My gamble free journey

I've got no advice to give you Bop5 except my own personal experience. I had a massive issue with Roulette. I still don't understand it to be honest, even after a year of very expensive private therapy for (a seperate but linked) anxiety issue.

I could and still can (although I can't be bothered) bet on football/horses, but online roulette was absolute Skynet human emotional and financial apocalypse for me!

I agree with you about GA - we won't find ourselves popular around these parts for pointing out the 'religious' aspect so best not to get into it.

Problem with GA: I don't think it's helpful to say "I have no control over the great god Gamblor" and then sit back like a big fat baby, or helpful to vomit out all our mistakes to anyone we've ever met who might've been impacted by our gambling, in an ultimately selfish move to make ourselves feel better without a care for how it might affect them, or how it might affect our careers. Personal honesty is key though to those closest to us, no question about that. But going back through your history of anyone who your gambling had impacted - nah!

That's where GA always got a bit too 'culty' for me. (And the way that some people defend it just goes go to show how much of a brainwashing cult it can be).

The urges are killer.

The urges are because addiction is an emotional illness. It was never about the money. It was always about dopamine release, the feeling we are "winners" - even if for a second. The rush, the buzz.

Nothing in 'normal' day-to-day life can hope to replace that rush. So the question then becomes how can you replace that buzz your brain seeks without it being so self-destructive?

Alcohol is what I used/use - works pretty good, but if I'm honest I've now replaced one addiction for another.

Certainly install GAMBLOCK immediately onto all your devices. I haven't bet for a few years now, but installed it last month for the maximum 5yrs and it totally works for me when I'm tempted. 100%

Keeping it real - my booze addiction is costing me a lot less than my gambling addiction!

Both are terrible of course.

But having no money will crush you quicker than not having a bottle of cheap rioja.

Max

ALN - by your own words I am aware of your mental health issues that run comorbidly with your gambling problem, so I'm loathed to respond to you without causing offence as you are clearly a "vulnerable" person. I'm also aware how you flounce off the Gamcare site when anyone challenges your opinion.

So I don't really know what to say?

I'm not still gambling.

I am still drinking.

I hope you are well. But your "kill or cure" advice to stop watching anything to do with sport is frankly ridiculous, not living in the real world, laughable.

Take that with a pinch of salt (or pepper) as suits.

Max

ALN wrote: Max, if I have you wrong I apologise, but you constantly refer to your football accumulators. If this refers to the past then please advise and I'll delete my comment.

Eh?

Hi Bop,

Welcome to the forum.

Reference your point about dealing with urges - you are on Day 2 so you will have urges and sleepless nights and your brain will be a complete mess. This is all temporary and we have all experienced this. It will ease off if given time. Quitting anything addictive is always toughest at the beginning but it gets easier and life gets better.

A long time ago I found out that the best way to tackle urges was to have no access to money. I only had to do this for a short time but it got me through the first few months. I simply didn’t take a bank card to work and I contacted the bank to limit my card withdrawal amount to £50. For me, £50 was never enough to tempt me to the roulette wheel. I needed way more than this.

You mentioned you’ve went 100 days before which was great but imagine getting through a full year gamble free. Imagine your mindset after not gambling for 365 days - you may find that you rarely even think about gambling with 365 days gamble free under your belt.

In time, you will find a way to enjoy life without gambling. Try hard to open your mind to that being a possibility.

Every individual finds what’s right for them. ALN doesn’t watch sport of any kind and that works for him. I am a sports fanatic. Take that out of my life and I would be miserable. I can watch sport and not need to gamble. Like everything else, this may be difficult at the beginning but it wasn’t so difficult that I’m not glad to have made the effort.

In my opinion, gambling recovery is about finding a way to have an enjoyable life while going about your business in a normal manner. I try very hard to tread carefully and not upset others but not carrying money for the rest of your life is not normal. Not watching football if you love football is not normal. Live your life to the max and do what you enjoy. And don’t let gambling interfere with that. How do we achieve that? Time, patience and opening our eyes and our minds to the good things along the way.

Good luck to you.

Tomso.

Thanks for both your replies. Max i agree with what you say about GA (which won't be popular as you say).Also ALN I could never go with out sport and its not really where my problem lies with gambling.
Also I don't really agree with you both calling each other out over my post, at the end of the day we are all here for the same reasons and understand what works for some doesn't for others.

Yes my brother Tomso. 100% agree.

People like ALN confuse the issue by conflating their personal mental health issues with their gambling issues.

(I expect ALN will post a few things about how our chosen way of recovery "isn't pure" and leave the site for a few weeks, before coming back again!)

But irrespective of that, I totally agree with you Tomso & Bop. Hope you both find things that'll work for you.

Best wishes to you all, Max

Thanks for the reply tomso. Yes I have handed over my bank cards to my fiancee. I hope she is strong enough to keep them if I hit a really low point

Whatever works for ya ALN, whatever gets you through the day. x

The not watching sports is an interesting one, I’ve done it all my life but I’ve also gambled all my life.Cutting it out would be immensely hard but for sure short term I think it would work, boredom is the absolute trigger for me, keep busy away from sport/gambling and I’m 99% fine , get bored and the urge pops it’s rotten little head out and despite everything I tell myself not to do I go ahead and do it.Ive got a couple of months to sort my financial plan out and get through then I will be on an even keel with money but not lots of it.

I’m in a situation where I simply can’t tell my wife to be but I have told my boss and asked him to take over my cards and bank , it may help it may not but I’m going to try it, I have to I’m on the last chance for me, I’ve tried only once to quit and got through 100 days , now it’s for life ...my biggest battle ever.

Tj

Dear Bop5times,

We are sorry to hear you're struggling at the moment.

Have you spoken to anyone about how you are feeling?

Please phone us on the Helpline or Netline to discuss your thoughts.

Kind regards,

Forum Admin

11 day GF don't feel like betting at all, I also feel very upbeat compared to my last post. Also I know as soon as these fobt ВЈ2 max bets come in I will no longer have the urge to bet no more as I won't get that buzz from a £2 stake.

16 days since my last bet. We all have to start somewhere right. Spent the weekend doing things with family rather than what I would usually have been doing. I didn't believe in all this sort of stuff before but there is definitely some sort of higher power stopping me from gambling... I'm convinced of it!