i absolutely love..... ....not gambling

know how you feel about the wife m8. would do anythink in the world for hir, aften all she has done for me in the last 6 months.

i asked hir for cash for cigs this morning (£6)

she give me hir card,she give me a kiss, look at me and sead, its time you got your own stuff.

6 months ago this would of been the end of us. but today i have been to the shops, got my cigs and come home.

are card is back and i am strong.

life is good and its down to the love of a beautiful woman, who for some unknown reson, loves a scumbag.

stay strong for hir m8

itsme

ade, thanks for the post, hope mine did the trick for you,

its me, thats great news about the shopping trip

just a quick post to myself to remind myself that I'm still gamble free and still loving it

second payday today, really glad to be on here and not trying to gamble,

Have just done some internet banking and paid out for credit card debt, need new car tax, and two new tyres on my car, so by the time my other monthly bills come out Ill be back to having no money left, so part of me feels depressed and you can sense the internal gambling voice trying to break through but im remembering what it feels like when I use the bill money to gamble and then have to desperately find a way to get some more funds,

or waiting for a payday reloan to hit my account just so that I could pay the minimum payments

got to pay for a counsellor this month as well, but will be good to get that process under way

dan.....no need to pay for counselling mate...give gamcare a call...they maybe funded by gambling industry but they provide FREE counselling 😉 keep going friend its a constant fight against bills loans etc but eventually gamble free we will get there.....keep up your impressive revovery,we can do this 🙂

hi dan

nice to see you doing well, and paying them bill. getting the car done. all good stuff m8.

and if your skint. so what. you be skint anyway.just with no bill payed,strees, and know dow't,lyeing to peopel to get the money to pay bills. you have done grate. i am happy for you.now pay the bills and be skint becouse thats how life is and not becouse you made it that way

a big well done

itsme

wp and its me, thanks for the posts.

wp, as strange as this sounds, considering my debt and how long it will take me to get out of it I feel part of my continued recovery is to pay for a counsellor, as I hand over the money it will be yet another reminder of just what a mess I have got into through gambling, I don't envisage using the same counsellor for the rest of my life but would also like to build up a relationship with one person, who also has a duty to provide me with a service, so thanks for the gamcare advice but I am going to use this other counsellor, at least a couple of times to see how it goes

still no gambles for me and plenty of 'opportunity' and definately lots of reasons i would previously used as a 'motive'

just realised that its also thrusday today so thats another week without a gamble, think thats eight now, so 54 days, was going to get myself a beer as well after 50, oh well I'll get two beers and keep them for day 100!

take care all

dan

Good to read your still going strong Dan,i hope you get something positive from your counselling sessions (when they commence).

Seano.

Thanks seano,

Another day without being tempted, it's great not gambling! If haven't quit yet or are in the early stages of doing so, then take the plunge, make the one last bet of backing yourself, it's the one bet that you can control the outcome of. I get down, feel depressed and have a long long road ahead of me but I hope I never go back, I never want to waste a penny more through gambling, hope everyone is doing well, whichever method of recovery you are choosing to use.

monday now, a day off work, a few pounds in the bank, but none gambled, nor will it be.

i cannot win because i cannot stop

first counselling session today, I liked it, I am going back again next week, so hopefully that will start to take some direction now, its amazing to listen to someone else feedback on how my story comes across

think i will get on ok with the counsellor, which is one of the important thing sfor me, if I dont feel like I trust the counsellor or I dont like their style, then I would struggle to open up

Good to read that you gelled with your counsellor Dan,i sincerely hope you gain a lot of strength from the sessions.Stay strong.

Seano.

thanks for the posts guys, just a quick update to myself, lots to think about following this weeks counselling, which has been good, if a bit of a culture shock to think of the times in my past that Ive built up as something special, well actually they may have led to some of my insecurities, which in turn have allowed me to create a weak side to my character.

every bet ive placed has been my decision and no-one elses but as I continue to walk round in a clearer state of mind, I get scared by just how many opporunities there are to gamble

buying a pint of milk, walk past a bookmakers, past a newsagents (lottery) into a small supermarket, lottery again

then past library, internet gaming,

then back home, again internet gaming

and if in between these stops I get bored, I could use the phone to gamble

Im glad that im so aware at the moment of just what constitutes gambling and just how concious I need to be of my surroundings and of those oportunities so that I can conciously choose to not gamble

still today marks the start of another whole week ( my last gamble was on a thursday)

of the top of my head I think its now 9 weeks or 63 days, might be 8 weeks, will have to reread my diary, either way my title says it all to me really, I really am loving not gambling

i cannot win because i cannot stop

Hi Dan and great stuff on the gambling free time! Glad that your loving it 🙂

Yes, your right gambling is everywhere but at the end of the day we make that final choice to gamble or not to gamble.

Counselling sure can help. I loved having somebody listen to me unconditionally it helped me to understand myself a little better even if I still struggle sometimes to change the bits about myself that i want to change.

Thanks for your support. By the way my flat is still a bit S****y the cleaning is still a work in progress lol.. happy days.. S.A

Yes, Dan, there are far too many opportunities to gamble big in a matter of minutes nowadays. I once walked for around 30 minutes in London and counted around 16 bookies.

Madness.

It just goes to show how important it is for us to be able to make that right choice.

That (along with as many blocks as we can get in) really is the only way forward.

GT

s.a., Gt, thanks for dropping by,

I talked to my counsellor last week about the number of outlets for gambling and she admitted she was horrified by it as well, and been watching more tv than normal recently, every other ad seems to be for a casino or online 'bingo' site

I heard one phrase earlier about 'stop dreaming and start playing' - sent shivers down my spine.

I wish I had the guts to make more of a stand, fathers for justice style!

It just seems to be getting worse and worse with no sign of any let up

I can see a day whereby the four fobt per shop is relaxed under 'eu' constraint of trade or something and the larger stores ending up with 10-12 machines, all of which would be filled by 'zombies'

Also jsut been reading some other diaries, easylifes recent experience struck home with me, worth stopping by for a read if you havent already

anyway I am continuing to love life without gambling - things remain a struggle with very little money for anything other than essentials, a big week of work coming up and am nursing injuries from my weekends sporting activities so am going to watch 30 mins of the superbowl and then turn in for a reasonably early night

take care all

dan