Killing the Zombie

So Louis , maybe CBE stands for " Can buy Everything " or " Cheekiest Bitc.h Ever " ?.

Put it on a sticky and see if there are any additions !

Have a good one Buddy !

Easy Louis ......Forum Admin won't like that. ....

It wouldn't happen in North Korea.

Kim Jong Un rules ok ....

Hi, Louis,

I'm ok, thanks, hope you are too, am not worried about personal insults.

Are there any CEOs from the brewing industry on the list? Or the tobacco industry?

Everyone's responsible for what they do but it's not nice to put obstacles in the path of a blind person.

CW

Hi Louis,

Thanks for your post. Yup, self awareness, i guess you're right...just need to make sure steps i put in practice are on the correct road forward.

Hope all is well with yourself.

Look after yourself and yours...lil angel yet to see the beautiful colours life has to offer ☺...share it unconditionally

Thanks Sandra

Although I generally avoid the posters in question I found myself reading too much of their stuff recently. I've noticed this labelling of a group, of which I appear to be in, as gloomy/miserable and depressed. Then there's a mocking of said people in this group on the basis of this apparent depression. I had a few thoughts about this

a) if I want to have banter, I have it with people in this crazy place I call 'real life'. I do it with people who have 3 dimensions -they talk and everything.

b) believe it or not, I come on this forum to write and learn about matters which relate to gambling and addiction. I've got quite a broad interpretation here but it doesn't extend to endless 'banter'. Again if that's what you want then why not try it in real life - it works really well

c) if you really think I or another is depressed, why the mockery? That's pretty sick! Which vulnerable group you gona use for your attack next? Or is it just a cheap jibe to demonise people who threaten you. Threaten you with that most hurtful of all weapon..a different point of view

d) slaging of another addict for mental health difficulties, is a tad ironic. But then it allows the individual to keep alive the 'gambling in a vacuum' belief. That, unlike 'those' sick $####r's over there- there's nothing wrong with me as a person (I was just an addict).

Louis

Hi Louis,

Just seen ur post on Dan's thread. He kindly informed me through text that he is banned.
Sad thruth...even no explanation from Gods here 🙁

Ps..like your last post! Honesty goes long way...( that's only if you manage to keep it public & not get moderated)

Stay calm and at peace. All the best

S x

Was originally gona post on another thread but got a bit 'ranty'.

I'm not sure whether addiction is an illness. If there's an illness analogy to be had - then addiction is a symptom. In the same way that a sore throat might be a symptom of having the flu.

I'm pretty sure that gambling is not in and of itself 'the issue'. If you manage to not gamble and change nothing else, then you're unlikely to have gotten to the root of things and are probably still struggling with yourself, albeit not gambling.

In my own experience, and from what I can see of others on here, gambling is a failure to deal with difficult thoughts and emotions. This leads to disconnection from life and a life ruled by fear - a fear of not being able to look at yourself in the mirror. A refusal to accept our vulnerabilities.

Gambling is one part of fear based behaviour. Avoid painful feelings (sometimes good as well as bad)=repression=disconnected from life and values=real life is more scary than ever=ouch don't like that need to escape more than ever....

All these behaviours are ultimately based around fear.

(help me I'm scared. I don't know what's happened to me. I never thought life would be this hard. But I can't say anything people will finally realise that I'm a failure. I would rather die. Shut up. I'm strong, I'm different, there's nothing wrong with me anyway, just gona have a quick spin).

----------------------------------

Had a big heart 2 heart with partner today. Realised, largely through her telling me ; ), that I was in quite an anxious state about impending arrival of baby. This was manifesting itself in seeing things as a series of hurdles - our flat's too small, how am I gona work without sleep, how do I get the pram up the stairs,as well as more general denial.

My partner was unhappy as she's been getting much more excited than me. I think my anxiety stems from a failure to engage with my emotions. I'm happy about the birth and think it will ultimately be totally amazing. But my failure to properly engage is leading to this kind of low level anxiousness and worrying behaviour. Glad I've had this realisation - which I only had after I stopped arguing the toss and accepted how I was feeling and behaving (phew what a relief). Yes it's f*****g scary. Engage with that fear fully and make as much room for it as necessary - don't repress it and stew in it.

Hi, Louis,

Small fry do bring about big changes and the sheer volume of paraphernalia that goes with one baby is incredible, your worries sound realistic - but with the broken nights and disruption comes your baby. Your baby. And that is worth getting excited about.

Sounds like it's a question of finding the right balance, focusing on the positives as well as the negatives. Have a bit of faith in yourself, especially at 2.00 in the morning. And 4.00 in the morning...

BW,

CW

Your a good man Louis. And the worries your going through reflect that.

We keep hearing ' nothing changes, if nothing changes ' and your on the threshold of one massive change, all this with addressing your gambling, newly qualified and embarking on your correar, there has to be an element of human fear of the unknown.

The realisation your experiencing is more proof that your heading in the right direction

Good on you ..

Gambling is indeed a symptom & not the illness. Emotional health is the illness. Without addressing the instigator of the symptoms its of little surprise most will return to gambling once the symptoms(having debt) vanish. Its easy to stop, i stopped a thousand & one times. Its the not starting again which is tricky. You have found ACT & for me the 12 Steps have allowed me to deal with the secrecy & shame that keep many locked in to the behaviour.

As to new babies. Lol good luck! An emotional time for all. Keep communicating how you feel & all will be well.

You will do fine Louis x

Louis, Post from your own heart, listen folks that have not got this addiction would have the same anxiety, this is normal. But I get 100% what you are saying, we know anything that happens to us makes us think about our addiction, good or bad, but that dear Louis its the addiction trying it hardest to latch on. Your thoughts on your post I understand,you are looking at this rationally and head on and thank you for inspiring me today on your thoughts.

Every father to be wil be thinking those thoughts, it's natural anxiety, but you have sussed it, a gift that recovery gives you:))

Suzanne xxx

Hey Louis, your post reminded me of a conversation I had with a colleague once...He said that there's nothing more incredible than the unconditional love of a child! Wasn't enough to convince me to have any but I think that you having someone who clearly cannot be judging you may just be the proof that you need to know that you are loveable 🙂

Totes amazing & good to see you being able to face your fears - ODAAT

Hey Louis , sorry buddy I'm off now but just had one last LOL at your post to Dan , " our leader in exile" really ?

Now I know it's time to move on ! .

Lol @ Alan - you say what a lot of us think my friend. :))