Hi all
I first opened my account here in 2009 and my last post was 2012.
My daughter is now 3 and we sold our last house and bought a bigger one and got completely out of my £30k debt that I had in 2011. However although I was doing really well I had a big slip in April 2014 and lost about £500 but I won £650 over Xmas and then again everything was great until yesterday.
I lost about £50 on the horses, then bet another £50 on the tennis to win everything back. This lost, so I was then £100 down. I then bet £100 on roulette, then another £100. At one point I got the £200 back but still would have been £100 so carried on. I then lost this £200 and found myself depositing a further £300 in total.
I lost it all. £600 over Sat/Sun. Just so gutted. I didnt get myself in debt as it just came out of savings and I wont ever get myself back in debt but thats not the point.
Perhaps the loss was a blessing in disguise as I was P**sed with myself that I have said that other than the lottery I play I am not doing anything else.
This weekend started with me wanting to place a £2 football bet and I came out of the bookie having spent £50!
It has to stop for good.
Hi Danny its been two years since ive been here similar story to yourself how my wkend went. Hopefully it all goes right for you this time.
It is annoying as i see my friends able to cope with a few pounds here and there yet I have to go stupid all out. Its embarrassing.
The thing I find the weirdest/annoying is that I can go shopping or want to buy something and think "no i wont spend/waste that £20" on this or that, yet can (un)happily waste hundreds on online slots or casinos. £500 on roulette over the weekend could have bought me no end of stuff, yet had I spent it on other things I would have been annoyed with myself for spending it but at least I would have had something to show for it.
I am now no longer in debt, have the house I have always wanted and some money in savings, it is time to leave these sites and the bookies behind me and keep increasing that pot of savings rather than the alternative.
I dont know why I never learn, I suppose it is because I have a few months of spending nothing and then thinking I am "cured" and can control it. Wrong.
Over Christmas having £1k in the balance of an online casino but having to meet wager requirements annoyed me so I ended up with a lot less than this and in a cloud of smoke one month later it is all gone.
This time it has given me the proper wake up call needed. I have been in much lower and darker places in my gambling life but now is the time to stop. And stop for good.
Today i went and opened up online accounts with firms that i have not self exclued from and then straight away self exclude. so as far as i know there is no sports betting company left i could open an account with. I understand what your saying going into a shop to buy clothes and look at the price and say not a chance then go on line and blow triple the price of clothes with one click. When i tried to stop the last time i didn't put this much work in so hopefully this time i can stop. Think i have to get rid of my smart phone betting adds are every where just till i get control of my life again.
It is so annoying.
Yesterday deposited £300 in order to win back the £100 I lost. At one point had £350 so wasn't far off I just wish I had cashed out. Lost it all. Another £200 in, got back to £200. Withdrew, reversed withdrawal an hour later, lost it all. That's £600 all in. It's crazy how annoyed I was at £100 down then lost all that extra trying to get it back.
I also read these "big wins" people have had in their recovery diaries. I never even got one. Just huge losses. Then again, suppose I had won the £100 back with the £300 deposit would I have been able to stop? Inevitably I would have lost it or some other amount then wouldn't have come back to this site for some clarity.
Finally - how annoying are all the verification hoops these online casinos make you go through when you do want to withdraw - they don't give a monkeys who you are when taking your cash. Also "withdrawal reversal" one of the most evil things to exist (second to FOBTs).
Hi Danny,
The only big wins I see in the forum, are the days that fellow soldiers are mounting up, every single day we abstain is a big win,
Because it really is the only way we can win.
Take care
Suzanne xx
Hi Danny,
Firstly well done on coming back here so soon after having a relapse. It takes guts to do that. I know that you are annoyed with yourself for falling back into gambling and the sad chase that follows the intial loss is embarrassing to admit to. But you've been here before and recovered so there's no reason why you cannot get back on track and learn more from this bad experience to make you stronger.
What happened at the weekend is now history. Forget it. It's gone. Finished. f*****G annoying, I know mate. But it's gone.
Now you have to focus on the future and get back to basics. One day at a time is enough to start with. You CAN do it my friend.
Stop beating yourself up about the relapse and move on.
Wishing you all the best mate.
Keep strong, and keep posting
Ade
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