i absolutely love..... ....not gambling

Hi Dan, thanks for your post. You and I both know that I've been a full on idiot. I really don't know why I did it. Maybe I had subconsciously slipped back into my old mind set. It's cost us our relationship for the time being. It's time to rebuild. I hope it's acted as a reminder to everybody with partners that it's an ongoing recovery that doesn't just stop once we stop gambling.

It's great to see you slowly getting the debts down. I guess the debts are always there as a reminder...which can't be a bad thing. Thanks again for your comments. Sometimes you need somebody to give you that kick up the a**e. Take care buddy and thanks again. Russ

Hi Dan.

Thanks for the posts on my diary the other day. I did check in before heading off to the races and it was nice to see your messages.

Well done on your continued progress. It is so good to be able to say that we have not had a bet this year.

Keep it up Dan and thanks again.

Thanks so much for your post on my diary which has made me even more determined to leave this online madness.

Great to see that you are now around the 6 month mark and that your debts are reducing each day.

That day when we are debt free will come for both of us!

GT

Keith, Russ, Curly, GT,

Thank you for posting, I stop by and read far more then I actually post but there is something heartwarming and touching about knowing others who suffer in the same way as I, care enough about others to offer such support.

I've said it before but whilst I would never say this forum is perfect, I really do appreciate having somewhere to come and offload my thoughts.

I am about to hit 28 weeks since my last bet, It feels exhilarating to think that for the first time in 14+ years I have actually managed a suistained absence from gambling,

I have a long long way to go, I still feel the pain and damage I have caused to my wife and family on a daily basis. I'm currently spending about an hour a night on the net, looking at two things I'd like to buy, I can't afford them, for one simple reason, I gambled and lost, I was greedy, I lacked discipline, I lost control and I gambled. I chose to seek a quick win, I felt justified in believing that I would win because, I'm actually quite a decent, selfless guy who busts his gut at work. Why shouldn't it be me, why shouldn't I be the one who gets 'lucky'.

Actually I am lucky, I have an amazing wife who has stood by me, I have a job, I have pretty good health, albeit I should be running and not typing!! wont even mention the marmite cashews I've just eaten!

ahhhh where am I going with this post, I dont know, I dont really care, I'm just in the mood to empty my mind.

I have a character trait that I really dislike, I really suffer from a low attention span and a dislike of anything repeated, as far as self discipline goes, I'm about as useful as one of those chocolate teapots.

Even now I have soooooo much work I shoudl be doing and instead I've spent the last hour playing an online golf game, just because I can

I don't like being like this, I hate the fact I lost so much of my life to gambling, I despise the opportunities in life I have spurned through gambling but I am what I am, life is what it is. All I can do know, is my best, I want to repay ever penny I owe, I want to own £1 of my own money, I want to give my wife the life she so wants.

28 weeks without betting so much as a penny, life is truly better without it,

On the radio earlier was a discussion about the austerity measures, one caller said, 'we're simply all in this together, we should all be pulling together as a nation'

wouldn't that be awesome/ a human race that helped each other.

oh well, at least we have everyone on here to support each other.

Apologies if you have chosen to lose the last four hours of your life reading this entry, think I'm even going to change my title on the back of it but its far to say my mind is a bit clearer know and so I must return to my work and try and get some more done before turing in for the night.

As always, thank you to everyone for being so open on these forums and best wishes to all

regards

dan

Dan

Thanks for post and well done on the 28 weeks and I'm pleased for you if you feel your life has improved so much with not gambling.

Sounds like you have been given a second chance at life and you are taking it.

Agree with you re this being a good Forum in general, there are some characters on here who only want to cause trouble and boost their own egos but I'm sure you'll identify them and ignore them and talk to the genuine ones who want to exchange experiences and help each other.

Sounds like you have been given a second chance at life and you are taking it

I hope so captain, I've gone through phases of remembering things said on here, I'll try and keep this thought at the forefront of my mind for now

some great reading Dan and thanks for your well wishes. .28 weeks superb mate. .reading your diary from the start i just knew you were here for the long term. .Keep it going mate impressive stuff we can do this 😉

Hi Dan... well done on your gambling free time and thank you for your recent support. There was something that you said in my diary that struck accord. Ive shelled out the best part of £40 recently on pre-scription medecines and pain killers. If i was gambling I simply would not have had the money to do that. Simple as.

I relate to your thoughts on low attention span. I know I flit from one thing to another to another and then back to the first, idling away time doing things that don't really add any value or have any purpose in my life. The two exceptions to this are.. reading and writing on here and going running. I find I am fairly disciplined with this, probably because i enjoy it. But other areas of my life that need attention and focus just don't get a look in and i will do anything to avoid them... including going into a dreamy like state and doing nothing. Parrallels with my gambling I think.

Anyway enough rambling for me. From what ive read your doing just fine. Regards.. S.A 🙂

SA thanks for the post, hope your pain is a bit more under control/bearable..

I have an interesting one, I'd really appreciate some feedback...

Having gone 6 months gamble free, I'm still in mountains of debt but its as under control as I can get it - I saw a bulk purchase on a auction site that I knew I could split and make a good return on. The auction is still running but im already in profit and looking likely that i'll double up at least.

initial outlay was around £100 so not huge but still significant considering debt.

So talking to my wife about what to do next, use money to buy soemthing for me/her us both or use it to buy and sell soemthing else - bascially 'write the money off' and see what I can do with it

finally I get to the interesting conundrum, my Wife is a bit concerned that I'm effectively 'gambling' with money - she's happy for me to do it but wonders whether its likely to trigger those quick win demons in my mind, potentially jeopordising my abstinance.

Has anyone here found a buying/selling culture has encouraged them to gamble, or just what are your thoughts?

and yes I knwo if I buy/sell I could buy a dud and lose all the money but at the same time I'm not talking about a life changing sum

so any thoughts?

Hi

Well done on 6 months, yes we will certainly swap emails. I am in a pact with curly, the funny thing is he has just done 6 months also.

In December we will all reach 1 year, then onto 2nd year. I am just like yourself, keeping 'little' milestones, i.e. 200 days, 225 days. Hey if it keeps the us from not gambling - bring it on baby.

Shaun

Thanks for post Dan, appreciate it, good input to discussion. Sorry I infuriate you. For what it's worth, you are not one of the preachers I referred to, I am always pleased to hear from you.

Well done on continued abstinence.

Good point about this bulk purchase. I frequently visit car boot sales to look for items either to sell on or to keep for myself.

I have been successful many, many times because I know what to look for. But what I do remember is that I never, ever spend more that what I can afford. And I'm talking about tiny, tiny amounts of money, no more than £2!

I have turned 50p items into a tenner and yes, I have turned 50p items into nothing (but I may get that 50p back when I do a car boot sale myself).

Your wife is right, I would suggest being very, very careful about this £100 outlay. Don't forget to consider online fees and postage as in the long term, all this effort may not pay out.

Hope this helps.

GT

A slightly delayed response, but thanks for the comments, well my one buy and sale effort worked well but havent ventured down that route again yet, very happy to report no gambling, feels good but the second I stop and think about it I get quite scared, I know I'm only one bet away from imploding, take care all

Hi Dan,

Glad to hear that the bulk purchase went well. I'd still be very aware before going down that route again.

We, as CGs, are just one bet away from imploding - always worth remembering this.

GT

GT thanks again and I think your right, although my work ethic and enthusiasm would always do me well in buying and selling my lack of control/discipline plus my desire for a quick quid will always leave me vulnerable, exactly the same traits that leave me exposed to my gambling addiction, fornow at least I'm staying away from both,

Thanks for your thoughts and advice, dan