yea, carrying away a bit here, but my diary, i'm sure you can listen:) Still gamble free, pay day Friday...maybe even look for ticket back home....can't stop worrying about mum, it's weird when you get closer to person being thousands miles away....i will be back.

Keep remembering my list, which i like and hopefully hold on to it....New Sandra, new future....fingers crossed....all i have to do is KEEP BELIEVING IN MYSELF!

Thanx diary, nice to get it out of my chest

Sandra x

Hi Sandra

Sorry to hear that your mum's not well. It's totally normal for you to be worried and even a bit homesick-glad to hear that she's sounding better today (no wonder you're relieved).

If the creepy boss gives you any hassle, use the work place policies to keep him in check......or threaten him with your pals here!!!! Why should you feel uncomfortable because of another's behaviours?

Please don't let today set you back-it's almost over and you've coped brilliantly!

I hope tomorrow's a better day for you- take care and keep strong!

Irene

x

Hi Sandra

Thanks for the ongoing support and posts.

Sorry to hear about you mom being unwell, hopefully you can get back there soon. However I'm glad she sounded a bit better, hope things improve.

You really are doing fantastically and

Sorry yesterday has been a rubbish day,but fingers crossed today is better (and the pervy boss gives you

No grief, as he has no right to and he could get into trouble for it).

Take care

Nicki x

Thank you ladies, both take care and have lovely day x

Dear diary,

Not the best night's sleep, nightmares keeps haunting me....but at least no work tonight. So just relax today ( except a good run) and set my mind for a weekend at work.

No gambling thoughts, other more important things on my mind.

Day 67, keep them coming.

Take care all and have a good day

Day at a time

Sandra x

Hey Sandra,

sorry to hear about the nightmares, I am sure they will turn into sweet dreams at some stage. Enjoy your night off and hope to speak soon.

Phil