I'm 48 years into this life and 3 years ago, I lost everything to the curse that has followed me through life since the age of 21. I beat the demons for about a year, but then the curse came back destroying my hopes and dreams of a new life. I have died already this past year a thousand times in my mind and I know its only a matter of time until I give in. I think of everything I have lost, house , wife , kids, jobs and think what a waste. I am lonely and only get by each week, each day the frustration of the demons makes me feel sick until I satisfy the urges that grip me.
Yours is a truly heartbreaking story and I am by no means in any position to fully advise you on what to do. I myself am currently at the point of losing everything and know if I don't stop now its over for me. I have tried to quit so many times but since finding this wonderful site I now believe it is possible. Read diaries, get blocks in place, listen to the priceless advice that will come your way from those better placed than me. But most of all don't give up, you can have some great years ahead of you and by coming here you have made a vital step.
keep posting, I wish you all the strength in the world.
Mark
Jim
You have come to the best place for recovery as their is no better person to advise you then someone who has beaten this addiction for a long time, please continue with your diary as you will receive all the help you need from the great people on here. Its never too late to turn your life around, I truly wish you all the best.
Fella welcome to the forum
A place full of like minded folk who simply want to see you succeed in arresting the destructive gambling from your life.
I had a huge lump in my throat reading your thread,f**k my friend that quite easily could be me,I gambled for 20+ years to the point where I was one day from reposession,one day from losing everything I hold dear,all because I was compelled to gamble upon everything in my life.
I hope you find solice in the form of recovery,I hope it allows you to build some bridges,for two and a half years now I have been repairing the huge damage caused by my selfish actions not just financially but emotionally.
Take all the help on offer fella,life can become more than just a function
At 48 you really can have a whole life ahead of you,I am sure with a great deal more to give it.
f**k I cashed in everything I owned into gambling tokens,chasing something that was impossible
Why??
Because like you I am a compulsive gambler.
today I am 'in recovery'
With irony it makes me into what I believed I chased for all those years
A WINNER
It is on offer for you to
Abstain and maintain
Duncs stepping forward never back
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