Here goes nothin :-)

Hi all

Just a little check in. Have been feeling ok. Have had little pangs of wanting and needing but nothing unmanageable. And I havent had any dreams which is an absolute god send (touch wood).

They're the pits. Two weeks today since I played. 14 days of my life back. went to bingo tonight and won £50. for the first time in months that fifty pound is mine, not having to go towards a bill or debt i'm in due to gambling. Got ace night planned for tomo. Mum sister me and friend having tea together, baileys and children in need. 🙂

And its friday tomo woo hoo!

Take care all

Claire x

hiya claire nice too see peeps win for a change spend it wisley and dont donate it all hahah

Hi all

just a quick check in. not alot to report really although it is the weekend woo hoo!!

I do like the weekends, have got the class from hell this year and i'm knackered already 🙁

Not to worry, when I win the lottery tonight I wont have to go back ha ha.

Have a night in planned tonight with mum and another friend coming to join us. Like to watch all the cr** telly e.g. strictly come dancing, x factor etc. you cant beat it. i'll be in my pj's and chillin - bliss!

take care all

Claire x

Hi Claire. Just wanted to thank you for your post on my diary. I'm sorry about your Aunt. I have an aunt that's battling cancer right now as well. It's been a very long fight, and although she is still fighting, I think when the time comes for her to rest, it will be a bit of a relief for all of us to see her out of pain.

I hope you are able to find a church home where you feel comfy again. I was very unhappy with mine for a long time and stopped going, but we recently got a new minister and a new music director, and now I love it! I actually look forward to it every Sunday, which is something I don't know that I've ever done in my life. My faith's always been there, but looking forward to church is something new. 🙂

Anyway, sweetie, thanks as always for your support!

Love, Anna

Hi Claire

If I understand you correctly you're a teacher. I used to be but quit in the summer as the self doubt etc was overwhelming. The Head didn't want me to go but I knew I had to. I now realise I was too taken over with roulette machine on way home etc. I may go back to it in the future but who knows. As for self excluding, I have done so and the managers were very professional and said it's the best thing I could do.

You are not sure if you could post it as you don't feel comfortable. My advice would be to post it through the door in the morning and you know they have it. Then you would be mortified to show your face in there again. However if you go and see them they'll understand, I'm sure.

Take care

Steve E

hi claire sweetie where are you hope you have not gone back to evil machines thinking of you my girl let us know how you are or will i be waiting another 4 mths befor i hear from you again take care and hope to hear from you soon

Hi all

Hi Steve 🙂 Sorry not been on much, been really busy with work. We had our first fundraising event this evening and raised a good amount of money. Really chuffed - got the PTA back on its feet and the event is packed out. Woo hoo!

Sorry I haven't posted much - have been on everyday reading but been tired and so i couldn't bothered typing, lazy mare 🙂

Gambling wise have been doing ok. Have urges still quite alot but managing not to give in. still feel focussed. That is not a life i want to lead. I want to be comfortable, I work bloody hard - I deserve to be comfortable!

Take care all, especially you Steve my friend 🙂

Claire xx

hi claire busy is good it will keep you away from the bad boys ie fruit machines not got much to say myself today just have a quick read befor i head off for a night shift of 12 hours take care my friend and hope to hear from you soon stevexx

Hi all

keeping it brief because i'm so tired. not been on for a while because internet was down. finally sorted it at teatime today thank goodness.

feeling a bit fed up to be honest. kind of gambling related in that I was left with £33 of my wages this month, everything was paid and thats what I had left. I have a really difficult class this year so to have no wages to show at the end has really P***** me off 🙁

I do have lots to be thankful for I know and this will pass but today I am proper fed up!

Take care all

Claire x

hi sweetie hang in there i know what you are saying ref £33 left belive me i work 90 hours a week when i can and see nothing left after i have paid the bills but HEY and its a big hey its not getting any bigger is it stay strong my girl and keep trying your friend and the one who YOU helped so much steve

morning Claire x

Rodders 'e*e.....

just a big thought girl........£33 is better than nothing...not much! but better, we have to thank our lucky stars here girl...you dould be stuck in the middle of the savanna with no food no water and with the knowledge that you arent gonna eat for at least another two days...know what I mean??? work on what really matters and be thankful for the small mercies we are all afforded girl xxxxx

There are plenty of people who really really! have the right to moan....

I know for a fact that when you're really ready girl...you'll lick this!

you have a bright future, honest you do. so much going for you, just needs a bit of work thats all xxxx

what I wouldn't do for your youth girl x lol

it's nice to see you're still posting.

Rodders

Hi all

Thanks to Steve and Rodders for their kind words.

You bring a tear to my eye steve with your kind words. I'm glad you are my friend. You've helped me just as much as I helped you if not more.

I'm glad we're doing so well. Even if we are skint 🙂

Take care all

Claire xxx

hi claire you are doing really well honey keep it up... gawd i cudnt live off 33 quid for a month hope you mange with it hun x

Hello all

Am back again and its not without regret unfortunatley. had the slip that i almost anticipated. just couldn't quite make it for the self exclusion form 🙁 anyway as a christmas present to me, at my request my sister went to get me the form. filled it in and will return it saturday. feel better for making the decision and wanting to do it. am tired of this life and the unhappy person it makes me. need to take it from my own hands, I have no control. I know this.

Merry christmas all, take care

Claire xxx