Mr Grumpy: Round 3 and a half

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kvDPYOe-7nI

Day: 5 of 5

Ok... had a few southies... yes ... already... Its break up time. A very very busy last 2 weeks, think about 7 of the last 10 working days have been 12 hours +... one was 15... before I got home... so a few southies is not undeserving in my book. leavers service went very well... and, ... the pressies I got amazed me......

£50 golfing vouchers

Footjoy Dryjoy golf shoes

Odessey 2 ball putter

I sh it you not... couldn't believe it... and a bottle of SC.. and some wine... W T f

So... bathing in my own glory.... I found myself thinking about gambling.. OUCH.

Checked to see if blocks were in place.. they were...but felt disappointed.

What a f*****g rollercoaster this ride is. You feel down.... think about it.... You feel up... think about it..? The shiny ones "middle" looks like a beautiful place to me at the moment.

So.. I feel like a gamble.... but can't... so a big yippee there, and the blocks will allow me to wake up in the morning and say Thank f**k. Think I will carry on drinking... will no doubt check the blocks again later... and they will do their job... and I can rest assured that i will not gamble tonight... but i feel like it...

Next monday is "G" day... the day that I either commit to golf for the summer, or realise I can't afford it... its a big decision and not as simple as "beans on toast for a few weeks"... but I know that if I can... I will.

Think I'll post lots of music tonight... probably deja vu from the last time... but it is my diary... hope it helps me tonight.

Hope all is well for all others..

Jon

PS: There's a bit in Mort where DEATH goes gambling in his search for "fun"... playing craps... funny as hell... but can't be bothered typing it all out.

Thank fooooooook for blocks .

Oh and alka sheltza , think you might be needing that in the morning.

The praise the prezzies , a well deserved recognition of all the effort you put in.

Enjoy your SC , enjoy your music .

Stay strong !!

Shiny xxxxxxxxxx

Cheers Shiny.

Listening to my non gambling song... the one that hurts.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PCSFz_YycYA

Now moving on to my ultimate chill song... listen... give it a chance... it's .. dare I say it... beautiful.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlK6GN4oJgU

Moving on to major chill now with Jeff...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VC02wGj5gPw

21.44 getting heavier... going back in time... not long before i start dancin'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UNilsLf6eW4

Getting my dfancin shoes on...

Think this guy is the greatest vocalist

http://www.youtube.com/watch?…T_GgUev8s&feature=related

Mornin Jon, trying to catch up on things here, been busy too. Sounds like you've had a rewarding week. Loved Alice Cooper. Thank heavens for barriers and their protection. Enjoy your rest you've earned it. Oh you got some great prezzies there btw, well jealous. Only thing the kids/school gave me was nits/high blood pressure/ticks/anxiety/insanity and a broken mug.

Choose life, choose golf

Steg

I would go for the golf, mate. You have worked hard and you are well into your recovery journey.

Rewards are here for us CGs to take and spending lots of time playing golf can only help combat the boredom that you may experience over the summer holidays.

Enjoy your weekend.

NT

Day: 2 of 2

Just about got my breath back after what has been the hardest, tiring, fun last two weeks ever.

Been up since 6... don't seem to be able to lie in like in the good old days... when lie ins could, given the right recipe, last till 4 in the afternoon. Went Carbooting... got myself loads of golf balls, ( pro v 1's 10p each... hahahahaha ).. then went to the driving range, followed by a walk round the ajoining par 3, 9 hole course. A bit stiff now, but ready for the real thing... which I AM going to do tomorrow. Decided to get the contract... just the Mon - Thurs one... so should be spending the next 6 weeks there, Mon - Thurs that is. Last year I lost about a stone and a half during the 6 weeks. Two rounds a day... quite a lot of walking involved.. a lot of it in a Zig-Zag pattern unfortunately.

No thoughts of gambling since fri night... the blocks did their job.

I have had to force myself to post though... maybe just a phase I am going through, but feeling less inclined to do so at the moment. The six weeks holiday makes me feel a little nervous... maybe that will settle once I have handed over the dosh and paid for the golf. It will give me less time to think about thinking about it.

Hope all is well in your world.

Staying strong for a happier future.

Jon

“And these are your reasons, my lord?"

"Do you think I have others?" said Lord Vetinari. "My motives, as ever, are entirely transparent."

Hughnon reflected that 'entirely transparent' meant either that you could see right through them or that you couldn't see them at all.” ― Terry Pratchett, The Truth

PS:

Time for rest and relaxation and the golf sounds a great idea....

All golfed out up here as a few of the neighbours been to the Open in Blackpool..(plus I live virtually on a golf course..so I cant get away lol)

Also have quite a collection of golf balls in my cupboard as my dog keep finding them when we go on walks...

keep posting Jon...sometimes when you feel least like iit is when you need to post more.....

take care

R and D xx

ps...Big Mike Mcdonald fan also..".Sweet Freedom "also fantastic ..tune x

Good morning ,

When I read your post yesterday , I was in two minds how to answer it.

I could in true BB style write :

Yo Jon,

So happy you had a good day at the range , great find at the boot sale .

Pleased you decided to pay your golf membership ,

And remember to stay strong .

Or I could write what I really think. I left it to ponder and have decided to write what I really think. So if I am out of order or misinterpreted things please know I write this cause I care , and take or leave it because ultimately the choice is yours.

I suppose alarm bells rung when you tested the blocks on your computer the other night . But they held fast so that's great. Then another alarm bell rung when you said yesterday you were loosing the inclination to post.

The two together worry me a bit . Along with the fact you are concerned about this 6 week holiday.

All I can say is that at one point during my addiction I became heavily involved with Internet gambling, but had blocks put in place which stopped that . But I still needed my fix especially when I had been drinking so found another way to gamble. Believing at the time it would only be the odd 10 but it built up and up until it all but consumed me .

Our fooooooking addictive mind will play tricks on us to try to lull us back in.

All I ask is that you be on your guard ,

Now go out wack a few balls, and enjoy the sunshine

Shiny xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Day: 1 of 5

So... paid golf fees... thats me golfing 4 days a week. However my first venture out this morning has not yielded a good result.

New Golf shoes -------> 2 massive blisters on my heels..... ripped blisters... painful.

So I came home after 9 holes... googled "Blisters on heels" to find out I shouldn't have ripped the skin off... which I did. Then at the bottom of the advice I read these calming "TIPS":

"Take blisters, especially opened blisters, seriously. Infections caused by blisters can lead to serious problems, including death of vital tissue, amputation and even death."

So... if I never post again, you'll know... I died of "Blisters"... not the most heroic way to leave this world.. but it now seems like a possibility.

Jon

Hi Jon,

Just catching up on posts.

Blisters !!!! I thought you was a big roughty toughty bloke, Im sure it wont resort to amputation, try soaking them in walm salt water they wont make them any better but they will make you dance around like a lunatic for a while, which would be hugely amusing....

So the golf fee is paid then eh ? You took the plunge ? Brave and maybe wise move ? If you dont try you dont know ?.

I was reading your post on friday and i think like shiny it worried me slightly your attempt to try and see if the blocks were in place is kind of like dancing with the devil... In the cold light of day you can see clearer, in the haze of drink its not always easy to make the right choice.

I hope you find some renewed enthusisam soon, maybe it will come from the golf, Stop being a wuss and get on with it (refering to the blisters there ;).

Enjoy your day, Hop a long lol

Blondie x

To the Blonde One

These are not just any old blisters... these are the M&S of Blisters:

Thats just one.... makes The Stegs "flea bite" pale into insignificance if you ask me....

Raw... is not a strong enough word... it needs a new word...Kinraw..?

neee norrrr neee norrr, call the ambulance..... kinhell john!! What did i tell you about that pink wig and those 6 inch heals, there not really appropriate for the golf course 😉

I think amputation could be a real possibility lol.... Not sure which one is worse your foot or stegs leg...

Your could always do a zola bud equivalant with golf... Bare foot ?

Blondie x