Well it happened I got my wish really to get caught out and to have to deal with everything properly. I feel I have the tools this time to cope but don't want to be complacent at the same time as well. It's going well so far but I don't like to say never but also not sure if never saying never is an unhelpful attitude.
Lovely to see you making the leap 🙂
It's bed time for me now but I will be keeping an eye out for Diary Post 2 - ODAAT
Thanks for sharing, I look forward to the next part and hope that by you starting your story right at the beginning it helps you, best wishes x
Following your diary. I have read a lot of your posts and would like to know more of your journey.
Thanks for sharing. The name of your diary pulled me in. I remember a Joke a teacher told me at school about a german dish washer called Hans and a mild green hairy lipped squid!
I was about 15 when I got introduced to gambling at the races on boxing day. I think I won 40 squid from a tenner. The following year I was driving myself there on a moped and pretenting I was part of a family I didn't know so I could get in for free, to gamble all day. I won 250. The following day I was walking along the canal and a figure started coming towards me on the tow path, I couldn't see his face and he aknowledge me. I said alright. I swear that was my introduction to the devil.
Hans that does dishes. My introduction to the whole gambling lark was down at Blackpool on the bandits, I remember it well I just wish I had used that pain to make not gambling stick earlier.
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Hello Allainepo, thank you for the post on my diary, I'm going to leave the title as it is, like you say, it's how low I felt when I first found this site. I've just been catching up on your diary and had to smile as I read post 6. I try to do nice little things each day, like when I'm driving and I let people out who are stuck in side roads, I get annoyed if they don't wave a thank you or flash the lights, it's just courtesy and costs nothing. Last week was horrid at work, from the lady being given 6 weeks to live who was only 30 years old, the people using ambulances for a stubbed toe (able bodied 21 year old) who ended up verbally abusing my colleague I could relate to wanting to smash him one. Big well done on your gf days they are mounting up, writing down our past can help with closure and understanding, helping us to have a better future. I'm sure I've said this before, you write such caring, thoughtful posts to people, you should be proud of how far you have come. Best wishes x
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Love reading our posts. You keep things very close to your chest and it has taken you some time... I would love to hear more about your journey and what led to where you are now.
You post so much for others and I like to see you concentrate on you but you dont do it often enough !
Am I complaining ... Hell yes 🙂
I can resonate with what you say. In particular post oh gosh were is the hashtag... 10
Really feel for you. The levels or should I say the avenues you went down, I did to. Not from work but much worse at my gambling peak.
Keep looking out for you x
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